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Women's Suffrage

Real talk, real issues.

By Phoenixx Fyre DeanPublished 5 years ago 8 min read
Girl power! 

Today, I want to talk about women’s suffrage. No, I’m not talking about men, I said suffrage, not suffering.

Women had no rights until 1839 when the Custody of Infants Act was passed. That gave women the right to petition the court for custody of children seven and younger and for the right to visit their older children. Until the Custody of Infants Act, custody of the children resulting from that union was always given to the father. Always! Think about that one for a minute.

One sunny day in Seneca Falls, New York, a group of unsatisfied housewives decided they should have more rights, thus began the women’s suffrage or women’s rights movement. It was this push for rights that led to a woman’s right to vote. I’m sure society has many opinions about this very subject and because I seem to be a menace to your society anyway, how about I just go ahead and tell the truth about it?

Women got the right to vote and this country went to hell. There. I said it. If you are a woman, you just cussed at my mama for birthing me. If you are a man, you just agreed with me and fell in love. Stick with me here. It gets better!

A woman’s place is in the kitchen. Now fellas, don’t get cocky here. When I say “kitchen,” I mean home. There was a time, believe it or not, when men filled the factories and fields and women stayed home and took care of their babies! They cooked every meal. They washed every stitch of clothing. They homeschooled their children or spent real time with their children working on homework and being involved in their education. They put the kids to bed. They put their husband to bed. When she was finished with that, she went to sleep herself. The next morning, she was up before her husband and would make his breakfast and coffee before work and then do it all again.

It sure sounds exhausting. As a woman that subscribes to this ideology, I can assure you that it is exhausting. It is hard work that never stops. The payoff was huge, though. She served breakfast, lunch and dinner and the family table. Everyone ate together, and everyone knew mama would have dinner on the table at six o’clock, sharp. She laid eyes on her family, and she talked to them! Imagine that! She always knew exactly what her children were wearing, no matter where they may roam. She was able to accomplish this feat because 50 t-shirts were as absurd then as it is now. Education was important, and women knew exactly what their children were learning. She tucked her children in to bed every night and after a busy day of dividing her attention, each child got a precious moment alone with mama.

Ok men, turn off your ears for a minute. This is just for the ladies. Ladies let’s talk this through, shall we? Would it kill you to get up and make your husband coffee and breakfast before he goes to work? Perhaps pack his lunch? Some awesome stuff happens in the wee hours of the morning before the kids wake up! Make his coffee and his bacon and send him out the door with a kiss. Sweep the floor and tidy the house. Serve him a hot meal when he gets home and when he sits down, serve him first. Yes. You heard me correctly. I said serve him before the kids. Make sure he gets the first plate with the biggest piece of meat. This is going to teach your children that dad is to be respected. He is the one that provides, and he will be served first at all times. His role is important and invaluable to giving your child a firm grasp of the realities of what it takes to provide for them. After the children have been served, from youngest to oldest, then if there is anything left, mama will eat. Now settle down, I know you are angry that I dare say you should feed your husband before your children. If there is not enough food to eat, of course the kids will eat first. The normal practice should always be to feed the man of the house first. Most of the time what you are going to find is a grateful man. He will see the things you do for him, and he will respond in kind. Besides ladies, when you do things like that, it makes him wonder what the hell you are up to and he lives in fear! Either way, you have a well-behaved husband and life is so much easier for everyone involved.

