Please don't be a premonition of 2021...

This year began with an anti- climax as I spent the evening in bed with the Flu , browsing my bank accounts in search of some way to feed myself. I realized with a heavy weakness that I would not be getting a proper meal on my own and began to ask friends for money for delivery as I couldn't leave the house till it was confirmed I did not have Covid-19. A friend helped graciously and I was able to fill my stomach while writhing in pain, watching Star Trek, and hoping I'd be well in time to start my new job.

2021 slid into my life like that creepy guy from high school that slides into your DM's. Boring, and leaving you with a sinking guttural feeling. I rang in the New Year poor and sickly which sounds about like what I'd expected, now that I'm looking back, but it was unpleasant none the less.

Yesterday though seemed to be the most fitting audio representation of what I've come to prepare myself for each year. As I emerged from my apartment to smoke, I heard not one, nor two, but four distinctly different alarms going all at once. Two alarms came wafting through the air in volatile waves, from the apartment building right next door, seemingly with every apartment in the building going off simultaneously. Amidst the alarms, there was my favorite family I have never met, in a panic yelling about gathering their children, before it seemed they decided to stay put.

Down the street I could hear the other two alarms, sounding from cars that seemed to be about two blocks from one another, adding their chorus between the beets of the building next door as if this was the natural approach to take. I sat on my deck, deciding it would be a good idea to record this odd occurrence while smoking a CBD joint and drinking coffee. At about the four minute mark of the recording you can hear our favorite family start to wonder where the Fire Department is, seeing as the Department was only three and a half blocks away. Almost as if to respond, you could hear a fire truck about four blocks off turn on their alarm for just about ten seconds, as if to say "yeah, we aren't coming".

I sat on my deck for at least 10 minutes with the alarm sounding all the while, having realized I had finished my joint, and it being cold, I decided to head back in. Upon re-entering my apartment I could see the red and blue lights of a police car dancing across my bedroom ceiling. Peaking out provided no extra information as the Police car was tucked securely behind a bush in the parking lot next door. Having realized how bizarre this situation felt, I resolved to stay indoors for as long as I could.

With 2020 having been such a surrealist experience for the whole world it almost feels as though none of us are as hopeful as we usually are this time of the year as we sit in our homes, holing a stale breathe we have been retaining for almost a solid year now. Holding that last glimmer of hope that we can return to a life that allows room for smiles, handshakes, and hugs again. Perhaps we will all come out of this with a better understanding of ourselves, but I have a feeling we are just getting started, and that is what scares my little extroverted heart the most.

Last night also ended anti-climactically after this, with a simple set of chores and a weird feeling when I turned out the lights.

while everything stated here happened, it may be painted through a dismal lens as I usually write horror... Thank - You for reading and be safe out there