The Unsouled

It seemed like an eternity since my limbs felt this light, the familiar ache of pain now absent. I stretched my lips into a grin, feeling like I could smile forever. Fatigue was replaced with a tingling warmth caressing my skin. The magic of the atmosphere lulled my weary body to sleep.

Oh no. Panic clawed up my spine. I’m still dead.

I heard shuffling to my side, followed by a low voice deliberating aloud. “Do I wake her up? Or should I let her sleep? Oh! But I’m too excited to get started!”

Suddenly, I felt a presence by my ear. “Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey!” yelled a high-pitched voice.

Startled, I sat up coming face to face with a white jelly-like creature staring at me with expressively wide, colorless eyes.

“Did I scare you? Is that not what humans say to each other to wake them up?” The creature jiggled with each thought, blinking rapidly. I noticed a crystal embedded into the creature’s chest, dimming low with a soft light.

“Hello. Are—are you my Guide?” I heard of such things during my trials in limbo.

“Indeed I am, Guide 00009 at your service, and here to take you back to the wonderful land of the humans.” The creature then stuck out two jello-y stumps and shimmied them enthusiastically.

I really made it then...I passed the test. My fear transformed into excitement. I'm so close to going home, and that meant I could see my mom again!

“Congrats, not many people make it this far y'know.”

“Er… right. So how do I get home?” Not wanting to remember the horrid memories of what I endured, I instead looked around and was able to finally make sense of my surroundings.

A sea of rainbow reached out beneath me, spreading out for as far as my eyes could see. The vibrant meadow rolled in waves over grassy hills, embraced by a purple starless sky above.

“Excellent question M’Lady! First we need to find your soul. Once you find that, your wish will be granted. Then the all-powerful, magical gate appears, and you’re outta here! Easy as falling off a log!” The Guide vibrated happily before clapping its hands twice. Thousands of shelves appeared stretching on for miles.

How was I going to find my soul? Dread filled my chest weighing like a ton of bricks. “This is going to take forever. I’m never going to get home!” Better get started, then. I made my way down towards the shelves.

“Wait! Make sure you stay with me inside my ring of protection!” I stopped, and for the first time, noticed a slight ring of light surrounding the two of us.

“Uh, protect us from what exactly?” Shivering, the Guide’s white color turned slightly grey.

“From the Misguided. They are, uh, dark shadow beings that like to feast on light beings like me and you, but this crystal,” it pointed towards its torso where the crystal glowed, “protects us. Also, I’m your Guide silly! It’s my job to help you. Don’t worry, this is going to be like stealing candy from a baby. Although, I never understood why anyone would want to do that…” The jello creature trailed off, shifting back to its original color and jiggling with anticipation.

We made our way through some of the racks. The assortment of items ranged from teddy bears and small dolls to ornate mirrors and ashtrays, with everything in between. I noticed some of the items were broken. “What’s wrong with these?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” the Guide said simply. I looked at the jagged edges of the victorian mirror. I noticed my barrette was missing, but I was too tired to care. I continued walking with the Guide.

"We’re here! Your soul should be in this aisle...I can feel it!”

“So, will I just know it’s my soul?”

“You’ll know it more than anything.”

I looked up and down the shelves, eventually turning towards the jello creature as he stood to the side awkwardly, both stubs behind its back. Just behind the creature, I could see the edges of something glittery… my barrette?

“Uh, any luck yet?” The Guide asked.

“Is that my barrette?’

“You know, you just have to close your eyes and breathe in—”

Turning my head to the side I could now see my barrette wedged between its pudgy hands.

“That is my barrette!”

The white blob stilled trying desperately to hide the accessory, laughing awkwardly. "What! Me? Steal? Preposterous! Absolute blasphemy—"

"I can literally see it there,” I interrupted, “you're holding it behind your back."

The white blob turned gray and vibrated violently. "Oh! You caught me red handed!" It looked at me, it’s colorless eyes staring deep into my brown ones. It seemed to be rocking back and forth, as if shifting from one foot to another. "Well… can I have it?"

"What! No, give it back."

"What if I said please?"

"No!"

With a dramatic silence the Guide held a jello-y finger out. "With a cherry on top?"

I sighed. “Okay, fine, you can have it, but you don’t have any hair—”

The Guide took the barrette and jammed it on the side of its head. The clip stuck out at an odd angle. It turned to look in the mirror and jiggled, changing to a light shade of pink.

I smiled, feeling a small pull in my chest. I looked to my left, towards the bottom shelf where a small, black book, from what felt like a lifetime ago, sat. I picked up its worn black binding, my hands skimming over the soft leather. I thumbed through the dotted pages of my and my mother’s writing, nostalgia washing over me.

“It’s your soul! And it’s a book, how fun!”

“And now I get to go home.” I whispered.

“Yeah….” I looked at the Guide and he looked dejected.

“How come you’ve never taken one of these for yourself and left this place for the human world?”

“Because it’s not mine...and don’t think I haven’t tried stealing it before.”

“You have?”

