So What's It Like To Be In A Mixed Race Marriage?

I personally don't have a problem with being married to somebody who happens to be Japanese, though I do think other people do. As far as I am concerned love is love, period.

Over the years I have had my share of racial slurs to deal with. The first time I got to experience this was way back when I was married to a Spanish woman. I got constant ribbing from my work colleagues who reacted as if I was married to some sort of alien from another planet.

In the end that marriage didn't work out and, after ten years of living alone, I got wed to my present wife. At the time we were living in the south of Spain and oh boy did we get an education in stupidity and racism. Just to make a point, there isn't any racist gene, racism is born of crass ignorance which itself comes from a poor education and nothing more.

Some people are so badly educated, one Spanish guy asked me what sex was like Oriental style. I just ignored him and walked away. I would never ever answer that question about anybody I was intimate with, it is just so icky, if you know what I mean.

Another, older, Spanish guy seemed to think my wife was some sort of Asian whore who I would be happy to pass on to him when I was finished with her. Quite disgusting really.

And a South American guy who I knew, upon seeing me with my wife for the first time, made squinty eye gestures in my direction. I ignored it at the time. However when I next saw him and challenged him about it he denied it. I told him if he ever did that to me again there would be a problem. That was the end of that contact.

The other problem for other people is that my Asian wife is some twenty years younger than me, but she looks easily thirty years younger. I had one Australian guy try to hit on my wife right in front of me, believing that she was just a young Asian whore loose with her favours for older men.

He invited himself to sit at our table and completely ignoring me said…..

"Hello Cutie, and what's your name?"

"Well it's certainly not Cutie, Blue."I said.

"In fact she's called my wife, if you don't mind. It's really not cool to hit on another man's wife right in front of him.So if it's all the same to you, you can move on."

He looked at me in disbelief then got up and went and sat at the bar. Minutes later his girlfriend arrived. I was sorely tempted to return him the favour, but I'm too much of a gentleman to be bothered with rude people like him.

Of course we get curious stares when we are out and about. But we just ignore it, it's all you can do really.

I think maybe some folk stare not just because of the age or colour difference, but I am also almost twice her size. Again, not a problem for us.

Mostly we are treated as normal by the majority of people. And I certainly don't think of her as Japanese. To me she's just my lovely wife. And I think she feels the same to be honest. We are just a normal couple enjoying our lives together and that is all there is to it.

Do we live any differently to same race couples? Apart from having a mixed diet of east and west cuisine, we're just like any other couple who have a normal life. She has her work and I have mine, and we share all domestic duties.

So for anyone who expects some sort of scandalous revelation they can gossip about, there isn't any. Sorry to disappoint you, we're just normal folk trying to get along with the world and enjoy our lives together.