The Nice Guy

The Nice Guy

You know how it is, you finally meet the ‘nice’ one. The one that tells you they miss you; they are glad they met you and they can’t wait to see you again, only a few days later they are posting your underwear through your mum’s letterbox.

I met Dave* through (you guessed it) Tinder and he was the perfect gentleman to start off with. We went bowling for our first date where he was sweet, considerate and even held my hand on the walk home. We had another few dates and things got pretty full on very quickly. We were constantly texting, calling each other babe, sending love hearts etc and I was feeling like I had hit the jackpot! We had similar interests and he seemed like a decent bloke! Nice house, car, job etc (because that’s hard to come by now, am I right?)

Well, fast forward to the morning after our last date. We kiss goodbye, have another date set up for a couple of days away and I’m looking forward to it! I skip away to the gym, feeling really good about myself because I have finally found a straightforward, honest man – oh how wrong I was!

After saying goodbye, I barely hear from him and the next day is the same. I send him a cute message to say goodnight and get a very blunt ‘night’ in return. I ask, ‘everything ok?’ and I’m left on read all night. Now, you can ignore me and just not read my messages, but does anyone else feel a violent bubble of rage when they are left on read? So of course, in the morning I send him a humorous message asking him to stop being rude. His response? ‘This isn’t going to work out’. No explanation, no nothing.

I send a couple of messages asking him to let me know why, as I’m quite confused. All that is going through my head is ‘did I wear too much make up?’, ‘Was my dress too short?’ ‘am I not smart enough for him?’ And various other thoughts to that degree.

I ask him, can I come round and get my things from yours and we can chat? He says he is going to drop them round – that’s ok, we can have a little chat in the car as I need some closure. Nope! “I don’t want to talk about this to your face”.

WOW. It is at this point that I’m starting to feel like I have had a lucky escape. I have a go at him because I’m all about standing out for myself and stamping out rude behaviour. He finally says to me ‘You were a rebound’. Cool, that’s fine dude, but how hard was it to say that?

Today’s dating culture is so messed up that we can no longer tell people things to their face. I value honesty, and if I’m not feeling it with someone, I will tell them, if they ask why I will gladly tell them as every experience is a learning curve. Some people just don’t gel, or in the long term you don’t think you would have a lot in common with them. I personally think it is polite and respectful to give somebody closure, so that unlike me in this situation, they aren’t spending their time thinking, ‘what’s wrong with me?’.

So anyway, I tell him thank you and not to treat his next girl like how he has treated me, and 2 hours later I get an addressed envelope with my underwear inside posted through my mum’s door. At least he washed them.