Painkillers

Painkillers

From compared to all us, Khadijah is the least bothered. One could say indifferent, and from the looks of it..joyous. She drives in cruise mode, one hand stirring the direction of the car and the other holding yet another cigarette (she lit awhile making a left turn.) Tanya (sits uptop Sky's lap) as Niecey and I sit smushed alongside each door. Lala is unusually mute as she changes stations from off the radio. Finally she stops on a station playing "Massive Attack" by Nicki Minaj. I hear Khadijah rap, "Pop a bottle just to get my head right, tell a doctor go and get my meds right, Monster, you know it wouldn't be proper, If we didn't return with a big rocket launcher, Massive Attack, mmn massive attack."

Niecey, "Take me at the CVS down the street, I need painkillers."

Lala, "You want me to go in?"

Niecey, "No."

Lala, "You sure?"

(A very prominent bruise has begun to form around Nieceys' eye. I sense Lala is being polite, yet, the rest of us (excluding Khadijah) are pretending all is normal. Her lump is sizable and pulsating. I wonder if she will ever seek medical help. We pull up infront of a CVS nearby Brooklyn Station, (which is readily close to campus. I cannot wait to return to my bed.) Niecey slams the door on her way out.

Lala, "Is anyone goin' say anything?"

Tanya, "No, least not now."

Sky, "It looks a like donut around her eye. Oh my gosh."

Khadijah, "You bitches are fuunny."

Lala, " Uh, guurrll.. If you saw what I saw, and if you seein' what im seein' I want no parts. She a ticking time bomb."

Khadijah, "Told you.. You bitches don't wanna' listen."

Lala, "Aiight, we get back to campus and then what?"

Khadijah, "We go our seperate ways."

Lala, "I can't jus' do that."

Khadijah, "You deal wit' Blue, you don't deal wit' Niecey."

Lala, "Uhh, I wish I had no-gives-a-fuck but after today..I can't afford pissin' her off."

Khadijah, "And jus' how would you do that La?"

Lala, "I don't know..anything can set her off at this point."

Tanya, "I say we get back to campus, unpack her stuff and let her bring the car back. I think she needs to go to the emergency room."(my eyes widen as finally someone speaks the truth.)

Khadijah, "This ain't her first go round. You all act as if we should have compassion for someone like her. Let it go."

Lala, "Damn, bitch do you ever care about other's feelins'?"

Khadijah, "Do you?"

Lala, "This is different."

Khadijah, "Exactly. Only thing is I don't have to pretend I give a fuck."

Lala, "Wait a minute..why'd you come?"

Khadijah, "I requested a dub if I had to come along."

Lala, "Damn..you really don't give a fuck?"

(As Niecey returns, the conversation dies down. We all become as silent as church mice while she chases a handful of painkillers down with an Arizona tea.)

Niecey, "None ah' you ain't shit foreal, I have a big ass lump on my face an' not one of you bitches told me."

Khadijah, "How you figure?" (Scoffs aloud, cigarette in hand.)

Niecey, "Lala look in the glovebox and gimme' Blues' shades."

Tanya, "I don't mean to be all up in your business..but don't you want to go an emergency room?"

Niecey, "Bitch, what you think I bought Tylenol for? All I need is time. Time is all I need. None ah' you know shit about love or relationships. This will pass."

Tanya, "Scuse me, I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for nearly four years. And love, real love doesn't include abuse. I don't know about you..but ive been really nice to you. And all you give is this stank attitude."

Khadijah says under her breath, "All the time."

Niecey, "Bitch you have any idea who you talkin' to?"

Tanya, "Yea I do. I've been real nice to you, and all you give is this superior act like you better an' shit."

Khadijah, "Tell it."

Niecey, "You bitches in my car..takin' a seat in my shit..guurlah! You all got nerve."

Khadijah, "Can you drive good wit' that black eye? I'll get out now. No problem wit' me."

Niecey pauses to think before answering. She suddenly bursts into tears. Her cry echoes throughout the entire car. However, her vulnerability is short lived once she says, "Khadijah take me to Dre spot. La, give Dre a call I'm on my way wit' the reup."

Lala, "Uhh, um, uhh.. We gotta give this car back once we get back to campus."

Niecey, "Bitch this my damn car, I've made payments and while Blue was in, I put it in my name."

(Khadijah cackles aloud, nearly dropping her cigarette.) "You not as dumb as I thought."

Niecey, "Shut up bitch, and drive us to Dre's..now!"

