36 Things I’ve Learned in 36 Years

This is an introduction to my reflections on life, faith, growth and the lessons that shaped me over a period of 36 years.

A few months ago, I turned 36. Huge milestone right?

Birthdays have always made me pause and reflect, but this one felt like more than just another candle on the big fat cake. It felt like a milestone, a subtle invitation to look back at where I’ve been and then, forward to where I’m going.

There is something about growing older that changes the way you see time. When you are younger, birthdays often feel like celebrations only. You count gifts, messages, laughter, surprises and all the visible things. But as the years pass, birthdays begin to carry deeper meaning. They become markers of survival, evidence of grace, reminders of battles won quietly, and proof that life kept moving even when certain seasons felt heavy.

My journey has been far from straightforward. Yes, it’s been full of storms, bumps, rocks, stones; whatever that is. I was born and raised in Cameroon, where life taught me resilience from an early age. Later, I moved to Japan, where I now teach English mainly while navigating a culture and language so different from my own.

That move alone carried lessons I could never have learned by staying where I was comfortable. Starting again in a new country teaches humility. It teaches patience and courage in the smallest ways, like learning to ask for help, making mistakes publicly, or trying again after feeling out of place. Sometimes, growth does not arrive dramatically, it arrives in the quiet act of refusing to just give up.

Along the way, I’ve worn many hats: educator, entrepreneur, NGO founder, mother, and dreamer. Each chapter has stretched me, broken me at times, and rebuilt me with new wisdom. This new wisdom refines me daily.

Some roles came with applause. Others came with sacrifice no one saw. Some seasons looked successful on the outside while I was still trying to hold myself together on the inside. That too is part of adulthood: learning that not everything valuable is visible. Strength is often hidden. Healing is often private. Progress is sometimes silent.

I’ve learned that growth doesn’t come neatly packaged, no. It comes through wins and loss.

Through starting businesses, watching some succeed while others failed terribly.

Through moving across the world and learning what it means to begin all over again.

Through seasons of faith, doubt, healing, discovery and rediscovery.

Through friendships that blessed me and disappointments that matured me.

Through prayers that were answered and prayers that were answered differently than I expected.

Through moments when I felt strong and moments when I questioned everything.

When I stepped into 36, I felt a new kind of clarity. This year, I want to embrace peace, purpose and joy over anything else. I want to pour more into the things and people that truly matter, and release what no longer serves me. I want to live more intentionally; celebrating the present while still dreaming boldly about the future, yes.

I also want to stop measuring life only by speed. The world often tells us to rush, compare, compete and prove ourselves constantly. But peace has taught me another language. Some things bloom slowly. Some answers come late. Some doors open only after seasons of waiting. Not being early does not mean being lost.

That’s why I’m writing. Not because I have it all figured out, NO!

I’m writing because reflection has power. Sometimes when we put our experiences into words, we realize we survived more than we gave ourselves credit for. We notice patterns, growth, grace and lessons that pain tried to hide from us.

I believe stories connect us. Sometimes all we need is to hear that someone else has walked through the fire and still found their way forward, against every odd, backlash, difficulty… you name it.

So here I am, opening up my heart and words and wounds maybe. In the weeks ahead, I’ll be sharing reflections on personal growth, healing, self-love, faith and the small truths that have carried me through. The first in this series will be “36 Things I’ve Learned in 36 Years” which is a collection of lessons that shaped me, challenged me, and continue to guide me.

Some lessons came through joy. Others came through tears. Some arrived quickly. Others took years to understand. But all of them became part of the woman I am still becoming.

If you’re reading this, welcome! Thank you for being here! My hope is that something in these words will produce a little flash, growth in you, inspire you, or simply remind you that you are not alone on your journey (hugs and…).

Here’s to 36 and many more, cheers!

Here’s to embracing the mess, the beauty, and the lessons of life.

And here’s to sharing the journey; mine, yours, and ours together.

Hurray! Do not miss any of these lessons from my big 36!

Come back here for Lesson 1: Peace is more valuable than proving a point

I appreciate you!