10 Reasons It's Time to Let Toxic Friendships Go
It's no secret that toxic friendships can have a negative and ongoing effect on your life, but sometimes you just need to bite the bullet and move on when it comes to people who are dragging you down.
Are you struggling with toxic friendships? Do you call your friends to express how much they mean to you only to end up in a conversation that is constantly dragging on? You may have friends who are trying their best but still causing problems. It's time to let go of these relationships and move on, without guilt or regret.
When we're dealing with toxic friendships, our friends are often the ones hurting us. They don't want to admit that they hurt us even though they do and it's hard to tell them. It's a confusing situation because we're missing out on tons of opportunities for support and intimacy. It's time to ditch the toxic friendships and focus on keeping healthy relationships with people who care about us.
If you have trouble letting go of toxic friendships, here are 10 reasons why it's time to let go:
1. They're draining your energy
Friends make a huge impact in our lives. They can be there to support us and lift us up when we're down. They can be there to encourage us when we're struggling with a goal or even just day to day tasks. When you have toxic friendships, however, you're continually going to the well only to find out that it's dry.
You try to talk about your problems and they seem uninterested or they don't make much effort to listen. When you reach out for support, you feel like it's being wasted on someone who doesn't have time for you. It's exhausting trying to figure out what they want from the friendship while also balancing your own needs and desires.
2. They're affecting your relationships with other people
Just because you can see the damage a toxic friendship is doing, it doesn't mean that they want it to stop. It's hard to get them to realize their actions are causing devastation, but if you're patient and persistent, you'll get the point across. Toxic friendships will only bring negative attention onto you and the people around you.
When they begin fighting with someone else over something they didn't do, that's when people will start talking about it. Your friends may know what they did, but they'll pretend as if nothing is going on when everyone around them is aware of how terrible things have become. Toxic friendships will make everything feel uncomfortable within your social circles.
3. They're taking advantage of your love
When you love someone, you want them to be happy. Your friends can be that person who makes you feel great about yourself. You want your friends to succeed, but when they're in toxic friendships, they end up bringing those feelings down. Instead of feeling good or optimistic, they're hurt and angry because their friend doesn't care enough to treat them with respect.
You may have tried explaining how the friendship is hurting them, but in the end it's only making things worse because it puts more strain on the relationship. Toxic friendships can be as harmful for yourself as it is for your friend.
4. They're trying to control you
At times when your toxic friendship is causing you pain, you may have the urge to do something about it. You may want to get rid of them, but you're afraid of what will happen if they leave. They tried to talk down on you and hurt your feelings, so why should they be the only ones feeling bad? Toxic friendships try to control your life and make decisions for you. It's hard not having a say in what's happening in your own life. If a friendship gets too much for you, getting them out of your life will help relieve some of the pain that they've caused.
5. They're making you feel guilty
You may feel like you're betraying a friend simply by wanting to let them go. You try to put your feelings aside because they don't want to hear it. You try to start seeing their side of the story, but it just makes you feel worse. It's hard when someone you care about is guilt tripping you into staying in the relationship. It can make you feel like you're walking on eggshells when with them, because they expect nothing but positivity and praise from you. Toxic friendships are never doing anyone any good, so having them out of your life will only make it better.
6. They're not taking responsibility for their actions
When toxic friendships are going on in your life, you may find it hard to feel like you can even blame yourself. You may be trying to get them to see the error of their ways, but they don't want to listen or try to accept responsibility for what they've done. They're always trying to blame someone else when things go wrong and seeing things from their perspective, but it's time for them to understand that there's no excuse for treating others the way they have been. If a friendship is causing pain and draining you dry, it's time to put a stop to it and move on.
7. They're draining your time
When you have toxic friendships, you may spend a lot of time on them. You care about them and want to help support them in every way that you can, but in the end it's only making things worse. It's stressful and exhausting to constantly feel like a friend is doing nothing more than putting you down. They may be hurting themselves, but they don't see it because they're already at their breaking point.
Toxic friends are usually someone who doesn't appreciate what they have and is constantly demanding more from you. They can drain your time without realizing how much stress they've caused you to feel over the years. You need to take the time to think about yourself and your mental health. It's time to get them out of your life so you can start feeling better.
8. They're trying to push your boundaries
When you're close with someone, you want them to be open with you so that you can feel closer together. You want to know what's going on and how they feel, but when they're pushing those boundaries, it can make it hard for you to trust them.
Toxic friendships are usually one-sided, which means that their feelings always come first and yours are last on their list. When someone is constantly getting hurt by a friend, they may wonder if it's even worth staying around for any longer. Toxic friendships are usually not worth it, but when someone is hurting them on purpose, it's time to let them go.
9. They're doing terrible things to themselves
If someone that you care about is taking actions that can hurt them, you may want to set a boundary for how much of their behavior is acceptable. You may want to be cautious about what they're doing and how often they're doing it. Just because you may not notice their actions doesn't mean that they're not being destructive.
They may be using drugs or alcohol, which can lead to a lot of other problems including mental illness and even suicide. Toxic friendships usually aren't doing anyone any good, especially when they're doing dangerous things.
10. They're always putting you down
You may be trying to get your toxic friend to see the error of their ways, but they always feel like you should be the one on your knees. It never feels good when someone is constantly making jokes at your expense or talking down on you. It's also a sign of rude behavior, which can cause you to feel inferior around them. You may catch yourself trying to please them or avoid speaking up so that they won't get angry with what you have to say. Toxic friendships can be a lot of work if they're causing you to feel like you'll never be good enough as they are.
All toxic friendships are not created equal and neither are all toxic friends. You can feel better about your friendship if it's one that's worth ending or a person that's worth sticking with. If your friend is causing you to feel bad about yourself or constantly being rude, it may be time to cut them out of your life for good.
You never want to put yourself in a place where you're miserable, so move on from a friendship if it's hurting you more than it's helping. Toxic friendships aren't worth giving up anything for, so make sure that you know what the right decision is in order to start feeling better again.