“Yeah…and I almost died!” I stared at the blob. It vibrated for a moment in thought. "Only beings with souls can leave this place. I don’t have one..."

"...because you're not human." I stated. The Guide clenched its pudgy fists, then its shoulders sagged with defeat.

"No," it whispered, "I'm not." Then it brightened again. "But I would make an excellent human! I'd be a hero! Oh, I'd accomplish so many things! If only I could convince the guardians of the gate." The Guide must have sensed my curiosity. "They're the ones who decide who gets to go to the human realm, and the only ones I know of who get to leave are the ones with soul." He shuffled again. "Hence me once trying to…um...steal it. It’s just…when you’re here for so long, all the memories start jumbling together. I wanted to remember you. You’ll be gone so soon...and I’ll be alone again.” The blob started shaking. “How come I can’t have a soul, too?”

My heart felt heavy for this soft creature. “How about I give you something else… a name besides ‘Guide’?"

The jello creature puffed out its chest and a name badge appeared. "Well technically, it's Guide 00009,” his shoulders once again sagged. "and we aren't allowed to have names. It’s seen as a human quality, and I’m but a cog in a machine here."

"How about a name with some human meaning, a secret between us friends?"

It vibrated gleefully. "Not gonna lie, I've secretly thought about this a lot, but could never decide! How would I choose?"

I contemplated a bit. “The same way you told me I’d know it’s my soul.” Despite this jello creature trying to steal my hair clip, haphazardly at that, I believed it deserved a good name. I rattled off some names I knew the meanings of.

"How about Chetan…Chetanjeet? Chetan for short. It means the spirit of life."

The jello brightened, turning a vibrant shade of yellow. His colorless eyes widened as they met mine. "I love it." he whispered.

I held out my hand. "Hello Chetan, my name is Roop."

He shook my arm vigorously. "Hello Roop, my name is Chetanjeet. Chetan for short. Holy cow! A secret! I'd totally make an awesome human!" The shelves disappeared and a greenhouse appeared about a mile away. “Time for your wish!” The wish that follows me into the human world.

“I wish for a bajillion dollars.” I held out my arms expectantly.

Chetan chuckled. “It doesn’t work like that, it has to be something you truly desire.” Did I not truly want a bajillion dollars? I thought hard. A number appeared in my head. The number that haunted both my mother and I—our debt.

“I wish for twenty-thousand dollars.” I whispered. A wad of cash appeared in my hands.

I desperately hoped that my mother could somehow hear me. I’m coming home and clearing our debt.

Chetan gently nudged my shoulder. “It’s time to go home.” The greenhouse appeared closer.

“Chetan, why do you want to be human?”

“I’m not sure what it’s like to be human. All the ones I’ve met that passed the trials had some ultimate purpose that pushed them to make it through, despite whatever brought them here. They saw setbacks as redirection. I don’t know my purpose yet, but this is my trial, and I feel like I’d make a good human...good enough to make it to the other side. I want that chance more than anything. ” We appeared at the greenhouse, where wild flowers pressed up against the glass. Chetan was rocking, looking anxiously at the structure. To be so close to what you want and not be able to have it...that must hurt more than anything.

"Alright! Here we are. Just place your palm on the door, and the gate should be inside."

"How about you come with me?" I blurted out.

The jello stared at me, eyes wide, mouth agape. "I—I can't. I'm not human." He stammered.

"I believe you're every bit of human as I am, and you deserve it. It's not fair to you. Come with me!"

He vibrated silently for a moment. "You… would take me with you?" I nodded, and Chetan brightened. "Yes! Okay! I’m actually doing this! I'm breaking out of here!" He turned a slightly red color, anxiety dripping off of him. I took his jello hands in mine and opened the door. We both entered, and immediately felt the presence of the gate, an open doorway filled with brilliant light, in the middle of the room. Chetan started at it like it was his lifeline.

A voice boomed from the side. "You know you're not allowed in here Unsouled. Leave now and let the human pass." Standing there was a Crystal Guardian.

"But I am human," Chetan yelled, "I know I am! I can feel it."

The Guardian moved so fast he blurred, leaning into Chetan's face. "Then where is your soul?" Blindingly quick, it shoved its arm into Chetan’s jello body, ripping out his light-core. "You brought this on yourself." Before my human mind and hand could comprehend or do anything, it vanished.

The ring of protection faded.

Chetan was fading.

He looked at me, pleading. "Run." Glowing, red eyes appeared everywhere, and shadows creeped up the walls as glass shattered around us.

Chetan shoved me towards the gate with what remained of his hand. His eyes gleamed with tears. "Thank you, Roop."

"I'm not leaving without you!" I looked at the twenty-thousand dollars and willed it to change. The wad slowly transformed into a light-core that shined brilliantly, its rays pulsing with an audible beat. Without a second thought, I shoved the light-core into Chetan’s jello body and hauled us both towards the gate, the Misguided on our heels.

I straightened Chetan’s barrette, then held him close.

And we jumped into the ethereal light.