What I've Been Up To

Hey, I'm back, and I feel it's time for me to catch you guys up on what I've been doing.

I know it's been a while since I've written anything like this, but until recently, I haven't really had the drive to write anything about my life.

I know, it's sad.

And maybe you don't care about my ups and downs. And that's okay. I'm still going to write about it, mainly because sharing my life with you is like my version of journaling.

So, with that out of the way, let's get to it.

I Got Covid!

The first thing that comes to mind is my stepdad giving me covid (eyeroll).

He'd gone to a music thing at the end of August 2022 and hadn't been careful enough. Apparently, he'd camped next to someone who ended up testing positive.

And since we live in a single-wide mobile home, I couldn't really get away from him.

I'm not someone who gets sick often, and I'd gotten the available shots and booster, so, yeah, I was mad at him.

It wasn't fun, having gotten a fever for the first time in forever, along with a string of other symptoms.

And unlike him, I couldn't just sit in my chair and do nothing. My mom, who managed not to get sick, wouldn't have let me.

But I also couldn't do much of anything for long stretches, as I was drained of energy and trying to let my body fight off the virus. So, I was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I also have a weird after-effect of getting it, which I'm not sure I wanna share since it's kind of embarrassing. But it didn't impact my writing ability, so that's good.

My Trip to Texas

Now, this one had a bit of drama surrounding it.

Granted, much of it was my fault. But much of it wasn't.

So, this started in December when my guy (gonna call him M for the sake of privacy) invited me to spend two weeks with him in San Antonio, Texas, being together for Christmas and New Year's.

Of course, I said yes.

I hadn't seen him in forever and missed him greatly. Plus, I needed to break free of my routine and parents for a little while. Although flying on a plane by myself intimidated me a bit.

My mistake was not telling my parents until a few days before I was supposed to leave.

I know I sound like an asshole, and I'm cringing as I write this part. But I was afraid about how they would react to me leaving for two weeks to be with a guy in another state.

And yes, I had my ass chewed out hard for it, along with guilt trips and scare tactics thrown at me. So, it was not a fun evening. But my mom did pay for a shuttle to SeaTac airport afterward.

The flights were nice, although I had to wake at five am and had a four-hour layover in Vegas. Also, the time zone changed twice on the flight to San Antonio, so it was almost midnight by the time I arrived.

Then my Uber dropped me off at the wrong apartment complex, leaving me locked in. And when M finally found me, I was sitting on the fence, one leg hanging over each side.

Luckily, he's a strong guy, so he made sure I didn't hurt myself as I slid my ass off the edge, catching me so I didn't fall on my face. But I wasn't happy with anyone at that point, all my butterflies about seeing him dead.

My mood softened once we got to his place, discovering his roommate (who was visiting his family in Seattle and who I'll call W) had a dog and then him feeding me.

And for the most part, there wasn't much drama. Mainly us driving around, binge-watching shows, having deep conversations, and other things.

The drama that was there was from either us reading W's messages with several girls (he made the mistake of not taking his iPad with him, and M sucked me into it) or my friend, S, becoming jealous of the fact that I was over there.

My other friend, R, was also not doing mentally well at that time, although he kept to himself for most of the time.

But I mostly managed to block all that out. There was no way in hell I was about to allow my personal drama to keep me from enjoying myself. The first time I had personal drama in several years.

But while I was waiting for my flight in the Vegas airport, S decided to confess his unresolved feelings for me, feelings I didn't share. And I was already an emotional mess from missing M after leaving to return home.

So, in the middle of the night at the airport, I couldn't keep myself from crying (which I had been doing on and off earlier) as he told me sweet things, things I probably would've liked a year or so earlier.

Luckily, almost no one paid me any attention, as most were asleep. I would've tried sleeping, but I had been too paranoid about someone stealing from me.

So, I was tired AF by the time the shops opened so I could get something to eat before boarding my final flight to SeaTac and then my shuttle back to Bellingham.

By the time I got home, I felt like a zombie inside as I went to shower and opened my presents.

I felt out of place the whole time. Then, more emotions rushed through me as the weight slammed onto my shoulders, and I went into my room, crying some more.

I also told S I didn't feel the same, which was not fun, especially after being awake for over twenty-four hours. I finally managed to sleep after going to bed at around nine pm, though.

But that whole experience changed me a bit. M gave me a new perspective on many aspects of my life, especially how I let people treat me.

Due to various events in my life, I have difficulty letting people do things for me without feeling guilty. But I was able to let that go a bit with M. Although my unfamiliarity with things down there helped.

Being away also let me introspect in a manner I had been unable to do before. I had felt much lighter being away from 'home.' I didn't even realize it until a few nights before I left.

And now I long for something more than I have here.

I Lost My Blog Editing Gig

Yeah, toward the end of January of this year, after I was already back in Washington, I received an email from my boss saying they had run out of funds and could no longer keep me on.

Of course, I was disappointed as hell. I really enjoyed that job. I was learning about various topics while receiving a steady source of income. But I knew my boss felt awful about the situation, so I wasn't alone in the feelings.

The main upside is that I've had a pretty consistent line-up of editing gigs since February. I just need to learn how to confidently ask for more money since it is my business.

I've been trying to do some freelance writing. And while I haven't had luck so far, I will keep trying until I do.

My Birthday Daytrip to Anacortes, WA

This just happened, since my birthday is on the second of this month.

We hadn't been anywhere as a family since Vegas for my twenty-third birthday, which was both fun and exhausting, and we wanted to go somewhere.

So, the fam and I went down there on Sunday to celebrate my turning twenty-four.

My mom had made a reservation at 13moons Steakhouse at Swinomish Casino and Lodge a few days before because they have an espresso creme brulee, and she knows how much I love coffee-anything.

But for most of the day, we were in Anacortes, surprised about how many shops were closed. It was like being in Lynden on a Sunday (it's a very church-oriented town.)

Luckily, after having a meh lunch, we found a few places to browse. And I bought a journal, a purple double-walled coffee cup, and an artsy Bigfoot sweatshirt.

I also wanted a pair of steampunk earrings, but I couldn't verify that they were hypoallergenic. And there's no point in me having jewelry I can't wear.

After a few hours of looking around, we headed to the casino, where I basically stood and wandered around for an hour and a half. No, I'm not a gambler, and they didn't have anything else for me to do to fill the time.

So, I was happy when 6:30 finally came around, and able to go into the steakhouse. We had an excellent server. And the food was delicious.

All in all, it was a good day.

To Wrap Things Up

So, yeah, this is the gist of what my life has been like. And while I'm usually worried that my life is too dull to write about, I know that's not the case this time.

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