In the Arena: Overcoming Resistance

I meant to write this two weeks ago. I had just got done listening to Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art for the 12th time and had an entire outline of not just this piece but, an entire series on overcoming resistance; learning to be fearless( a title I got from Curtis Jackson’s Hustle Harder, Hustle Smarter); and my beliefs on the Law Of Attraction. I went into my office, opened up my MacBook, and typed out the first line that went like this: Growing up, I always enjoyed stories of heroes, but none more so than those of underdogs. And just like that, I tossed the whole project out. I shut my MacBook, walked back into my bedroom, and turned on the TV. Just like that, I had been bested by my long-time frienemy and rival, myself.

It wasn’t me necessarily who deterred me from writing this thing I knew in my heart of hearts that so many people today needed to read. If you ask Mr. Pressfield, he’d tell you it was Resistance! The archnemesis to all artists, athletes, aspiring entrepreneurs, and every other mortal being that walks the earth that never finishes what he or she sets out to do. It goes by many names and many faces. Most of us know it as Doubt, Lack of Resources, and a bad Social Placement. If you’re me, you’ll recognize it as your fear of inadequacy( or more likely your wife wanting to test out an old wives theory or your dog/cat needing a long overdue stint of attention). Whatever name you call it, resistance is a complete and utter bitch! It is also the sole reason you should keep on fighting!

I’m not going to try and blow smoke up your ass and tell you that if you keep battling resistance, everything you’ve ever wanted in life will fall into place. That there is pure fiction, I should know, that’s my genre. I will tell you that if you don’t get back in the ring and duke it out, you’ll never have the chance to find out. Think about it, how many awe-inspiring creations now exist today. From electric-powered cars, watches you can call people from, and underwater tunnels that connect the UK to mainland Europe! Now think what would have happened if the people who came up with the idea for these insane creations or hell, the people who helped build and fund them caved in and decided, “It’s not possible! I can make this happen! I can’t do this job today”, we’d still be hiding in caves hoping that an 800 lb Dire wolf isn’t hungry enough to come to grab its mid-day meal.

My time in the US Army taught me many things. Many, I wish I could forget. Many I have forgotten, and many that have been an integral part of my everyday life. Two of the lessons that stand out the most are this: 1) If you’re breathing, you can still fight, and 2) Pain(and resistance) is temporary. And here’s a third, anything riddled with adversity is worth doing. These are just three little nuggets of the Everest that was my indoctrination into the machine that is the United States Military. Ones I often wish I was wise enough to internalize my entire career. If a task was easy, so easy anyone could do it… this is where I’m supposed to say anyone would, but that would be false. No one would do it! If you want proof of that statement, go to your local Wal-Mart and watch how many people pick up an item, realize they don’t need it and put it back on a shelf completely on the other side of the store. I once worked in an upscale building in the heart of Charlotte, North Carolina. After having a conversation with the manager of the Sanitation crew, I was given an amazing insight. Now, for those of you who get your blood boiling over the topic of immigration, no matter what side you stand on, bear with me. I’m about to share a little secret with you. The manager and I were having a conversation about cleaning bathrooms. Having worked at Wendy’s in my teenage days, I had a few horror stories to tell. Nothing compared to the hideous experiences he and his team had come across. In utter disgust at some of the things he told(and showed me), I blurted out, “To Hell with that man, why on earth are you doing this?” He looked at me with a look of amusement and told me, “ I was lucky enough to be born here, just like you. But many of them[his team] are illegal. Back home they were poor and didn’t have many opportunities. Here, they get paid a decent wage and get benefits for jobs that no one else truly wants. Jobs that are either too dirty, too backbreaking, or just of no interest to most. They don’t need a degree, they don’t even need to speak English. You come in, do the job, and that’s it, you’re done! You only have to put in the work till the bell rings.” That right there floored me! I had never in my wildest dreams thought such a simple conversation could have such a profound impact on me, one I feel to this day.

You may have noticed in my title, another aspect of battling resistance: Getting in the Arena. One of my personal heroes is the late president, Theodore Roosevelt. To me, that man is the total embodiment of overcoming resistance. Throughout his life, Roosevelt encountered resistance on a level that today would utterly destroy a person. From a young age, he was constantly tested, whether by poor health, the death of both wife and mother at the same time, the raising of his children, or by the responsibilities of leading a still fractured and growing nation. Teddy took it upon himself to lace up his gloves and every day, get in the arena and meet resistance, blow for blow. His tenacity and will of iron are traits everyone could benefit from emulating.

Bruce Lee has been quoted saying, “Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”. Life as many of us know is harsh and often unfair. Circumstances often push us into places of extreme discomfort, whether they be physical, mental, social, or most certainly emotional. That is just the nature of the world. However, that does not have to be how you experience the world. I have my own saying of “it can only get worse”, and yes, I’m aware that it goes against the original saying of “it can only get better”. In my experience, it was never the circumstances that made anything better, but more often than not, how those involved chose to handle it. I used this saying most( to the annoyance of many of my squadmates) during the most difficult times in my military service. Situations never seemed to change for the better, it took the combined efforts of all those involved to bring about a more advantageous outcome. Like I said at the beginning of this little rant of mine, I’m not saying everything will fall in place all at once. I am not saying life will be any easier. I am saying that if you get in the arena and duke it out with the resistance you are facing in your life, eventually you will develop toughness and an unstoppable force that will give you the ability to overcome all obstacles along this uncomfortable road we call life.