The First Impression

It's been two years, three months and eighteen days. I have been so consumed in my work to allow myself to date, to feel vulnerable, to live. I haven't given it the slightest thought. My friends have been supportive. Trying to get me to go out for a drink here, a party there, to meet new people. I am a traditionalist. I like meeting people out in the world. I am one of those people who still admire someone dropping off a resume in person to create that first impression.

So my friends helped me make a dating profile. Not very traditional right? Their thoughts are that it is 2021 and people meet differently now. I felt totally out of my element with this process. Having to create a biography that is short and sweet, not rambling but to the point, something that will give the viewer a complete picture of who I am as an individual.

Here I am, swiping through profiles then I came across someone who really caught my attention. I swipe right and the screen lights up indicating that it was a match. Oh the anxiety I felt once that happened. I didn't know what to do next. Should I message him right away? How long should I leave it before it seems rude? Sipping my Merlot, I decided to just leave it at that. I would not dwell over a potential boy. I was better than that. I would be cool, calm and collected.

Suddenly I heard a ping. It was from him. I wasn't too sure why I was so excited and nervous. I took another sip of my wine, a deep breath then opened the message. It was a simple Hello, I like your profile. You seem like someone I would want to get to know. I smiled. How thoughtful yet plain. It wasn't a crude message nor was it boring. It was flattering and admiring.

This whole online dating thing was not something I thought I was going to use. The protocol was forgein to me. The social element seemed like a set back. How could I be able to get to know someone intimately through what I couldn't tell between the comfort or confines of my phone. Would there be that initial spark? Would I be able to accurately visualize him and not be disappointed? These questions raced through my mind.

We ended up talking for hours that night. Got to know each other through this forgein method I was getting used to. I learned he was a teacher; grade 10 English. I learned that he was the baby of three siblings; all sisters. The family was from a small town in the country. His parents are retired teachers who now travel the world; living the dream. I continued to pour another glass of Merlot, then another. Nothing to compromise my judgement and say something I would regret but enough to take the edge off in order to open up about myself.

Looking at the time on my phone and the empty bottle, I decided that this was as good a time as any to call it a night. We said our goodbyes and agreed to talk more tomorrow. I layed in bed in sheer awe that it was this easy to connect with someone.

We spent a week talking, getting to know each other and all the wondrous things that made us us. I learned he went to school for architecture and loves to partake in photography. He has a dog named Milo and jogs with him every morning.

Then he asked me the question I was waiting for. “Would you like to get dinner with me Saturday?” It made my heart feel so heavy yet my body was weightless. If he could have seen me I am sure he would have made fun of my face blushing.

It was a little restaurant on the east end of town. The reservation was under his name. I got there and was shown to our seat. The lights were dimmed and the atmosphere was rather romantic but not in your face romantic. The hostess left me at our table and assured me that the waiter would be there shortly. I checked my phone, 7:50. Okay, I thought, I am early. No big deal. We agreed to an eight o’clock dinner.

The time got closer to 8 and I was starting to get nervous. The waiter came around and asked me if I would like to start with something to drink. I wondered if it was rude to order myself a drink before my date arrived but then decided I needed something to take the edge off so I ordered a glass of Merlot. The dry yet fruitful flavour on my lips lingered for a few seconds before I bit my lip in anticipation.

A man enters, smiles and is ushered toward my table. He stops at the chair that is reserved for, I assume him, and pauses.

“Jennifer?” he questions

I awkwardly wave and confirm that it is I who he was to be meeting. I smiled and gestured to the chair across from me. He sits and apologizes for not getting here sooner. He orders a Tom Collins, a drink to demonstrate is masculinity. Gin was never my thing. I found it tasted like pine and I had a bad experience in college with it. Now if he had ordered vodka, there would be something to connect over.

The dinner was wonderful. He ordered the steak and baked potato while I had a shrimp alfredo pasta dish. He was polite, charming and funny. He lived up to the expectation I had in my mind of him. His eyes were softer than his photos gave them credit and his smile was a killer. I felt so at ease, so comfortable with a complete stranger; more comfortable than I have been in years.

We finished our meal and decided to take a walk past the boutiques on Main Street and ended up at this little ice cream shop. We stopped for some desert and some light conversation which kept up all the way to my front door. My Cookies N Creme was melting in the cup I had ordered and turned into ice cream soup. With one hand I held my ice cream, in the other I fumbled for my house key.

I finally got the right key in my hand and looked up to say goodnight when I felt hands on my face. His hands. His soft eyes looked deep into mine and then it happened. Our first kiss. It was gentle yet passionate. It was the lusting of something more than questionable for a first date. It was the confirmation that this night was a success and that, hopefully, there would be another. My foot started to lift up and I felt like I was in one of those romantic comedies where the girl’s foot pops when she kisses her crush. I felt like a teenager again.

He moved away, keeping my face in his hands and said his goodnight.

“Get some sleep, I will talk to you tomorrow love.” Then he walked down the front steps.

My hand to my lips reliving the kiss that just happened. I put my key in the lock, turned it and walked into my house.

What a night.