The Deep South, and Everybody Else!

I am 52 years old and married to a wonderful Texas girl named Misty. We have 3 kids, and at the time of this article, 2 grandkids. We also have 3 rotten dogs. I have had the privilege of traveling the world as a professional musician for 30+ years. I was involved in a serious accident in 2009, I weigh about 430 pounds, and am now confined to a wheelchair and on oxygen full time.

I am also a redneck hillbilly, who has been cursed with a terminal disease called common sense, and I have found out that there is no vaccine for stupid. I do not argue, nor do I discuss politics, but more about trying to understand the underlying issued due to the lack of common sense, and the abundance of pure stupidity.

Nothing in this article will be politically correct, and if you are easily offended, you probably want to stop here and go to your safe space. Cuddle your teddy bear, order a cauliflower pizza and cry about the mean old fat cripple guy that hurt your feelings.

Article 1: LATHER, RINSE, REPEAT

The shampoo bottle says to lather, rinse, repeat. How many times do we have to repeat?

I saw a law firm commercial once that said “if you or a loved one used this product and died, call us.”

Then there are the medication commercials that say “if you are allergic to this drug don’t take it.”

Saw a breakfast pastry that had microwave instructions to heat for 3 seconds and let set for 1 minute to cool.

Again, what kind of idiot caused these companies to have to place these types of directions on these products? As a kid growing up in the Deep South, we did some pretty stupid stuff as little redneck heathens. If you were outside playing, (I will explain what that means later), and you were thirsty, you did not go buy a $2.oo bottle of water. You went over to the outside water faucet and drank straight out of the garden hose. Funny thing Is in my day, no-one was ever thirsty for a tide pod or a spoon full of cinnamon, and we didn’t have to be told that the coffee we got from McDonalds was hot.

We DID NOT know what a time out was, we were not grounded, we didn’t have that little “I’m disappointed in your choices” talk. We got our butt whipped. (I will go more into detail on this later). Our parents and grandparents never allowed us the opportunity to be disrespectful or mouthy, and we knew how we were supposed to act in public or around company, or we knew what would happen when we got home. If we made it that far.

Outside playing explained:

We did not have the option of sitting in our room near a tv all day, playing with video games, computers, or the internet. We were told to go outside and play. We chased each other with sticks, jumped our bikes that we had to pedal over things that sometimes sent us to the hospital, shot each other with BB guns, pushed each other off of the roof of the barn because it was funny, and were then carried to the couch with an ice pack on the head. No ambulance or doctors. The old question of were you dropped on your head as a child? The answer is YES, multiple times! My younger brother and Myself survived. In fact we both have families, He is a pastor, and as I said before, I had a very successful career in the music industry before the accident caused me to retire.

Butt whipping explained:

There were things in my day that parents kept in their secret arsenal. Belts, switches,(small branches or limbs used for persuasion), wooden spoons, flip flops, boards, sometimes called paddles,( ball and paddle toys, cutting boards, 1x2, etc), barber straps, hairbrushes, plus many others, and they knew how to use them. Were we abused, no! Were we taught how to act in public and be respectful...ABSOLUTELY! We never thought about disrespecting adults, teachers, elders, law enforcement, or anyone else. We used yes mam, no mam, yes sir, no sir, thank you and please. We opened doors and offered our seats to females and elders, and usually anyone else just to be nice, or we got “wait till I get you home”, or “wait till I tell your dad”, or “what have I taught you?”

We also had friends. We never asked them how much money their parents had, or if they had a pool. We never worried about if they were ugly, short, tall, fat, skinny, gay, lesbian, nerd, geek, athlete, heck, we even hung out with high school band members. As a matter of fact, my wife is a big girl that wears glasses and was a mathlete! Queen of the nerds!

We worked for everything we got. We were not, and did not expect to be handed everything for nothing. We had to pay for our schooling, we actually had to do the work. If you got your feelings hurt, you got over it. If you cried, you got made fun of or beat up, so you learned to be tough. No safe spaces, or snowflake protection groups.

So that was life in the Deep South, and now you know what is wrong with Most of the younger generations of today!