What I Would Give

Try for a moment to imagine you are an awkward 13 year old in that time in your life when nothing makes sense. Your friends are changing, your home life is changing, and everything feels unhinged. You end up having one of the worst days in awhile and you just want to escape, to be anywhere but where you are... So you pick up a book. It does not look like much at first but it is written in such a way that one moment you are opening to the first page and then all of a sudden its over. You've finished it and without really knowing how, it helped you work through that bad day. You read it again, and find something new hiding between the lines that helps you resolve something that was weighing heavily on your heart. Suddenly it becomes your safe place, you check it out from the library every other week because you know that even though you have read it a million times you will still find something new that helps you. It helps you to realize that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, that change can actually be a good thing. Even if it is scary at first. It inspires you, to be you. It inspires you into believing maybe, just maybe someday you can write like that too. I did so many chores and saved money for weeks so that I could buy my own copy of Beauty by Robin McKinley. To some it is considered "just" another retelling of Beauty and the Beast, which is one of my favorite storries anyway. Now it is the most loved in my collection. If you looked at my shelf it would not take you long to find it. Her book, her WORDS were the spark that lit my passion, and I have been writing ever since. I did everything I could to get my hands on books, finding all the ways the authors used words to express the world inside of them. I took every elective class in high school that had anything to do with writing. I joined the creative writing club to fill the void when I ran iut of classes to take. I have tried writing everything under the sun to have an outlet for the words in my heart. Poetry (I actually suck at it), songs, articles (I hated all the rules). I finally settled on the freedom of writing fiction and novels. I have written piece after piece trying to finish, trying to reach the point where my words would inspire someone else. That someday my words would help anchor someone else to the world. I want my book to be that worn out copy on the shelf. That is my passion, writing with the belief that someday in the future my words will build someone up, the same way my favorite book had. I want other people to feel the way that I do when I connect with the words on the page. I want them to find pieces of themselves between the lines like I do. When I found this platform I was unsure, but being able to post here has been a brand new experience. Now that I can see how many people have read what I have written it gives me hope for that future. It is still a small percentage of people but it makes me feel as if I am right on the edge of reaching my goal. Reaching someone with my words that needs them. I can not imagine a better feeling, knowing that I can get there. Even if it is small steps every once in a while it is still a step!