Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Humor.
The First 100 Days Of The Circus
Can you hear Britney Spears in your head? I think from coast to coast, from country to country, everybody is hearing old Britney belt out a round of "Oops!.;..I did it again." All some of us can think about is why he was our best choice. That is, of course, if you can take the time to think about it. I'm still smarting because my choice didn't win. Write-ins never do.
By Jason Morton2 years ago in Humor
Restore America's Health Again - Unveiling the 5 GreatestThreats
Curious readers, patriots, and fellow skeptics of the official narrative, it's time to expose the forces threatening the health and freedom of every American. Forget what your doctor, the CDC, or "science" tells you - here are the real forces behind the unprecedented decline in our nation's health.
By Scott Christenson🌴2 years ago in Humor
When You See a Sign, Follow Where It Memes
Hey, there! I'm.... _______Lightning Bolt⚡ 👋😁⚡ This is a Brand-New January 31st, 2025 edition of Meme-ing Madness! I worked especially hard to pull all this crap together for you. There were cats in my way. There is terrible heartbreak to deal with. There are currently virtually no Diablo sauce packets in the house. I think I may have solved the mystery of the Big Bang... and nobody wants to hear about it.
By Lightning Bolt ⚡2 years ago in Humor
Steve the Monkey: Rollerblades, Hotdogs, and Complete Chaos
Dave was your average guy in a small, quiet town. He had a decent job at the local hardware store, a predictable routine, and a somewhat underwhelming social life. But one day, as he was flipping through the local classifieds, something caught his eye.
By Jason “Jay” Benskin2 years ago in Humor
A Plate of Chicken & Sides: Before vs. After Plating (Spoiler: It’s the Same Sad Food, Just Fancier). AI-Generated.
Before: The Reality (a.k.a. “Depression on a Plate”) Picture this: You’ve roasted a chicken breast. It’s drier than your inbox after a dating app binge. Your “garlic mashed potatoes” are lumpier than a 2003 Nokia phone. And the green beans? Let’s just say they’ve seen better days—like 20 minutes ago, in the freezer. You plop it all on a plate with the enthusiasm of a sloth on melatonin. Bon appétit!
By Anna-Maria2 years ago in Humor
Title: "The Clock That Counted Backwards
In the small town of Willowbrook, there was a legend about an old clock that hung in the town square. It wasn’t just any clock—it was said to count **backwards**. No one knew where it came from or who made it, but everyone knew one thing: if the clock ever stopped, something terrible would happen.
By Killing Mission 2 years ago in Humor
Shits to Fucks
Shits to Fucks: The Definitive Guide to Quantifying Life’s Burdens Disclaimer: This piece is meant for humorous and satirical purposes. No offense is intended—it is loosely based on a question my husband asked me when I used one of the terms, and he asked for a conversion table for clarification. Please read with a sense of humor!
By Xine Segalas2 years ago in Humor
Wasting Light
Emberfield was a town that was forever stuck in the middle of a sunset. The sun, having clearly gone through some sort of existential crisis, refused to properly set, flickering on and off like a busted streetlight. If you tried to catch a good sunset photo, you’d get something that looked like a toddler trying to paint with one crayon: a half-baked attempt that made everyone question their life choices.
By Jason “Jay” Benskin2 years ago in Humor
The Toothpaste Tragedy
Rafiq was not a morning person. In fact, he was the opposite—a certified, card-carrying member of the "Do Not Disturb Before 10 AM" club. Unfortunately, life didn’t care about his sleep schedule, and today, he had an early morning class. So, at 7:30 AM, still half-asleep, he dragged himself out of bed like a zombie and stumbled toward the bathroom.
By Mirhadi Tahsin2 years ago in Humor
