Pear Shaped Body

Running around on the seawall, dodging inconsiderate cyclists rushing past her and overly relaxed families strolling along the path, Evelyn pushed her body to the absolute limit, until finally taking a break by a large arbutus tree offering her a bit of shade. Gulping down huge mouthfuls of air, she checked her phone that was strapped to her arm and surveyed the statistics the device cleverly figured out for her.

14000 steps in total. 700 calories burned. Workout time: 1 hour

Feeling the sweat rolling down her back, she went right back to running, motivated by the promise of a hot meal and cool shower when she got back to her home in downtown Vancouver. As she turned the corner, a behemoth of a horse was pulling a wagon full of laughing tourists, so she gave a wide berth to the animal and ran past it while trying to ignore the stench of simmering dog feces in the garbage bins.

Having been on city council before, she knew it was against the rules to throw feces into the garbage and that the bylaw requires people to rather flush them down the toilet. Nevertheless, the act of throwing poop into the garbage is one of widespread practice, and of little enforcement by the city on its part.

Going back home to quickly shower and down a quick breakfast before heading to work, she examined herself in the mirror and let out a small sigh of disappointment. She had been working on high intensity exercise for nearly two weeks now and was still plagued with excess body fat around and below her waist, giving her the bottom-heavy shape of a pear.

After her shower and breakfast, she donned a formal shirt and pants, and drove her red sedan to a large, monstrous skyscraper, parking in the underground lot. She took the elevators to the thirtieth floor and was immediately confronted with the hustle and bustle of the office environment.

“Hello Evey! Top of the morning to you!”

Mike greeted her just as always and with a wink from his eyes.

Rolling her own eyes, Evelyn tried her best to not show her irritation at being called Evey, and replied back to the overly-friendly male coworker.

“Hi Mike, err…nice…to see you too.”

Sitting down in her cubicle, she couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable as her lower half was too large in the medium sized chair.

Opening up her email, she read her work instructions for the day from her manager Charles, who had come up behind her to check on her.

“Hi there Evelyn!”

Nearly jumping out of her skin, Evelyn was surprised by Charles’ sudden approach and was nervously smiling, trying not to reveal that she had a secret crush on him.

“Oh, hey Charles, sorry you caught me by surprise there!”

“I’m sorry, ha ha. I tend to sneak up on people unintentionally. So did you have a chance to look over the assignments today?”

“Yes sir, they seem not too difficult and I’ll try my darnedest to finish them by the end of my shift.”

Putting on a smile that would have made any single woman swoon, Charles patted Evelyn on the shoulder and walked back to his office with his regular mug of decaffeinated coffee.

Finding herself staring at her charming manager, whose arms resembled a large limb on a tree, stout and thick as a bough, she could feel her ears turning slightly pinkish, admiring him from a distance.

“Watcha looking at Evey? You look like you were day dreaming there.”

Nervously shaking her head and trying to preoccupy herself with the papers in her hand, Evelyn shooed off Mike from her space and took one last glance at Charles before starting her assignment.

Wearing a pink finger protector, she double checked the hundreds of papers she already printed over her short time in the office. Looking over at the ginormous clock hanging over the receptionist, she realized it was lunchtime. Saving all her work on the company laptop, she shut the lid eagerly to pause her work and delight in a scrumptious and satisfying lunch.

Walking briskly into one of the three elevators giving access to and exit from the office, the doors was about to close when a hand intercepted them and Mike walked in beside her.

“Hey Evey! Are you going to have lunch? Do you mind if I buy you lunch? Oh and I’ve got a flower for you. I saw this rose on sale so I thought I’d buy it for you…err…not just because it was on sale. So…we up for lunch?”

The hopeful look on Mike’s face made it extremely difficult for Evelyn to reject him, but his advances towards her only made him seem desperate—something she did not appreciate. Also, she was focused on getting the attention of her secret crush, Charles, while not having much interest in Mike. Charles was the whole reason why she tried so hard and pushed so hard to get into shape, that perhaps there would be a sliver of hope in catching her prized man.

“Sorry Mike, I’d prefer to eat alone today. But thank you for the offer.”

But the jovial man was not easily deterred, and Evelyn’s declination made him all the more determined to marry her.

Getting off at the restaurant floor of the building, Mike offered one last time,

“Last chance for a free lunch Evey, you coming?”

Shaking her head, she pressed the close door button over and over, hoping it would close faster so she could stop making the fake polite smile to her persistent coworker. Arriving at the cafeteria, Evelyn waited with dozens of other hungry office workers, navigating the zig zag lines leading up to the serving areas. Getting hold of a clean, freshly rinsed tray still hot from the dishwasher, she then picked up a glass for her favourite sparkling flavoured water.