Lala, "Uhh, guurrl, don't you think Blue know? No seriously, I can't be part of this.."

Niecey, "If you want any future wit' Blue you better text Dre I'm on my way wit the reup. Stop fuckin wit' me, you spoke wit' him last I'll say and make everyone in this car say you took it."

Lala turns to face Niecey, "Uh, bitch you serious!? (She removes herself from the car and talks to Niecey through her side of the window.) 'No! You got me fucked up, I'm out!"

Niecey, "You leave and thas it for you."

Lala, "Good! I can't deal wit' yo' crazy ass no way. Hell naw!"

( Khadijah leaves her seat and grabs hold of Lalas' arm as she begins to walk away.) "La! Stop..wait a second please..If you was lookin' at her come in and out the apartment earlier, notice how her pockets got bigger..and there's lumps in her bra."

Lala, "Fuuckk that. You lyin'." (Niecey lifts her bra from underneath her shirt as several mini packets of marijuana falls onto her thick lap.)

Niecey, "Blue has me count, weigh and place it into baggies every time.. He ain't missin' shit cus' he don't know."

Khadijah, "I knew I wasn't trippin' when I saw that shit."

Lala, "So what.. From the looks of it you barely have enough to reup..what we look like showin' up at Dre's wit' this little amount."

Niecey, "Worth somethin' and I'll cut you in."

Lala, "Guurrrl..I dont know."

Niecey, "All you have to do is show up. Thas' all."

Lala, "Why you can't? Shit, im good."

Niecey, "Because showin up like this, (points toward her eye) 'would look bad. He wouldn't do it."

Lala, "So you want me to go in? Real smart..Dre at least seen all of us once."

(Niecey thinks briefly her head tilts observing the supposed goldmine throughout her lap.) "You go in wit' this one over here and act like she Blue's family..who you dating and wanted to stop over for a quick reup." ( I turn my head away from the conversation and realize Niecey is starring at me.)

Lala, "No!"

Tanya, "Listen, I'll do it. Marie has no idea what we're doing."

Niecey, "It's perfect. No one will know who she is or bother because she's your girlfriend La."

Lala, "Yea..but this is Maryland we talkin' about. She don't even know what weed is!"

Niecey, "Even better, she jus family occupanied by you. Dre won't think twice."

Khadijah, "I want a cut."

Niecey, "Scuse me?"

Khadijah, "Im drivin'.Everyone in this car will be held accountable if truth lets out, or if we get stopped. I want my cut."

Niecey, "You got balls Khadijah..One fifty."

Khadijah, "Two fifty."

Lala, "Im'ma need more than jus two hundred for this shit."

Neicey, "Three fifty and thas it."

(At this moment, I feel pinned against a corner. Something in me, just flies. Literally. I think I've lost all senses and begin to motion my way out the car.)

"I'm sorry I cant."

Niecey, "All you have to do is stand there. La does all the talk."

"I don't want to do it. I don't even know Blue. If this gets out, and for some reason if Blue notices a shortage..in whatever you're doing..he's coming after me becuase I lied. No."

Niecey, "You could get two fifty."

Lala, "How much did you take?"

Niecey, "Almost two grand worth."

Lala, "Uh, bitch..where?!"

(Niecey lifts the flap of her sweatpants indicating the area is inside her panties.)

Tanya, "What about the car? He's going to ask.."

Niecey, "What about it? It's MINE. Ly-ke(like) I said. I know Blue. He never check shit. And he knows anyway."

(Lala walks away in frustration, holding her arms above her head.) "You fuckin' took it all?"

Niecey, "No. Half of this is mine anyway as a parting. Blue thinks I'll smoke it away."

Lala, "I'll do this for four hundred and im out."

Tanya, "Marie, all you have to do is jus' accompany La."

(I rub my chest, in fear they could see me hyperventilating. I begin to heavy breath and step outside of the car. Everyone looks at me in silence.)

"Im not talking at all..this is a one time thing. Right? Lala will be with me, right?"

Niecey, "Yea."

( I begin to remember the conversation my roommate and I had the other night. It's possible she could be right about girls who act 'loud' or reckless. Maybe I'm biting off more than I can chew. My world consists of my family and studies. To fully experience going with the flow is a dangerous pursuit. However, I never imagined the misadventures of a house party could turn into a drug deal. I like the concept of friendship, but not always. Being a loner, in my case, triggers ambition, focus and imagination. If I get out of this, I'm reverting to isolation.)