A stepping stone to Gratitude?

The holidays are full of ritual, and implicit in winter holiday celebrations is to give thanks and be jolly.

Motivational speaker Les Brown shared the sentiment, "it's easy to be thankful when your health is good, your relationships are good, and you have plenty of money . . . but the real test, the real test, is when you get knocked down."

I write this because the harmful and the hurtful can happen at any time, but collectively 2020 and 2021 has had universal challenges, where many have experienced knock down punches delivered by life, and maybe it's hard to feel thankful and be jolly. Maybe you are not full of thanks. Maybe you are full of anger.

I think there is a stepping stone to gratitude, and it may be permitting and becoming okay with anger. I define anger "as a temporary infusion of energy to set a boundary with a person or situation, or the energy to create a change to establish a new situation or change of life."

Anger is always the mother bear to the threatened cub, the older brother to the younger, that which is out to protect you from that which hurt you. Anger is the defender of the tender heart.

One may find, when the screaming to oneself in the empty car comes to cease, when the hitting a pillow in a room alone comes to stop, when the echo from shouting out upon a moutain top stops verberating, one may find themself in tears with hands cluthched to the chest - there, there, that there is the tender heart yearning to be heard about that thing that was not okay.

Anger is different than rage. I define rage "as destructive energy where we loose ourselves and hurt either ourself or another." Rage doesn't lead to the tender heart but makes life worse for ourself and others.

A deep dive into our anger always leads to the tender heart. There the tender heart seeks a gentle ear to be heard, and becones an internal change. One changes first in perspective, or character, and from this internal change comes forth a life change that the anger pointed towards needing to make. Whatever movement comes forth changes the position upon which we view the situation. One arrives at a new vantage point, perhaps then one sees the great weaving of the web of the bigger picture, and perhaps then rather spontaneously, authentically, the four chambers of our heart fill up with gratitude, and our exhale naturally becomes a giving of thanks.

Meditation teacher, OSHO, is quoted as saying, "Be grateful to everyone, because everybody is creating space for you to be transformed, even those who think they are obstructing you, even those you think are enemies. Your friends, your enemies, good people and bad people, favorable circumstances, unfavorable circumstances, all together are creating the context in which you can be transformed. Be grateful to all. To those who have helped, to those who have hindered, to those who have been indifferent. Be grateful to all, because all together they are creating the context for your freedom."

The holidays can be a beautiful time, but for those who are struggling with hardship, this is written with hopes to help, and while transformation is personal and comes from within oneself, always remember and seek when needed the help of a licensed professional, family, friends, and spiritual advisors who are also gentle ears for tender hearts. Always remember the power of a healing hug. Remember this can also come from four - legged souls wrapped in fur. We are never truly alone in this world. Help is always around.

The "good and the bad" always has it cycles. Moonlight can teach us that like itself, we will be full again.

I write as U.B. Light, because like everyone else, life has times where it becomes very heavy. My hopes is through writing, to help myself and others make life a little lighter, so YOU too will BE LIGHT.

In the meeting of the tender hearts,

U.B. Light