Why Is It Not Easy To Find Women On Tinder Wanting To Live A Child-Free Life?

Alright, I know it’s mostly used for hookups and quick flings, that sort of thing. I’ve been there and done that. Times change and we age, don’t we?

I’ve been wanting to date a woman who wants a childfree life as I do. Also a woman with no kids of her own.

Yes, I want to live a childfree life for many reasons. I’ve accepted the fact that I am not hard-wired to nurture another human being. It’s just too much pressure and too many challenges there for me. There are also my mental health issues, and finally, I want to do my part for Mother Earth. I’ve taken a lot from her, and I want to give back. As you see, there are reasons.

As an introvert, I lost hope of meeting someone nice like extroverts do. You know, out in the daylight among other humans around you.

Apps like Tinder are saviors for introverts. To be honest, dating apps come in handy. You can filter out people based on your preferences before meeting them. How lovely.

I’ve been looking for a serious relationship, and so I’ve clearly stated, among other preferences, that I am looking for a woman who wants to be childfree. I’ve also written down my reasons for the same.

I do see a few profiles with a liking for a child-free life. Being a man looking to date a woman with a specific condition, I don’t often get likes. The women have to like me, my location, my job, yada yada yada.

Okay, there were a total of 21 matches in the past 3 months. Yeah, I counted them for you. The matches were made only after the condition was met. Most of us chat with the matched person after getting a match, don’t we?

I do the same thing, chat. Everything goes really well until the topic of being childfree comes along. Most women ask me why I don’t like kids. I mean, come on, I teach kids. I love them, but only from a distance and for 45 minutes. That’s enough. I’ve dealt with hundreds of kids that way, and I am more than happy to keep doing it for the rest of my life. Thank you very much.

Then, the next question women ask me is, “What if I change my mind after starting a relationship?” I won’t. I don’t have the slightest intention of fathering a kid. I might even consider going for a vasectomy very soon. I have also said that I hate passing on my genes and that I have suffered enough with my anxiety and depression issues and didn’t want to put my son or daughter through it. Passing on my genes will be the biggest sin that I will ever commit in this life.

Let the sleeping dogs lie.

When I ask them the same questions, they are like, “Well, right now it seems to be the best option for me, but who knows, I might change my mind.” And I was like, “Come on, I’ve displayed my needs in my profile in uppercase letters, and still, you want to try your luck.”

I ended up meeting a few women, five to be precise, who said they were up for a childfree life, and some even had good enough reasons like mine. I was jumping up and down with happiness before every date.

On the date, one lady says, “I know kids are trouble and all, but who will take care of you when you get old?” I said I am not taking care of my parents now. No kid is obliged to do that. Our parents chose to have us and raise us. Raising humans needs lots of money, patience, and a hell of a lot of time. They chose it, and I can’t help it. I have enough problems with myself, passed on by my parents and my ancestors. How about that?

I was not asked to be born to them in this life. My consent wasn’t needed, and yet here I am after living 36 yummy years on this planet. So, no, I don’t expect anyone to take care of me when I get old. I am prepared to die alone, with or without a partner near me.

On another date with another lady, She goes, “Right now, I am not interested in having kids, but who knows?” What if I get pregnant accidentally? What if I get baby fever? What if my sister gets pregnant before me? What if I have to die alone? I am like, “What if you let me foot the bill and not see you again?”

If you get pregnant accidentally, let’s find a way to free yourself from the burden. If you get baby fever, try paracetamol, maybe. If your sister gets pregnant, I’d wish her good luck with her little bundle of forever responsibilities. Everyone dies, and after you die, life will still go on for others in this world. Don’t think too much about yourself. You are just a speck of dust in the grand scheme of things. Chill out.

On my third date with another woman, she says, “What will you do with no kids around?” How will you spend your time? Won’t you feel bored?

I was like, “Are you serious?” There are limitless pros to not having kids. Kids cost money, insane amounts of it. Do you have it? I do, but I have other plans for it. It’s estimated that to raise a kid, one would have needed $230,000 in 2013. I am not sure about the figures in 2020. Kids need constant attention and care, otherwise, they will turn into rotten beings in every way before long. Then there are issues with their attitudes. As a teacher, I am unable to tackle them for a few hours a day. It’s beyond my imagination how their parents are able to deal with them on a daily basis. I will kill myself or my kid, and go to jail.

Choosing to not have kids is one of the sanest decisions I’ve ever made. I know this because I also know its consequences, and I see it every day around me in different forms and shapes.

I can do what I want with my partner. I can take trips when I want. I don’t have to constantly overthink my kids’ futures as I am already overthinking mine, and that’s because I am an overthinker by birth. I will be able to save so much money that I will be able to retire much earlier than I had planned before.

There are so many humans populating the earth. Like rats in an unkempt underground drainage system, So, no. Thank you very much. I can also focus on my spiritual journey at my own pace. I can take up hobbies even when I am 45 or 50 without having to worry about being selfish. Listen, I do not have a kid. It’s not born yet, and it will not be born. So, I am not being bad or evil or wicked or selfish in any way.

There are people who should not have kids but still have them and suffer big time. I am not like them. This has severe overall devastation on all levels of wellbeing for them and their children — physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. They end up carrying it to their next lives and suffering there as well. This is why we have to listen to our guts and take decisions without giving a f**k about what others think. So you can be safe, happy, and satisfied in this life and beyond.

So, ideally, from my experience looking for women who want a childfree life, I can only conclude, for now, that most women are still indecisive about what they want out of life in this regard. There’s a dilemma, confusion, fear, insecurity, peer pressure, shame, guilt, and so on.

That’s all fine. I am not the one to judge anyone’s opinions and preferences. It’s just that, despite hearing and learning that a large majority of humans are starting to choose to be childfree and feeling really happy about it, I embarked on this online dating journey. I am lost and disappointed so far. I am aware that there are many more dating apps and FB groups where one could meet similar-minded people. I just wanted to throw some light on my dating experience and how it went. Cheers.

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