Stop Dissing Open Relationships

by Ellowen Ophelia 10 days ago in dating

While this doesn’t have to be sexual in nature sometimes it truly is. Why on Earth would you not want to explore your sexual boundaries? What if there are no boundaries? Yeah, I’m talking a big old, hot, sweaty free for all. Today kids, we are going to be talking about the opinion that sits at the bottom of the barrel along with my hate for Rootbeer, open relationships.

Stop Dissing Open Relationships

In my personal opinion at one point or another we have all had that subtle (or severe) need to have our cake and eat it too. Sometimes we look at human beings and get that certain itch that only they can scratch with their nails of unbridled passion. Sometimes these humans aren’t your boyfriend or your girlfriend but mere strangers you’d like to sleep with. Maybe you even just love their personality and want nothing more than to kiss them. Maybe they are just the dopest person to shuck and jive through your hometown with.

While this doesn’t have to be sexual in nature sometimes it truly is. Why on Earth would you not want to explore your sexual boundaries? What if there are no boundaries? Yeah, I’m talking a big old, hot, sweaty free for all. Today kids, we are going to be talking about the opinion that sits at the bottom of the barrel along with my hate for Rootbeer, open relationships.

What Is An Open Relationship

For those who don’t know it’s basically when you have a primary partner but continue to seek other sexual experiences or romantic companionship. Now, you might be thinking to yourself this his outright hoeism. Here’s why it’s not.

When in an open relationship you are just that, open. Your communication and boundaries are set in place between you and your partner. It could be a “don’t ask don’t tell” situation. You two could be completely free and open with who you are sleeping with or seeing. Hell, y’all could even tag-team a stranger or two. The possibilities are honestly endless.

People in open relationships have been viewed on a very taboo scale when in reality they are doing the safest things they can. Communication is super crucial on both ends throughout. I think you can pretty much talk about anything as a couple after you bust someone open together.

Meeting New People

Now, let’s go back in time for a second. Do you remember when you first met your significant other? Like the insane amount of butterflies that just kicked you in the stomach and then flew out your butthole? Do you remember how literally beautiful that was? Do you remember the thrill of meeting your partner?

You could literally have that same thrill with different people and still come home to the one person you truly love. It’s always great making new friends, expressing common interests, or even just going on adventures with someone. Just in this case you get to bang them at the end of it all. How cool is that?

Sex And Bodies Aren't Celebrated Enough

At the end of the day we were born into a society that decided for us that relationships should only consist of one man and one woman. Bodies and sex regardless of gender or lack thereof are beautiful. We as people made our bodies this secret to others. We decided what was and wasn’t okay based solely upon the way of others. I don’t know how you feel about that but I’m thinking that’s some dumb-dumb stuff. I love my body, flaws and all. If I feel like posting a picture in my bra why should anyone be allowed to stop me? If I’m feeling confident about my body who’s right is it to strip that away.

Sex is an even deeper level of connection with a person. Sure, some people don’t jump into the sheets thinking about connections and flower picking but a lot of people actually put time and effort into building that bond that will make the sex as heightened as it possibly can be. Sex is viewed as this thing we should keep to ourselves and our partner. However, there is a whole other horizon out there. Open relationships open you up to so much more than you’d imagine.

Open Relationships Are Not Exclusive to Sex

While many people view open relationships as basically this big cluster of sluts; there is one thing they fail to realize. Being in an open relationship can mean that you have sex with your primary partner and only have intimate connections with other people that don’t involve sex. Open relationships and sex don’t always go to together. Having a heart big enough to love more than one person is a reward in itself in this cold world. It’s almost like society just doesn’t want to have fun.

My Perspective Being On The Outskirts of An Open Relationship

For a really long time I lived my life believing that I could only be with one man. I still in fact do believe that but I also believe that things happen to change certain factors of our lives as we grow and develop as people. There was a friend of mine that I had flirted with for literal years. We were super close. He lives on the complete opposite end of the Earth (minor exaggeration he lives on the other side of the state) so we had more of a long-distance friendship for many years. His grandmother lives in my town so one year he came home for the holidays and we hooked up. It changed everything.

We didn’t really talk about the hook up or anything for awhile, we just kept being each other's support in the friendship department. He had like three girlfriends over the period of time that I had known him and he was unfaithful to at least two of them with me. For a really long time I couldn’t read him. I couldn’t really figure out what it was he wanted from the world. It became honestly kind of frustrating. We stopped talking.

It was a sad time but I honestly felt like we weren’t in the same headspace anymore. It kind of felt like a break up but then again he wasn’t even mine. It’s complicated. Anyways, years go by of us just doing our own thing and somehow, we ended up reconnecting. I knew him and his ex from our previous speaking were done so I assumed he was single. He looked good. We hooked up.

Come to find out he’s engaged. So, I’m like fuming. Like honestly melting with rage at the fact that he kept such a thing from her and I. Only he hadn’t kept it from her. I was honestly kind of baffled when he told me she knew and I honestly thought he was lying for fear of me telling her. The two of them are in the beautiful open relationship. They are getting married and it’s just so great because I still get to keep my best friend. The maturity you build in relationships like these is wild.

Her and I don’t deal with each other really but it’s so amazing that she knows she’s solid enough in her position to let him do what he wants. I never realized the beauty of it till then.

At the end of the day we are humans who have desires and feelings and emotions. It’s just kind of impossible to think sexually of or be attracted to one person. Look at Liam Hemsworth. Wooo child.

dating
Ellowen Ophelia
Ellowen Ophelia
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Ellowen Ophelia

I believe that to write there mustn't be a cap on the subjects in which you speak. There shouldn't be a limit to your knowledge no matter the content. Welcome to my page and the twisty road it will take you down. -Ellowen <3

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