The Things You'll Never Hear Me Say
Some things are better left unsaid... kept safe in my mind and heart.
The tears are finally falling... I didn't think I had it in me. I felt like I had felt all the hurt and let it go. But no, because the last time we talked you told me to not blame myself, to be strong, and keep pushing. How could I not blame myself?! I ignored my gut feelings because I saw something in you, if you were to ask me to explain I wouldn't be able to. As friends, we could have had a really solid bond. But you couldn't help yourself, could you? You just had to have more, and at what price? For you? Nothing. Me? Absolutely everything.
I can't stop the tears... god damn... I really can't. You lied to me; you used me, you belittled me. I remember loving how honest and blunt you were; you didn't hold back. I liked that because there aren't many honest people anymore. In the beginning, I forced myself to only see you as a friend, I told you I had recently gotten my heart broken and didn't want any of that, just a friend. Man, you were so persistent, you knew exactly what to say. As I write this, I feel like laughing my ass off for actually believing all the things you told me. I was damn foolish. The first time you held back I knew something was wrong, I was mad at myself for many reasons, but you broke me with the words you told me, I would have asked already. After, I learned to accept that and continued hanging out because I thought you were a calm person, and I enjoyed talking to you about anything. If things were too stressful at home, you were my escape. It wasn't 'til the last time we hung out that I realized how pathetic I looked. I was always available whenever you asked to hang out, didn't even bother thinking about it twice.
One thing I hope you know is that if you had respected the bounds, then things would've been different. Who knows, we could've been close and good friends. I hope you find happiness, but to be frank, I hope you one day get what you deserve. Cause never have I felt the pain you brought me. If you hadn't crossed my path, I would still have pieces of me, and I definitely wouldn't be writing this. Funny how you told me to be strong, to not blame myself when you never cared... I would've preferred the truth from the beginning than to go through this, but you stopped being honest and blunt when it was convenient for you.
About the Creator
Rey Dimayuga
Just a person who feels deeply and writes!
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