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Let’s Just Learn How to F.L.Y.

Discover your best you

By Denise J WilliamsPublished about a month ago 3 min read

First Love Yourself...

Back in the day when I was growing up, it was cool to be FLY! Fly at that time was a slang term that meant you were sharp, cool, cute and ready to take on the world. We used that word the way younger people nowadays use the word SLAY. I guess every generation has its own style of slang communication but I still use Fly from time to time.

As I’ve grown up, I've embraced a new acronym for the slang term FLY.

I call it F.L.Y. which means First, Love Yourself. In today’s society, it seems so acceptable to sacrifice ourselves for the greater good. It’s ok for us to be in debt, miserable, rude, overworked and aggressive toward others. We're physically and mentally exhausted, and it seems ok to be impatient or demanding. People are so desensitized to the needs of others these days that they believe it is “normal” to be this way. It’s not normal to be broken and unhappy. It's not normal to feel like our lives are irrelevant. Going through life in a zombie-like state of just working to pay bills and die is the most abnormal thing I can think of. Somehow, I believe we’ve gotten off track. This whole way humanity has changed is not for our betterment. We’re digressing at an alarming rate as a society and we need to as the young ones say, "Get Woke."

A lot of people would probably blame social media for the breakdown in communication among us, but I believe that is just the tip of the iceberg. I think we need to be mended in our spirit. I think we're all hurting in some way. Some of us just cover it up better than others. We should consider returning to being F.L.Y.! We need to love ourselves again and not feel guilty about it. We all need down-time, me time or some time to pamper ourselves in every way so we can appreciate and create healthy relationships. I think we need to slow down and start giving ourselves a chance to discover the happiness within our reach because we all deserve it. We should love each other enough to welcome joy into our lives again so that we can give our best selves to society. The disintegration that we are witnessing in human relationships today is in my opinion; tied to us not being able to fully communicate our emotional needs. We’ve forgotten that it is totally ok to be a bit selfish and love ourselves. We need to re-learn how to mentally, spiritually and physically meet our own needs. Embracing wholeness and tapping into inner peace, should be a lifelong endeavor. In finding that fulfillment we get to move forward in life in a productive way.

In our individual life journey, we all have had or will have a negative experience that will leave us a little broken. However, as we grow, the goal should be to find out how to repair that busted part of us so that we can ultimately give our best to everyone in our sphere of influence. There are some who do just that and live in that fulfilled state.

However, there are many who are so broken and wounded, so worn down after years of neglect, they've lost their way in trying to find that healthy place and struggle to process the pain. Their goal has become survival at any cost and the pilgrimage to do that literally wears them out as they try to cope alone. They’ve learned only how to best manage symptoms, instead of dealing with the root causes of their dysfunction. Along the way, they will undoubtedly hurt others. They may not set out to do so, but it still happens because they are too self-absorbed in their own torment to see clearly.

Those who take that different path and choose to be F.L.Y. are my heroes! They are the courageous ones that realize they have issues. They know life isn’t perfect nor are the people in it but understand their future and sanity is definitely worth fighting for. It's a lesson for all of us. Take some time today and do something just for you. Endeavor to be F.L.Y.


About the Creator

Denise J Williams

Dr. Williams is a featured writer and guest editor for Coastal Today magazine. She was a frequent host on IMPACT Radio on WCGL FM 94.7, sponsored by The Florida Star Newspaper. Her focus is on the unique needs of women.

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Comments (1)

  • Sweileh 888about a month ago

    Thank you for the interesting and delicious content. Follow my story now.

Denise J WilliamsWritten by Denise J Williams

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