Sheets and Giggles

I was scrolling through Facebook, and what caught my eye was the phrase “like melatonin but without the possible side effects.” And well, I can’t take melatonin because I take a medication for a blood clotting disorder that does not interact well with it – so, I stopped scrolling to see what this might be. (Also thinking, probably it’s going to be CBD something or other. Everything right now seems to be CBD something or other, and I’ve tried them all, and none of them worked. As you’re reading this right now, you’re probably thinking of the CBD product that you use, and that you love – and I’m really very happy for you that it does. I do not question your conviction that it does. Heck, I’m jealous that it does, but it does not work for me, so please stop recommending it. Thanks, everyone.) But, anyway. It wasn’t CBD. It was sheets.

Sheets are like melatonin?

These sheets were made from eucalyptus. (I grew up in Northern California, with eucalyptus growing everywhere, and I love the smell. It feels like home.) And apparently, they are meant to be so soft, and keep your body naturally cooler while you sleep, promoting a better night of sleep. Three times better, supposedly.

I pictured myself, slipping into my bed, between this perfect and magical set of sheets. I saw myself sleeping soundly (with a little smile on my face, dreaming happy dreams). I imagined how I’d wake up feeling so good that I’d naturally want to exercise more. I’d eat better. I’d obviously become thinner. I would be more patient, and my daughter would be inspired by my positive attitude, and suddenly her life would just feel a little sunnier, too.

So yes. I ordered the sheets, in eucalyptus green. (Okay, I confess. I actually bought two sets, one in the light green and the other set in charcoal grey.) And then I waited for my perfect sheets to arrive, bringing happiness and light into my life.

When the sheets came, I realized that I hadn’t actually noticed the brand name – Sheets & Giggles. The box was pretty, and the logo was appealing, but if I had noticed the brand name, I’m not sure I would have bought them. Somehow, the cheeky name didn’t go with my image of myself, sleeping in my new spa-like bed, waking up a more spiritually enlightened, empathetic, intuitive person. Probably a bit like Oprah.

But, anyway – I didn’t see the name, and I had placed the order, and I wasn’t disappointed. They came in this lovely drawstring bag, made from the same material as the sheets. (I kept the bag and I use it to store dog bags in in the entryway, to grab as I go out. It feels a little decadent.) I liked the colors, and they were very soft, even before being washed.

I immediately did a load of laundry, washing my new sheets, and drying them with my eco-conscious wool dryer balls (okay, yes, that was another social media shopping whim – but they are great and I love them and they work!). Then I got busy, and forgot to remove them from the dryer and make my bed. It was late, and I was getting out of the shower, about to head to my room, when I remembered. The sheets. There was a tiny moment of hesitation. The thought that it was late, and maybe I should just put them my bed tomorrow. But then I remembered the spa-like and heavenly experience ahead of me, and stripped my bed of its plain cotton sheets, and carefully smoothed my new sheets onto the mattress. I made sure to give my comforter an extra fluff, and piled my pillows in just the right arrangement (this is something of an art, and something I take seriously, and more than one boyfriend has told me that he wants to make a short film of me placing my pillows on my bed for sleep – two, two boyfriends actually said that. I used to feel embarrassed of my need to have just the right pillow arrangement, but now I embrace it). And then, finally, it was time to slip into my bed and experience my sheets and my new life.

And then what, you ask? Did I regret the purchase, or was this a worthwhile splurge? Was I cooler, better rested, getting more exercise, eating better, thinner and a better parent? Well. The answer is – actually, kind of, yes.

I think just having the sheets made me feel happy. They were pretty, and very soft. That was undeniable. And I think they actually did keep me a little cooler. (I’m in my late 40’s and oy, the hot flashes are a real thing, and I really do think I wasn’t waking up sweaty nearly as often.) And I think this feeling of being just – pleased? The glow that came from an act of self care, made me go into the next day feeling more content…. So then, the next day, when I walked the dog, I did walk further. We’re living at the Jersey shore right now during quarantine, and it’s winter, but it’s still lovely to walk on the boardwalk, and the empty beach. Just me and our little old man of a shih tzu who hates the water, but loves the sand. And I came home feeling good in my body, and wanted to keep that feeling, so I felt inspired to eat better for the rest of the day, cutting down on sugars, and skipping processed foods. I drank more water. I planned an art project that evening with my daughter (we painted some of the shells that I had gathered in my walk on the beach). And after my productive day of fresh air, exercise, and quality family time, I did fall asleep a little earlier that night. And I slept soundly… and then, the next day …. Something similar happened. And now it’s been two weeks (I’ve got the grey sheets on now), and I’m realizing …. I think maybe they worked. I think I actually do feel more rested. (Three times more? I don’t know …. But … maybe.) And I can’t say that there were any negative side effects from the purchase. So, I guess for me, they are actually better than melatonin.

So, there you have it. Now you know. I clicked on the ad, added them to my cart, and splurged. And I’m so glad I did. I love my sheets, and right now, in this moment, I feel happy. I even just giggled a little.