9 Habits That Make Or Keep You Poor

Being poor is not just about having no money in your life. It can also mean being poor in health, love, and happiness. The persistent lack of money or these other necessities of a comfortable living in a person's life is never something that happens by chance but an effect resulting from causes rooted in behavior and habits. 

The habits we choose to have in our lives set up a series of events that lead us to where we eventually find ourselves whether in desirable or undesirable conditions. Habits can be had to find and change in ourselves since we do them without any conscious effort on our part. It is the way our brains get to automate some tasks to increase efficiency. 

But if these habits are destructive, they eventually lead us into similar circumstances and experiences. This is why I have decided to write about these habits that I had in my own life but could only notice them in my life by observing them in others.

Not Taking Responsibility for Your Actions

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you get into an argument with someone and you 100% know that the other person is in wrong? The dilemma here of course is that this other person thinks you are wrong. Sure enough one of you or both of you must be in wrong but no one is willing to accept. 

Or, have you ever woken up late, maybe for work and you started asking or blaming other people for not waking you up? When you have something going wrong in your life, the first person that you must examine should be yourself. 

If you are an employee and your team delivers poorly on a project, you should ask yourself whether you really did your best on that project first before you point fingers. 

Many people are quick to point out other people's errors but it is quite hard for them to see their own. They can blame but find it hard to take the blame because of fragile egos. Don't be like that. When you cannot see what you did wrong by yourself, you cannot begin to change it.

Even if someone else were to come and point out to you what you may have done better, you will instead become defensive if and pick up an argument with them if you are not willing to take responsibility for your actions. 

Remember, taking responsibility is not to hate on yourself. No. And If you are taking responsibility so that you can hate on yourself, this is also still you playing the victim and having self-pity or low self-esteem which are also destructive. Taking responsibility is meant for you to find ways to improve how you approach that specific task to do it better next time.

How to do this

Whenever you find yourself in an argument with someone who seems to think you are wrong, do not waste your time trying to say they are wrong. Apologize even if you have no idea how you could have been wrong. 

Once the apology is done, you will feel temporary hurt in your emotions. This is because your ego does not want to know it was wrong. An apology will shake up your ego enough for you to examine what you should have done better. During this time, you might feel the need to go back and prove a point. This is called feeding your Ego. Do not waste your time feeding the ego. Just swallow your pride and look for answers. 

Ask yourself questions like what you should have done better. During this time, you will also be able to make resolutions that you will follow easily the next time you have similar experiences. Whichever situation that you find going wrong in your life, ask yourself what you should have done better. Do not involve anyone else. Just you.

Working Harder for Other People Than for Yourself

Most people are more motivated to work harder when the work being done is for other people while they never do the same when they are working on personal projects. People will work so hard on their jobs for long periods but when it comes to working on their side hustles, they decide to only spend about 30 minutes a day of which, 20 of those 30 minutes are spent on social media.

People are more vested when there is another person involved and this habit can keep you poor. If you cannot manage to work longer than an hour on your business a day but are willing to take on a job that makes you work 10 hours a day, then this is a habit that could make or keep you poor. 

If it's money you are after, there are limits to how much of it you can make while you are in a job for example. But when it comes to your own business, you can decide how big you want it to be and how much you want to make. 

It is fine if you do not mind sacrificing your time for a little bit of stability in your life in form of salaries but you should also understand that if you are working hard on someone's work, it better be work that is helping you build a skill that can increase your value in the market place. 

If your job is punching and stapling papers and you work hard at that but do not work on other things like side businesses, then there is a chance you will be struggling with your finances as soon as you get replaced.

How you can do this

You should work just as hard on your side projects at least for an hour every day. This will help you to develop important skills that you can use in the market place and there are also a lot of benefits that having many skills like making you an interesting person, having meaningful relationships, and improved health.

Read a book, take a course, pick a new hobby, make new friends, explore different cultures, and try new things that expand your positive development. Do something that excites you while at the same time helps you to build skills. 

I for example love designing websites because I can't get over the development process behind building one. I find myself obsessing over code or themes and creative ways to build sites. This is a nerdy but really interesting hobby I have and it pays me well through all my client work I do in web design.

Not Optimizing Your Habits.

None of us is perfect at anything. Someone will always be better or worse than you are. We all have to start somewhere in learning anything including forming habits. As you know, the initial versions of anything we start aren't the best.

