Humor logo

- Eyes -

No 'Ai's' Here

By Jay KantorPublished about a year ago 3 min read
Author Original 'Schtick' Art © KantorKreationsKolections

-Eyes of the Beholder: The 'Ayes' Have it-

Peculiar? I was always attracted to Women that 'Pout' - Upper Lip Squiggle Style. The "Hey you Lookin' at Me" 'Tude! Cute to me - can't even imagine why?

- ODDITIES ~ PEEVES -

What attracts you to the Opposite Sex, or the 'Neutral' Sex, for that matter — Or TurnOffs — we all have them.

Ok, I'll start: Along with being 'Pouty' I like Women that have 'Grace'. I know it's not an often used description these days, but just a soft-smile (and maybe a wink) will do it for me, not much more. Oh, and of course, a quick-wit

Authors © Own - Grace~Charm~'Tude

Men are often told 'I'm up here' since their eyes instantly land on a woman's chest at 1st glance; hence the Boob man: There are men who are experts in this not-so-subtle obsession; you ladies do cleavage-dress to attract though.

Some are Tush peekers. Ah, the ass-men among us who just can't resist turning around for that last look; especially with those who wear yoga pants. Then, there's me: I'm an 'Eye-Man' 1st and foremost - no matter the color or shape that's my 'turn-on.' So much can be told through eye expressions - often they can speak louder than mere words.

— Perhaps Love? Anyone experienced Love at 1st Sight? —

We met by luck at the .25 Cent car wash - probably not a quarter anymore? It is such a vivid memory: I was on my knees with a white plastic-tip Tiparillo cigar between my teeth (cool at the time) and no shirt while polishing my 'Mag' wheels. I looked up to see this incredibly lovely hot sight. A Woman wearing a 'Spaghetti-Strap' Sundress so transparent that I just couldn't stop staring at the sun~soaked freckled vision with my little cigar hanging from my lip ~ Let the Sunshine in ~

Perfect imperfection: She had two noticeably different colored eyes - Blueish and Brownish/with golden specks. Saying people rarely look into your eyes anyway - she would wear cleavage-clothes to prove that point.

There she was, I knew she was my 'IT' from that glance. I know, my bad, Mr. Shallow. She pulled up right next to my car. Although different colors we had identical Twin Chevy's, a sure conversation starter. She started talking to me first. My staccato words could only stutter out in awe while just looking at her. The automatic "Eyes-Up-Here" response should have kicked in, but a Mr. 'Eye Man' girl parts exception was taken this time...!

Rita Louise didn't have tattoos; not popular at the time. I have to admit not a big fan of tats. Some, no problem, but color-slathered all over the body-arms-neck - Good Needle Hurt? I just don't get it? No matter how it's explained and often rationalized to me from 'individual' statements as permanent tributes! Of course 'Dress-Code' is just a dinosaur expression these days.

In my youth, I navigated braces/with rubber bands. But, as an avid kisser, I now have trouble with attached lip metal ring-loops blocking the way to a woman's Kisser: probably an evasive shiny 'hint' to have me keep my distance.

I just wanted to think about that again ~ Now I have.

I once dated a High School Cheerleader who was also the Counter-Girl at Kinney Shoe Store, where Twin-Lar and I were Salesmen - Our 1st exposure to the 'Sales-Schmooze-Technique.'

She was SO cute, but she was gym-shower-shy after all of the 'Pom-Pom-Sweaty' games: I told her I was busy on game days! But, nothing shy about her in class. She never wore a bra {probably on perky purpose?} I let her look down at my papers and she let me look down her blouse; fair exchange. Well, the teacher said, Quote: "What are you both looking at" and Downgraded both of us. I'm Lovin' That Memory!

Favorite Expressions—We all have them:

- Some of the greatest conflicts are not between two people but between one {1} person - Ourselves.

- Advantage Old Age: You can compliment a Lady and she accepts it as just that..!

- Eyes shout what the lips are often afraid to speak ~ Silence can tell you secretly everything.

— Don't "POUT" About It —

Jay Kantor, Chatsworth, California

'Senior' Vocal Author - Vocal Village Community -

Family

About the Creator

Jay Kantor

'For The Kids Someday'

Enjoyed the story? Support the Creator.

Subscribe for free to receive all their stories in your feed.

Subscribe For Free

Reader insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment
    Written by Jay Kantor