Ok fellas, you can rejoin us now. Women needed more rights than what they had, of that, I am certain. Women were, prior to 1839, considered chattel, or property of her husband. We aren’t property and can’t be owned by anyone, but do we need to focus on doing anything a man can do? Do women need to take on the world and conquer it? Should women be enlisted in armed forces and should they be allowed to join special forces teams? Does a woman need to be president? I answer an emphatic and resounding NO to those questions. Ladies, if you want to make an impact on the world, have an impact on the future of our world and invest in your children! Instead of chasing the dollar, why not put that energy into making sure that your children have everything they need to get through life? We have become a society that is obsessed with things. Inanimate objects have become what we strive for. Sure, staying at home and raising your children means you don’t have an extra income. The truth is, you only want the income so that you can buy more things. Your family could live comfortably in a smaller house. You choose to live in a big one because it holds more things. The new cars have all the bells and whistles and the next-door neighbor has one, so you need to work to make sure your neighbor never thinks he or she is better than you. That’s the deciding factor in modern society. You are judged the moment you enter a room by the clothing you have on, the shoes you wear and the way you keep your hair. We judge an entire household based on the same things. My family is one that is always judged negatively and immediately. My husband is six feet, four inches tall. He has long hair, a long bushy beard and he has tattoos all over his body. To glance at him, you would think he was fresh out of prison and up to no good, simply because of the way that he looks. The reality is that my husband is a retired Assistant Fire Chief with 20 years of service and sacrifice. That wasn’t enough though, he became an EMT in his “spare” time. He is the sweetest and most giving man one could ever hope to meet, and most will never know because the assumption has been made and people steer clear of him. If you knew him, you would find a man that genuinely cares about your well being and would sacrifice his own life, without forethought, for you. Instead of him being celebrated he’s been demonized by people who would never get the chance to see the superhero that he is, instead replacing the real life good guys for the “superhero” Hollywood has presented us. Even acceptable superheroes have been affected by the lack of parental guidance in today’s society!

Our mama’s used to dress us up and take us to the parades that welcomed home our military. We went to church and made family a priority. Television was limited to Saturday morning cartoons and the occasional after-school or Charlie Brown special. We had a game system and a computer in our home, but we didn’t spend any significant time on either and the time we did spend on it almost always had to be earned. Sundays in my house were always the most fun. My father cut power to the house every Sunday morning, before the kids got out of bed. We went to church and came home for a big meal or stopped at the Chinese buffet on the way home. When we arrived at home, everyone changed clothes and we went out as a family unit. We may have only gone to the pasture to walk the fields or ride the horses. Sometimes, we stayed in the house and played board games but whatever we did, we did together. We laughed. We talked. We dreamed. We did it together.

That is what I feel is missing in society today. Mom being a respected position in this world has fallen to the lowest of the low with comments like “I can’t believe you don’t have a job” or my personal favorite, “why would you make everything your family eats from scratch when you can buy it already cooked.” This is where women’s suffrage has done the world no favors. We, as women, suddenly had the desire to be outside of the home. We decided, as a whole generation of people, to take the easy way out with our families and spend all of our time and energy on making money. We forgot our roles and why they are important.

My generation gave birth to the faces that wish to run our country now. That’s right. We are responsible. In our quest to “never need a man,” we sacrificed passing on our morality to our children for that of the writers of whatever television program they couldn’t live without. We enrolled our kids in school at two or three-years old-and then ran off to work and allowed the school system to raise our kids. We allowed the government of these United States to teach our children how to be productive and upstanding members of society. It became easier to just give them what they wanted and get back to work. Then, because we need to be number one in all things, we started to work all day and bring our work home with us at night. We started dropping by McDonald’s for dinner instead of cooking because there was so much work to be done.

Dad? Who had time for dad? Dad was perfectly capable of taking care of things on his own. This is what we taught our children. Dad doesn’t matter. Dad doesn’t deserve nearly as much respect as Mom does! This is a societal problem and it's become far to common and acceptable to depict the “normal” household with a smoking hot, independent, all-knowing and all-seeing woman with super human warrior abilities and zero emotion and the fat, ignorant, over-emotional, weak, lazy husband that messes everything up and is to be laughed at. There was a time that the words “wait until your father gets home” had meaning. Now it is commonplace to see men cowering with the children in the corner and using a Mr. Milker vest to nurse the new baby.

This is where we went wrong. Women got the right to vote and “more” became the focus. We have a voice ladies, and we should use it. Just at a lower decibel level and with a lot less man-hating. And may I suggest using it from the kitchen while you are preparing your family dinner?

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About the Creator

Phoenixx Fyre Dean

Phoenixx lives on the Oregon coast with her husband and children.

Author of Lexi and Blaze: Impetus, The Bloody Truth and Daddy's Brat. All three are available on Amazon in paperback format and Kindle in e-book format.

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    Phoenixx  Fyre DeanWritten by Phoenixx Fyre Dean

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