What Happens in the Back of the House

"Work hard, play harder." "8-5 is for suckers!" "You should never calculate your salary by dividing the hours you work a week, you would be disappointed." "You should always be flexible, you will never have weekends off, and holidays are out of the question." "We value your work-life balance, but we also need you to be here."

You get the drift. These are just some of the examples right at the top of my head on this rainy November Sunday night in Oregon. I was thinking there for a minute, but so many words that were popping into my head, were definitely not for the audience to digest. If you have ever dipped your toes in the Hospitality industry, whether a resort front desk agent, a hotel room service server, a motel housekeeping manager, or a steak house bartender - you know what I am talking about. The hustle. The norm. The long hours and short staffed. The eating on the milk crate by the stink of the dishwasher (when time allows, which is for about 3 minutes.) The off-the-clock feeling that is so relieving that you go all out at a bar and probably puke on the sidewalk (but you would probably do it again.)

It was not until I briefly stepped out of the hotel and restaurant world, that I recognized how toxic my work life was, and how that affected my personal life, and my mental health. We endure so much stress we don't even recognize stress anymore, we only acknowledge the gain after the pain.

What pain? The pain of being yelled at by VIPs, for not properly cooking their steak to well-done. The pain of being yelled at by the chef, for ordering such a thing (the well-done steak). The pain of cutting labor and resources, but expected to receive no less than 5 stars on guest surveys. The pain of not being able to see your child or puppy for 1 4 hours straight, and not having the energy to fully be there for them when you get home.

The gain? I can simply say the adrenaline, the high after accomplishing such as crazy day. The acceleration of the career, and the jet-setting lifestyle (if we were lucky.)

I vividly remember, I was volun-told to be a part of a work-life balance committee for our organization. in 2017, I was 36, and at the time I was slightly confused about why this committee was important. That was how invisible the work-life balance concept was to some people! I never even advocated it for myself, and I secretly judged those who so strongly desired it. "You are in the hospitality industry! You chose this, so you better get on the train!"

That, my friends, is the status quo of the Hospitality industry. 8 hours work-day is a joke, and you are not encouraged and cheered on with admiration for going home early because you got your shit done, on top of that...everyone is competing to be the last person out the door. A lot of time, we could not practice what we preach. Here is a great example: it was my day off but I was "strongly advised" to show up for the "mandatory" work-life balance committee meeting. Can you imagine the impact these mentalities have on one's well-being?

The toughest part, is no one else dares to talk about it. Or at least when I did, I was told that as a leader, I should not complain about how horrifying my living condition was in the employee housing and that I should be thankful I was offered a place to live. I could have also blamed it on my ethnicity, but that is another story to tell on a later discovery.

Long before I started my hospitality career, I knew I was born to serve. This might sound crazy, but what I meant was that I have always known that my life has a deeper purpose than just living. Maybe that was why I never fit in with the crowd my own age, because what they love doing had no meaningful impact for me at the time. But now, as I serve in a completely different industry and clientele, I realize every single industry has its challenges, perhaps the same challenges we had back in hotel life. But the impacts are somehow much more severe, and I still see my hospitality friends struggle to be happy and successful at the same time.

That is when this dawned on me. When is someone going to stand up and challenge the status quo? When is someone going to talk about the intense workforce's overall wellness? When we say, we should treat guests exactly as how we expect to be treated, do we really mean that? It is no wonder that the workforce is so limited! At this mental wellness-driven world in 2023, hospitality is not a career that a college graduate would choose, let alone someone who has briefly dabbled in this sector. Hospitality has to completely reinvent the working environment it offers, and the first step is to break the status quo.

It is time we start serving those who serve others.

(Original post: https://www.yushinewellness.com/post/the-status-quo-of-hospitality-industry)