Shaken Not Stirred

I went to the bar for a single glass of Merlot, and the next morning I woke up beside a stranger for the first time in my life. Shockingly, I didn't panic. I took a moment to just to breathe and stare at the ceiling. Uncertain of the events that lead me here, all I could do was lay there in disbelief. I gazed at this unfamiliar but extremely handsome man thinking to myself, I don't even know his name. Wait. What is his name? As if my head wasn't hurting enough, It began throbbing harder as I realized that I was in bed with a man who's name I couldn't even remember.

"Excuse me," I whispered very softly and politely as I tapped him on the shoulder with the tip of my index finger. I barely wanted to touch him. He didn't wake immediately so I cleared my throat and repeated myself. "Umm... excuse me." He awoke with a grin and hot breath. "Goodmorning beautiful," he said while looking into my eyes with an excitement that wasn't mutual. I was almost too ashamed to ask but it had to be done. "What's your name again?," I flashed him a fake smile. "Kevin" he giggled, but I didn't see anything funny. How did I, of all people, end up on the wrong side of a hangover? How many glasses of wine did I have and at what number did I lose all my moral reasoning?

"Kevin, yeah that's right!" I said as I eased off the bed with the covers clenched tight to my chest, "It's been really fun but I'm gonna get dressed and head out." I reached down really quickly to grab my dress while keeping direct eye contact with this oddly happy, yet still extremely handsome stranger. I was trying really hard not to let him see my naked body, so I held the covers across the front of my body with one arm, stepped into my dress, and then pulled it up with the other.

He watched me silently until I finally dropped the covers. The longer I looked at him the more I experienced flashbacks of the night we shared. "It's funny, you weren't this shy last night," he said as he stepped off the bed, and begin walking towards me. I'm really terrible in awkward situations so every time he took a step forward, I took a step back until I was pressed firm against the dresser. "Speaking of last night, could you refresh my memory? I think I had a few too many glasses of wine." "I don't think it was the wine," Kevin responded, "It was probably all the martinis you had."

I was more confused now than I was initially because I absolute never drink martinis. I like to stick to what I know and that's 2 glasses of Merlot, 3 if i'm feeling really good. Kevin, noticing the confusion on my face began trying to help jog my memory. "Look," he said, putting both his hands on his hips and shaking side to side really femininely, "Shaken not stirred, remember?" Suddenly, I was mortified. I remembered everything.

The bartender claimed to know my life was 'boring' simply by seeing me only drink red wine and then go home for a year straight. How does drinking what I like make me boring? I don't know why but I guess I really felt the need to prove her wrong. I know how to have fun and I wanted her to know that.

"Oh my gawd!" I cried out in embarrassment, "I remember, I was in the middle of the bar shaking my hips and sipping on countless martinis like a rhythmless stripper." Kevin began laughing as if he was replaying the actual footage in his head. "It was cute. You go into that bar just as often as I do, and I've never seen you that relaxed or happy." I tried to overlook the way he let me know that I've caught his attention before, but I couldn't. "You've seen me before lastnight?" I asked with a little more enthusiasm than I had hopped to. "Of course" he replied, "I've been smiling at you for months, you've just never noticed me."

I slipped off into a daydream because as single as I am, I couldn't believe I had overlooked such a handsome man for so many months. Had my life really gotten that dull and repetitive that I only saw what I wanted? Damn. "Soooo am I going to see you again or are you going back to Merlot?" Kevin asked, interrupting my epiphany. Without hesitation, I told him "I'm definitely going back to Merlot, but you will see me again."

I had proved my point but there's no need to get crazy. I had experienced enough shaking and stirring in one night than I was prepared for.