Officially Only Expecting the Unexpected
When Your Mind Is Running One Way and Your Body the Other...
At work bestie and I have been trying to figure out how to handle things and we thought bringing it to the boss-lady would work, but no go, she defended crazy pants. Then a couple of days ago, she made a comment about how she didn't really know anything about crazy pants and that left me wondering why. the. fuck. is. this. girl. here?!
I give it to her, she is amazing at her job, but she is not amazing with regular things, like interacting with people or life. Everything is outside of styling bridesmaids is an award nominated dramatic act. I am also big on astrology and this chica is a Gemini. I am a Pisces and Geminis, female Geminis, wear me out! They are energy succubi! I haven't met one where I didn't leave their company completely spent!
You know, writing this makes me feel a little selfish. I feel like I've made this about me and I feel bad about that. My bestie isn't here to give her side of the story and she probably wouldn't despite the fact that I am using no names and/or pics of anyone that I am speaking of. This is the thing, I have days where she is fine and I think to myself, wow, she's alright! We should go out for drinks or have tea somewhere, but as soon as the thought hits, she gives me reason to take all of those feels back. Example: We're at work and we're talking about hair and fashion while admiring one of my little doodles that I tend to do on the dry erase boards outside of the fitting rooms. I am admiring how great her hair looks and how fast it's growing out. Her answer to me is that she likes how my hair has grown out and she's just trying to get what I have, and that is why she watches my every move. She's mad that I keep changing my hairstyles because I am moving too fast for her and she is literally living vicariously through me. She was serious. There was no laughter behind it. It was freaking creepy. Despite that though, it feels like all of the higher powers are whispering for me to keep trying. They keep pulling me to a close distance from her, enough to appear present, but not too much. Girl power, Black Girl Magic, and/or any other phrases used to define sisterhood is great, as long as it's for progression, not obsession, am I right about this?! It feels like it's a longer way off than it should be to being something genuine again. I mean, does it have something to do with girls being raised by codependent women? Is it what is now officially people doing the opposite of what us 80s babies were taught, not to try everything you see on television? Is it the lack of knowing what the term "individuality" actually means or the fact that it's not even encouraged anymore? Women being different, but having common interests is what makes a friendship... do we as a gender not know that anymore?
All of this is just so very strange. I mean, our boss invited us out for a girls night and stalker magee decided against going. She feigned sick and went straight home after work. According to work bestie, she seemed to reconsider and work bestie told her to just make up her mind. We had already told boss lady that we would be there. She told boss lady she would be there. What's funny about our boss is how she so wants to believe in everyone, so when you tell her something negative about anyone, especially someone she has invested in, she sort of just doesn't hear it. She brushes past it, and that is what she did the other night when we went out to dinner. Thing is, I am on the train on the way home after this dinner and start scrolling through my IG on my phone. Up pops psycho's stories and there she is with two other friends filming her weird ass thirsty black girl show that they do on IG live and I just sighed and clicked out of it...
I haven't seen her since the other night so... I mean, what I think is probably going to happen is that this chick is going to come in with excuses because she was already on her way to that on the day of the dinner. We keep trying with her and it is just not working! I guess she should thank all the higher powers for the saintliness of our boss huh?!