The Breakup

So, I dated this girl for almost four months, and it was a relationship that happened because we were already good friends from high school and the connection was already established.

We both went to different colleges and I think that made it even harder. But towards the end of the relationship, I started to feel suffocated in the relationship and I started seeing a side of her that I had never seen when we were just friends... and I didn't like it.

She was too insecure, jealous, and tried starting fights for no reason. Like, if I hung out with my friends who happen to be girls, she was way too jealous about it, and it made me feel untrusted. It was frustrating because she had guy friends and I have NEVER told her NOT to hang out with them because I trusted her 100 percent. Clearly she didn't though, and it was the beginning of the end. It was frustrating that we didn't have the same level of trust for each other.

Like, there was this one time when she was hanging out with my best friend at her college campus and she asked him if I was cheating on her with a redhead girl from my college. Like, REALLY? A relationship can only work when there is communication between the two people in the relationship. BUT NOOO... Instead of talking to me and asking me what's up, she went to him.

Obviously, he is MY BEST FRIEND so he told me. So the next time I saw her I was expecting a confrontation or a conversation so we can work it out. But nope. She didn't mention a single thing—which I thought was weird, and was a bit confusing.

Another thing wrong with the relationship was that she didn't want to take responsibility, and when things go wrong in the relationship or in her life, it was automatically my fault.

For example, her college residence was an hour-and-a-half public transit ride from me and there is always some kind of delay or problem. So sometimes it takes me even longer to get there. I tried to see her at least once-a-week. The thing was, I was the one doing the heavy traveling and she usually doesn't come to the city—which was fine, until she started to think I wasn't putting enough effort in the relationship and that she felt neglected and it was always my fault. EXCUSE ME!!!!

But when we go on dates, which one of us pays all the time? I DID.

Which one of us does the traveling to see each other? I DID.

So don't tell me that I wasn't committed to the relationship when I'm the one who always makes the effort to see you. Whether it snowed like the north pole, rained like Vancouver, or anything, I was the one reaching, not you. This brings me back to another incident when I already made plans to see my camp friends. Mind you guys, I haven't seen my camp friends since August, and at this point, it was sometime in December or January.

So I made my plans ahead of time for the weekend. So my then-girlfriend texted me asking if I can come to her residence and hang out and I politely told her I already made plans to see my camp friends for that weekend. She replied with "ok" and I thought that was it. But later on, I get a text from her asking to call her at 6 PM. I wasn't thinking much of it. She probably just wanted to talk right? OH NO.

So we were on the phone for like 30 minutes (but it felt like 30 years) and the whole time it was her telling me what I was doing wrong in the relationship and how I neglected her. But I took it like a champ, 'cause I didn't want to start a fight with her. Like Khalid said, "I'd rather be a lover than a fighter." I let her bombard me and just get over it. I could've stood up for myself but I felt like it would be creating unnecessary drama which I didn't need in my life.

That was when I started questioning whether it is best to stay in this relationship or not. I thought about it long and hard. And finally, I came to a decision—I decided to end it. So, I went to her campus with my best friend. I broke up with her face-to-face, which I thought was appropriate given that we were in a relationship for almost four months. When we broke up, I gave her the simplified version of reason—which was, I had lost interest in the relationship. That's all I felt like she needed to know.

Now, I'm not saying I was perfect in the relationship but I always put in 100 percent and it was sad to see that it wasn't good enough to satisfy some people. Could I have done things a little differently? Yes. There is always something to fix within yourself and I knew that.

You guys are the judge for this...

Find out what happens after the breakup in the next article. Can the good friendship we once had survived or is the drama too much to handle?