What Would You Buy If You Had to Spend $10,000 Today?

Challenge Prompt: Write a humorous piece in the form of an apology that gradually reveals a situation the speaker is responsible for, growing more complicated as it goes.

For this challenge I am responding to the title question exactly as written, 'If you received $10,000 and had to spend it today, what would you buy?'

A follow up question is, 'What topic could we spend hours talking about?'

First of all - apologies to my husband for talking about him here! And there and everywhere!

Let me start with this explanation of what the cards do to my husband of twenty-one years.

Hubby and I pull an occasional card from this deck of cards I gave him several years ago for Christmas. He doesn't like these cards as he feels like he ends up having to look at his character defects too often and he has to apologize too much for them!

The cards will last us until one of us is dead, even though we should be able to finish them in a short time. It is only 100 cards. On one side 100 playful questions and on the other side 100 thoughtful. I thought they would be a great time. He would not open this gift! That is the difference between us.

So, to apologize, he will give me my way with the cards if I can catch him at the right moment.

This morning we laughed and laughed about the first question, when spending the $10,000. First thing he said, "Now, what can I buy my wife!" He barely got wife out when the laughter began. Now, we both know that would not be the first thing he would be thinking if he had $10,000 to spend today.

So, we laughed some more!

Then he said, "I would buy a Can Am Ryker." And I said, it is more than that isn't it? And he said, "Well, yes, I would probably have to get a used one." Again, I laughed and said, not hardly!

He would go new, as he is always saying, "I don't want someone else's headache. You never know if they beat the hell out of the machine or not. Very seldom can he fool me now after being together 25 years.

As we were talking, he looked at me like an apology was coming. Then I moved on to the next question.

When I sat down to type I realized I didn't say how I would spend $10,000 if I had to spend it today. I then thought I would give each of our seven children $1,000. Not all of them need it, but fair is fair.

Then I thought, well, I couldn't give our one daughter struggling with addiction 1,000. So, we would have to buy her some things for her $1,000. Then hubby and I would each have 1,500. to spend. I wasn't sure how I would spend my share, but I was thinking about what our house needs.

Then I started to laugh. He didn't even ask me how I would spend the money today. So, I went to tell him as he was shaving. Again, he looked like he might apologize for not asking and at the same time, he was busy shaving and I was interrupting his shaving. A distraction.

Another apology look from both of us. And we laughed.

What topic could we spend hours talking about?

He said almost right away - recovery. My husband stopped drinking for five years over forty years ago. However, he relapsed for a couple of years and has now been in recovery for 35 years.

My experience with recovery started in 1978, in the family program. I was there for two years before being asked to have an assessment in family treatment.

What I remember the assessor saying is that I could feel free to go to AA. That probably isn't what he said, but that is how I remember it, now 45 years later. I had agreed to not drink or use drugs during family treatment, so I said, "I'm not drinking. I don't need to go to AA!"

Now, we talk about the chip he pulled last night. Self-pity on one side of the chip and thankfulness on the other. They are what we get to work on today. Being grateful to not be stuck in self-pity as we once were, and that we can slip back into if we are not working on recovery.

He put that chip in especially for me, when I said, I don't think I need to work on the chips you have in there, so put one in for me. Early in recovery my sponsor had me write a gratitude list and I couldn't think of one thing I was grateful for. Now, I could go on to fill a book.

I learned from someone else that the gratitude list is meant for when we are feeling sorry for ourselves. Even though that was many years ago, I still do a gratitude list. No apologies for that. He thought he was funny when putting that one in that I started back in 1978.

For the most part apologies are minimal. But there are occasional looks that say I'm sorry! We both hate saying I'm sorry. I give him a kiss on the cheek, or say you know what I have to make amends for right? When he says yes, that is the end of that.

He will sputter and stutter his way through an I'm...ahh... sor..ry!