The Science of Happiness

Social well-being is an umbrella term for a multidimensional concept that pertains to one’s overall physiological, emotional, cognitive, and social functioning. Over the past decade, social scientists have discovered a plethora of ways in which individuals can increase their social well-being. The following piece summarizes recent research into a clear guide of 5 do’s and 5 don’ts for anyone trying to improve their well-being.

DO’s

1. Practice Gratitude.

An important lesson to remember is that whether we have a good or bad day depends more on our perception of events than the objective conditions of those events. Being grateful is a feeling that can come naturally, but it is also a skill that can be practiced and strengthened. Gratitude involves acknowledging the things you have in life and recognizing good things that exist outside of yourself. A research study by Emmons and McCullough in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology showed that individuals who practice gratitude are 25% happier, have closer relationships, and sleep better than those who do not, even six months later. So why isn’t everyone practicing gratitude? The answer lies in our consumer culture: we are socialized to be ungrateful so that we continue to buy products that we think will make us happier. As a result, we often forget all the blessings we already have. Here’s the tip: Get a journal and designate it solely for gratitude. Start each day by writing down one thing you are grateful for. As time goes by, you will not only feel an increase in positive emotions but an increase in physical health as well. Most importantly, you will start to focus on the things you have rather than the things you lack. This can act as a mental health booster shot. A little gratitude goes a long way!

2. Create Tiny Health Habits.

Habits make up 20% - 90% of our daily behaviors. Habits are really important because they are automatic and save our brains from having to make taxing decisions all day long. However, it can be really difficult to start and maintain a new positive habit. BJ Fogg introduced the public to the magic of tiny habits in his Ted talk, “Forget big change, start with a tiny habit.” Fogg used the acronym B = MAT to explain a simple way in which people can start successfully incorporating healthy habits into their routine. B stands for behavior change, or whatever you’d like to start doing more of; whether that be exercise, flossing your teeth, reading more books, or talking to a loved one. To do this, you need MAT. M stands for motivation: you must have some level of motivation to do this behavior. It is easiest to start a new habit when the motivation required is low, which is why Fogg says “start small” by running for 2 minutes, flossing one tooth, reading one page, sending one text, etc. A stands for the ability to do the task: your new habit can either be easy or hard depending on your ability. To begin a new habit you want to start with something easy to do because it will increase the chances of you keeping up with it. For example, put your running shoes beside your bed, download kindle on your phone, buy those neat floss picks that make flossing super easy, etc. to make it easier for yourself. Finally, the T stands for trigger: choose an existing habit in your routine which occurs at the same rate as you want your new habit to occur. This will be the trigger for your new tiny habit behavior. For example, if I finish breakfast, then I will do 5 jumping jacks; in this example, the trigger is finishing breakfast, and doing 5 jumping jacks is the behavior. Over time, you can slowly increase the duration and difficulty of the habit until suddenly you’ve made a huge behavior change. Utilizing the tiny habit technique will not only save you mental energy, but can be used to improve physical health, social relationships, and many other things. Here’s the tip: design a tiny habit for something positive you’ve been wanting to implement in your routine and try it out.

3. Prioritize Experiences Over Things.

The truth is that materialism is a happiness leech. In the article “How Gratitude Beats Materialism,” author Jason Marsh explains that materialistic people are less happy than their peers, are less satisfied with life, and suffer higher levels of anxiety, depression, and substance abuse. As you can see, this ties in with tip #1 on the benefits of gratitude, but it is a little different. Marsh reported that individuals who spent their money on experiences, i.e. family trips, activities, and trying new things with others, were happier than those who spent their money on items or objects. Buying material items can feel euphoric for a moment, but that feeling wears off rapidly. When we spend money on experiences we anticipate them longer, enjoy them longer, and remember them for longer. Moreover, experiences can be shared with others and can strengthen our social ties. It can be difficult to decide what purchases are worth it, so here’s the tip: prioritize spending money on experiences before material items, and you will be healthier and happier in the long run. Don’t let flashy ads and celebrity lavish lifestyles fool you; ask yourself, would you rather have more or have done more?

4. Set Intrinsic Goals.

Goals are important because they can give our lives structure, motivation, and purpose. However, having goals does not automatically lead to high levels of well-being. As we learned from Robert Emmon’s article “Personal Goals, Life Meaning, and Virtue,” there are many different types of goals with a variety of outcomes. Extrinsic goals are those based on perceptions of others, a.k.a. the focus is outside of ourselves. Common examples of extrinsic goals are money, status, and power. The pursuit of extrinsic goals is associated with narcissism, mental illness, and lower well-being. On the other hand, intrinsic goals lead to higher self-esteem, personal growth, and increased connections with social partners and the community. Intrinsic goals are goals that focus on some aspect of our inner selves and are pursued for our own benefit. Associated with the highest benefit to well-being are intrinsic goals that involve spirituality, intimacy, and generativity. This could look like setting a goal to become more involved in religion, dedicating more time to creative passions or hobbies, or even committing to improving your close relationships. It is important to note that while we set many goals for ourselves, we are also socialized into goals by family members, peers, schools, and even society. Here’s the tip: start setting intrinsic goals that will foster your inner growth, and reflect on any goals you suspect may be rooted in extrinsic pursuits.