Hearing a glass shattering behind her, she felt sorry for the girl who was trying her best to clean up the shards of glass and so she bent over to try and help the girl who was clearly embarrassed. Behind them, there was some quiet snickering from a few men in the lineup, clearly amused at the unfit bottom portion of Evelyn’s body.

Glaring at the men, they quieted down and Evelyn continued moving on towards the serving area. Desperately hungry for pasta or fries, Evelyn opted for a relatively healthy salmon dish with spinach salad on the side, all for the sake of losing weight. Bringing her meal to the checkout, a single lone teardrop threatened to fall but was quickly brushed aside in the hopes it was unseen by the cashier.

“Are you okay miss?”

Putting on a fake smile and nodding her head, Evelyn dismissed her insecurity and pretended that nothing had happened, although inwardly she could still hear the snickering behind her and it felt like a part of her died inside, that she had no more reason to even try to fit society’s norm.”

Paying for her food and setting her lunch on a table by the window, she called the one person who she knew she could count on to listen to her overbearing troubles.

“Hey Sandy, I really need to talk. Something came up at work. You have a moment?”

“Yeah Evelyn, for sure, what’s going on? It’s not like you to call during work hours.”

“I’m sick and tired of looking like a pear. I’m sick and tired of this body. I feel everyone just laughs at me and Charles doesn’t even know I have feelings for him. I’ve always thought that if I could, you know, look normal, he would notice me.”

“Dear, you have to be content with what you do have, and not what you don’t have yet. Alright, I gotta get back to work, call me later today and we’ll meet up and talk later.”

Riding the elevator up to her apartment, Evelyn exhaustedly changed and slowly laid down on her memory foam bed. She was unable to think of anything besides sleeping, in the hopes she would wake up from the nightmare she was in. Her pillow muffled her sobs, and absorbed all her tears, just as it had for the last five years since she moved into Vancouver’s most elite neighbourhood. Recalling her long conversation with Sandy at her favourite coffee shop, the two of them talked about goals, contentment and satisfaction with life, and the importance of having a reason to live for, that can sustain you in the hardest of times.

Tossing around in her bed and entangling herself with her covers, Evelyn suddenly felt motivated more than ever to get her body into shape, if not to win the affection of Charles, to win the respect of people instead of their criticisms. Still dressed in her pajamas, she got on her treadmill and began jogging in the middle of the night, with the flickering hope of achieving physical beauty, which she would need to protect and coax into flame.

Drops of determination dribbled down before splatting onto the tiled floor. Wiping down with a freshly washed towel that smelled like mangos, she breathed a sigh of satisfaction at having completed her midnight workout. Tired both physically and emotionally, Evelyn crashed onto her bed and within minutes was sound asleep; her conscience drifting off to a happier world where everyone she met was her friend and not a critic of her body shape.

Dodging yet another group of cyclists hogging the seawall like they owned the place, Evelyn kept up her fast tempo, not quite a sprint yet not a walk either, but somewhere in between. Over two months had passed since her pep talk with Sandy and Evelyn’s hard work and sheer ambition were starting to pay off. In fact, she had lost so much weight that new clothes were needed, as most of her old ones were much too large.

Entering the office confident that Charles would finally notice her, she saw that there was a celebrating group around the manager’s office. Walking towards the crowd, she was in disbelief as they were celebrating Charles’ engagement to Lucy. Charles’ fiancé was a jolly, round lady, who was clearly not in the best of shape. The pair were beaming at the praise and support from the entire office, and Evelyn put on yet another fake smile, clapping her hands awkwardly while hiding her devastation and confusion over what a man finds attractive in a woman.

Back in her apartment, Evelyn rinsed some pre-mixed salad greens and poured a generous amount of sundried tomato dressing. Putting her bowl onto the table, she looked across at the empty chair and imagined Charles sitting with her, smiling and joking with his masculine charm.

Eating her salad, Evelyn started talking to her imaginary crush, her words dissipating into the empty chair.

“Charles, you’ll never believe what I saw today at the sea wall. There was a coyote chasing dogs and their walkers. Would you believe that? Oh, and we’re low on milk and bread, would you mind dropping off to the grocery store to pick some up? Also, that fellow Mike keeps hitting on me. The nerve of him, eh? But don’t worry, I have no intention of giving him any of my affection.”

As she continued her one-way conversation, she figured that if she could not have Charles in reality, she would have him in her imagination. In her obsession with her manager, her mind started to lose its grip on reality, and her pride would not concede defeat, even if it meant only imagining her desires. Slowly and surely, she began slipping into the psychological pit of psychosis, the consequence of neglecting her mental health in her drive to be physical fit.