In work like product development, it is quite clear that people will try to make a better version of the product as they learn from the previous one. The first working product is called a minimum viable product. It is from this product that they create improved versions and iteration to the product. Think of the evolution of the iPhone for example.

People rarely do this when it comes to habits, however. They are stuck in their ways. When you don't try to improve your habits, you begin losing out on the most important steps you need to take to develop. If you are not optimizing your habits for the better, then you are setting yourself up for failure. 

For example, you find that you always get stuck in early morning traffic, which could mean that you need to wake up a little earlier so that you do not have to get stuck instead of thinking that you cannot do anything about it. 

This is a very simple example but you should use it as an example and find ways to optimize your habits especially those that do not serve you positively.

How to optimize your habits

Take time and write down all the challenges that you have in your day-to-day work. 

Brainstorm some ways in which you can change your habits so that you minimize the challenges or get rid of them entirely.

I for example know that my sister sleeps a lot which makes it hard for us to leave for work if she is late due to a traffic jam. I, therefore, wake up as early as 3 am because I know she only wakes up after I have finished taking a shower. This somehow makes her wake up around 5 am giving us enough time to be at work by 6. - Yes I hate traffic so I try to get to work very early. It has also greatly improved my productivity.

You do not have to wake up at 3 am like me but you can work with areas in your life that need improvement and find out ways in which you can optimize your habits to get there.

Poor Money management

Poor money management to me means spending more than I make. Yes, I understand that many people have bills to pay and families to take care of but I am also sure that you can do all of that and still maintain your lifestyle with a 10% reduction on what you spend. 

If you find that you always have something to pay off when your salary or payments come in leaving you with nothing as soon as the money comes, then you have to find ways of cutting back on some of your expenses. 

The book that helped me get a better hold of the way I manage money was a small volume called "The richest man in Babylone". 

In this book, the author taught me the basics of personal finance that I needed to know. All I had to do was to follow the instructions and this made my money management habits much better and as a result, I always have money and a life free of money worries. This helps me plan my days better and also work on things I care about without worrying about where I am going to get money to pay off my bills. 

I recommend reading that book if you want to learn how to manage your money better and if you want another one that goes into detail, then read the book called "Money, Master The Game" By Tonny Robins.

Having no Short Term Goals

Short-term goals would mean anything from a few days to a few months maybe 3 months. They serve as stepping stones and also markers of your progress. 

Long-term goals are great but you have to have assessment and feedback to make sure you are on track to get there and this is done by having short-term goals. Your brain also is wired for priority and efficiency and doesn't handle long-term tasks including long-term goals very effectively.

If I want to make $500,000 in 3 years, my short-term goals will determine how well I am doing on the path to getting there. Short-term goals also break seemingly impossible goals into simple tasks that you can do to get there. 

When I say $500,000 some people would see no reason for such goals but then again, that is my goal but it can also start sounding like a wish if I do not set short-term goals to get there. The same applies to your own goals. 

How to set short term goals

Short-term goals should have elements in them that build characteristics like consistency and resilience. When you design your short-term goals, let them be as stepping stones to long-term goals. 

For example one of my money goals next year is to make $5000/month on medium and $5000/month on red bubble. 

My short-term goals are things like making sure I write one post on medium daily and post 2 designs on my red bubble store a day and also create marketing campaigns for that store. I have other short-term goals I add to these to make sure I get there but this is to show you how you can use your short-term goals. 

Use your short-term goals as goals that help you stick to the process. They are measurable and fully in your control. Having such measurable processes will help you cut out all the noise and distractions you will meet on your way to your goals.

Misusing Your Energy Levels

Energy is what keeps us going. Our bodies and systems are made of energy and we require energy to get things done. 

Most people think of energy in its physical aspect such as the energy we use while lifting things around. But few know about the mental side. Mental energy is therefore misused a lot by those who don't know anything about it. 

There is a reason why a lot of successful people swear by meditation. It is important to have as much mental energy as you can. When you involve yourself in activities like watching the news all the time or wasting your time in negativity of all sorts. 

Doing that dissipates all the energy you need to get work done and by the time you get to it, you are just running on fumes. This affects your performance and therefore your output and life experiences.

How to stop wasting your energy

You must limit your exposure to things that cause you to be negative. News is one of them since it thrives on getting people fearful about something. Practices like meditation can also be useful in helping you calm your mind and restore balance in times of stress. 