5. Learn to Love Being Vulnerable.

Social connection may be the single most important factor in our well-being. Humans are inherently social animals, and our survival depends on connecting with others. The witty Brene Brown introduced the topic of vulnerability in her ted talk “The Power of Vulnerability,” and explained how being vulnerable is key to fostering connections with others. After years of social work, it became clear to Brown that having connections improved people’s tolerance of adversity. Brown decided to investigate the difference between people who had connections, and people who didn't. Her biggest discovery was that those who had abundant connections were experts in vulnerability. Vulnerability is having the courage to be yourself, having compassion for yourself, and finding connections as a product of your authenticity. Sometimes it is easier to numb our vulnerability… We can do this through shame, blaming others to discharge pain, and pretending that our actions don’t affect others. But numbing vulnerability also numbs all emotions, negative and positive, and makes connection nearly impossible. Learning to love being vulnerable will lead to more connection with others, greater happiness, and higher well-being. Here are some ways you can practice being vulnerable:

Let yourself be seen.

Love wholeheartedly.

Practice gratitude and lean into joy.

Most importantly, believe that you are enough.

DON’TS

1. Social Comparison.

Social comparison is the process by which we compare ourselves to others to evaluate how well we are doing. However, this is a catch-22. The world is so vast that there will always be someone ahead of you in some aspect of life, so the social comparison technique is doomed to be a source of negative feedback. One key facet of well-being that social comparison damages is our cognitive well-being. Cognitive well-being describes how satisfied we are with our lives and depends on our thoughts and evaluations of where we are. My advice is to ditch social comparison because it will only lower your cognitive well-being and foster hindering feelings of sadness and jealousy. If you catch yourself comparing your life or achievements to others: stop the thought, acknowledge your unique journey through life, admire their achievements, and see if there’s anything you can learn from them.

2. Media Overload.

We live in an age where technology is ingrained in our daily lives. A lot of it is beneficial and helps us function as a society. The downside is the occurrence of ‘Media Overload’: we are spammed with media all day long through our emails, our social networks, our mobile devices, and oftentimes our jobs. Because there is so much information available, our brains are tempted to absorb as much as possible. However, too much media intake can lower our well-being. Media overload encourages procrastination, laziness, and anxiety, and uses up our focus so we neglect other important areas of our lives. Here’s the tip, inspired by Cal Newport’s article “On Digital Minimalism”: stop overloading your brain by becoming a media minimalist. Choose which media sources are beneficial to you, and choose only one for a certain function it provides. For example, if you value podcasts, choose your favorite app or streaming service to keep. Cut out all the rest, and in your free time, try to substitute exercise, reading, or another non-digital activity instead of going online and scrolling endlessly. When you do use media, do so deliberately to complete a task. You will be surprised at how much extra time, focus, and energy you now have to do the things you enjoy.

3. Junk Food.

Michael Moss’s revolutionary article “The Extraordinary Science of Addictive Junk Food”, reveals that highly processed food is designed by big companies to be hyper-palatable. Hyperpalatable describes when the taste is just right, and the food dissolves on your tongue so you don’t even register the calories you’re eating. In this way, junk food tricks your brain into wanting more and becomes addicting. High levels of sugar, sodium, and fat found in most junk foods can cause a barrage of negative side effects on your health including lethargy, decreased concentration, decreased motivation, skin problems, and in extreme cases, obesity, heart disease, and diabetes. The food corporations don’t want you to know this, because they benefit from your business. So here's my tip: cut out the junk wherever possible, or save it for rare occasions. Check the nutrition label on the foods you buy, especially the sugar, salt, and fat content. Your body and your mind will flourish without all that junk.

4. Resentment.

Holding onto resentment is like holding hot coals for somebody else. Recent studies report that resentful people on average were less happy, had more health problems, and had shorter lifespans than less resentful people. The effects of resentment are good demonstrators of how our emotions affect our well-being, and how holding on to negative emotions can manifest into physical and mental problems. Forgiveness, or letting go of resentment and fostering a love for another, is an evolutionary trait. Individual forgiveness increases social ties. Society-wide forgiveness can break the cycle of revenge and counter revenge and allows groups to heal from oppression. Here’s the tip: don’t hold onto the hurt when someone wrongs you, or else you will only expand on the original wound. You will experience more joy and less anger the more you forgive.

5. Multitasking

Self-Control is the process of overriding immediate urges to achieve long-term goals and is necessary to perform complex social roles. It is also vital in the domains of self-regulation such as emotion, thought, impulses, and performance. In other words, self-control is needed to make decisions, utilize potential, and meet academic or social goals. But self-control is not unlimited. Like a well, it can be depleted and takes time to refill. Multitasking is a self-control eater. Trying to multitask may seem efficient, but it depletes self-control rapidly and lowers performance on one single task. My advice is to stop multitasking when it comes to important tasks in school, at work, and with others, and just take one thing at a time. You will use your self-control reserve more effectively, and perform better in all areas.