Showing Up At Your Ex's House (Should I Show Up At My Ex's House)

There are a lot of things that can go wrong when you are fresh out of a breakup and desperate to get your life back on track. Most of these harmful behaviors can be fixed or balanced out if you can just identify them and stop them immediately. Once you get out of your own way, the path to recovery can be very simple. Here are a few of the mistakes you could be making right now.

1) Acting needy and desperate - That mistake actually lies at the core of most other possible mistakes you can make. If you manage to get this your needy emotions under control, you will be way-way ahead in the process of getting your ex back.

See, people are programmed to reject neediness. It's the same not only in love but in almost any situation in life... Think for a moment... For example, would you hire someone for a job, because they were pleading, nagging or begging you? I suspect, you wouldn't... You would rather hire the person that you like most and that is best suitable to work with you.

This principle applies to so many areas of life folks, ESPECIALLY in relationships and love. Keep that in mind.

2) Reasoning and nagging - Many people confuse a break up with a debate to be won. You cannot persuade or convince your ex to call off the break up. You shouldn't try to list reasons why you two are perfect for each other. That's not how love works. They have already evaluated those elements and made their decision. You have to make them aware that they are missing something and increase their desire for you...

You can get back your loved one, only if they WANT to come back to you because they respect you and feel attracted.

Although this is counterintuitive, letting your ex some time to "breathe" right now is one of the best things you can do to save your relationship. This will build attraction much more, than if you bombard them with attention or nag them constantly.

3) Drunken Dialing - Alcohol is never a solution to your problems, but it can help to dull the pain so its not surprising that a lot of people drink during a heavy breakup. Unfortunately, this can lead to Drunk Dialing, when you are so depressed and had so much to drink that a late-night phone call to the ex actually starts to sound like a good idea.

Unfortunately, this is a common situation that more and more brokenhearted people are finding themselves in, and it does a lot of damage to any attempts to get your ex back. If your ex even picks up, you are just going to end up embarrassing yourself. Even if you get the voicemail, you're still going to seriously regret it...the hangover wont be the only thing you have to deal with in the morning.

4) Text-Message Terrorism - Nobody likes having wave after wave of phone calls, emails, or text messages from people they don't really want to talk to. Sadly, that's exactly what text message terrorism is. Even if the intentions are good, all you are going to accomplish is driving your ex crazy!

It is really easy to fall into this. Even if it doesn't seem like something you would do, being in such a turmoil can make you very desperate...desperate enough to practically harass your ex with constant calls. This will only alienate you and your ex, and drive him to be so tired of you that he avoids you entirely...which makes getting him back significantly harder.

5) Deciding to drink and neglecting your appearance - This one seems obvious, but many of us seem unable to follow that advice. I know, I have been guilty of making this mistake before too... But... Why is this such a big mistake?

The only chance you have with your ex is if they like you and WANT to come back to you. Do you think they will get attracted to you, because you can drink a whole bottle of wine before going to bed? Do you think they will get attracted to you, because you sit around the house all day, watching endless hours of TV and looking like a zombie...?

On the other hand, if you try and make the best out of the situation, don't let yourself dow, get together with some friends and actually start exercising and looking after yourself, you WILL become more attractive and desirable to your ex!

6) The Endless Slump - This is an incredibly rough time in your life, and many find themselves so depressed that they just stop living their lives. Time and the world around them just passes them by as they fight just to get up in the mornings...losing as much as they win. For a lot of people, the world outside their house doesn't even exist.

This is a very damaging problem that can do more than keep you from getting your ex back, it can keep you from ever getting anything. After a few missed days at class or work, you start to fall behind and you can even end up flunking or getting fired. Your friends will start to avoid talking to you because all you have to talk about is your pain, because there isn't anything else in your life at all. Until you realize that this just cannot be the way you live your life, this behavior will continue to plague you until it drains you out and dries you up.

These are only some of the issues you may face, but it is very important that you try to avoid them at all costs. It is okay if you have already fell to one or all of them, but the time is now to stop letting these behaviors harm you. If you can rid yourself of these problems and develop a complete and well thought-out plan, you will soon discover just how easy it can be to get your ex back and get your life back on track.

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