Prioritizing tasks that require the use of too much mental energy for when you are most active is also something you can do to get your work done when your mind is most active making you produce better work and also helping you to give your mind plenty of time to recharge for the next day. 

Another way can be taking a lot of sleep. Here is how you may do it most especially if you are an early riser like me.

Not Having a Thoughtful Disagreement

The concept of thoughtful disagreement is something I learned from Ray Dalio a few years back. In short, it is meant to test your ideas against other people's ideas and find out what the best idea is. It is also used to check the integrity of ideas to make sure that they are not wrong. 

Thoughtful disagreements help you to stress test your ideas since they get scrutiny from other people. The winning ideas through thoughtful disagreement help in making better decisions that have a higher likelihood of success. 

If you do not like thoughtful disagreement, meaning that you do not like your ideas being challenged, chances are you may make a lot of mistakes when you set out to execute them which will lead to unnecessary failures. 

Most people always fight to prove that they are right or smarter than the other person. This causes so many mistakes and failures when ideas with little to no integrity are executed.

How to have a thoughtful disagreement

According to Ray Dalio, you should always ask yourself one question when it comes to ideas you believe in. "How do I know I am right?"

Asking this question is not enough. You must share your ideas with someone or a group of people and expose is to the opinions of others without becoming defensive and protecting your ideas. 

This applies not just to ideas but can be things like blog posts, youtube videos, and any form of content or product. 

You must be able to learn how strong or weak your ideas are and how to optimize them best.

Not Minding Your Business

A healthy dose of minding other people's businesses is needed to have a social life. But when you mind other people's businesses at the expense of your own. That is terrible. Minding other people's businesses involves you wasting time forming opinions about other people's choices, and being affected by them. 

When you mind your own business, you won't really be affected by the way other people run their lives. If someone has reached a certain milestone, you will be happy for them and more motivated to reach your own. 

When you do not mind your business, you will feel like everyone is living you behind and that is all you will be thinking about. This will show up in your results in your health, wealth, love, and happiness. 

How to mind your business 

It is hard to mind your business without having something you are working onto develop yourself. The first thing you should do is to start working towards something you have an interest in. If it is a skill, that is even better. 

Accomplishing these things on your own will give you a boost of self-worth and you will naturally pay less attention to the idea of being left behind. Improving yourself is the best way to mind your own business.

Poor Relationship Management

Relationships are important in society. They not only keep you sane and away from dying of loneliness but they are also important in helping you navigate society's challenges that you'll meet along the way. 

From moral support and all the way to useful connections, friendships and relationships serve a lot of purposes.

Poor relationship management may mean a lot of things like:

Not remembering important information like names, birthdays, anniversaries. 

Taking advantage of your friends in form of manipulation or any behavior that exploits them.

Staying in toxic relationships and friendships

Avoiding making friends and networking.

Not checking in on your contacts occasionally

These are some of the most common types of relationship mismanagement. 

Networking, relationships, and friendships are very important in personal advancement. When you have skills, it's your contacts that may recommend people to you that may need your services. 

Mae it a point to reach out to your contacts occasionally. You may not necessarily contact all your friendships every week but even if it's just once a year on someone's birthday or important date, it will go a long way into maintaining your relationships especially those that you aren't in constant contact with. 

For all relationships that you can, try to reach out frequently even if it's just to say hi. Through this, you will be able to keep them alive while helping them and being helped when any of you needs help.

---

Bonus

Self-pity is also a dangerous habit that can keep you poor. In self-pity, you are always playing the victim and finding reasons why you cannot do something. This is dangerous and it makes you fall short of all things you could have easily achieved. 

Misusing risk is also dangerous. By this I mean avoiding risk at all costs and to the other extreme, taking too much and unnecessary risk. Risk is a factor of growth. To grow, you must take some form of risk to get there. A healthy amount of risk is required, however. 

If you find yourself fearing to take risks, chances are you are far behind from where you could have been if you introduced a little bit of risk in your work. If you take too much risk, this is dangerous in all areas of your life and it is unsustainable. Take risks that scare you but not so crazy to the point of meaning life and death. 

---

Conclusion

Being poor is not fate or anything that is destined and so is being rich. Having the right habits though is what gets us to any of those conditions. These were some of those habits and I hope they can help you get to where you want to be.