Book Goals! by Brian Tracy

No One Else Is Responsible

The fourth cause of negative emotions, and the worst of all, is

blaming. When I draw the “Negative Emotions Tree” in my seminars,

I illustrate the trunk of the tree as the propensity to blame other

people for our problems. Once you cut down the trunk of the tree, all

the fruits of the tree, all the other negative emotions, die immediately,

just as when you jerk the plug out of the wall that lights up the

Christmas lights in the tree, all the lights go out instantly.

Responsibility Is The Antidote

The antidote for negative emotions of all kinds is for you to

accept complete responsibility for your situation. You cannot say the

words, “I am responsible!” and still feel angry. The very act of

accepting responsibility short-circuits and cancels out any negative

emotions you may be experiencing.

The discovery of this simple but powerful affirmation, “I am

responsible” and its instant ability to eliminate negative emotions

was a turning point in my life, as it has been for many hundreds of

thousands of my students.

Just imagine! You can free yourself from negative emotions and

begin taking control of your life by simply saying, “I am

responsible!” whenever you start to feel angry or upset for any

reason.

It is only when you free yourself from negative emotions, by

taking complete responsibility that you can begin to set and achieve

goals in every area of your life. It is only when you are free, mentally

and emotionally, that you can begin to channel your energies and

enthusiasms in a forward direction. This is why, without the

acceptance of complete personal responsibility, no progress is

possible. On the other hand, once you accept total responsibility for

your life, there are no limits on what you can be, do and have.

Stop Blaming Others

From now on, refuse to blame anyone for anything - past,

present or future. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, No one can make you feel

inferior without your consent. Buddy Hacket, the comedian, once said,

I never hold grudges; while you’re holding grudges, they’re out dancing!

From this point forward, refuse to make excuses or to justify

your behaviors. If you make a mistake, say, “I’m sorry,” and get busy

rectifying the situation. Every time you blame someone else or make

excuses, you give your power away. You feel weakened and

diminished. You feel negative and angry inside. Refuse to do it.

Control Your Emotions

To keep your mind positive, refuse to criticize, complain about

or condemn other people for anything. Every time you criticize

someone else, complain about something you don’t like, or condemn

someone else for something that they have done or not done, you

trigger feelings of negativity and anger within yourself. And you are

the one who suffers. Your negativity doesn’t affect the other person

at all. Being angry with someone is allowing him or her to control

your emotions, and often the entire quality of your life, at long

distance. This is just plain silly.

Remember, as Gary Zukacs says in his book, Seat of the Soul,

Positive emotions empower; negative emotions disempower. Positive

emotions of happiness, excitement, love and enthusiasm make you

feel more powerful and confident. Negative emotions of anger, hurt

or blame weaken you and make you hostile, irritable and unpleasant

to be around.

Once you decide to accept complete responsibility for yourself,

your situation, and for everything that happens to you, you can turn

confidently toward your work and the affairs of your life. You

become “the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.”

Hello, Mr. President!

In a study done in New York some years ago, researchers

found that the top 3% of people in every field had a special attitude

that set them apart from average performers in their industries. It

was this: they viewed themselves as self-employed throughout their

careers, no matter who signed their paychecks. They saw themselves

as responsible for their companies, exactly as if they owned the

companies personally. You should do the same.

From this moment forward, see yourself as the President of

your own personal services corporation. View yourself as selfemployed.

See yourself as in complete charge of every part of your

life and career. Remind yourself that you are where you are and what

you are because of what you have done or failed to do. You are very

much the architect of your own destiny.