Nothing Matters

Alex had given up hope. She didn't try to see the positives in any situation and she didn't care too much about the negatives either. Why? Because they didn't matter. Nothing ever mattered.

She stood in the parking lot of her not-so-conducive-for-the-mental-health-of-an-already-over-the-edge-teen-or-any-teen-for-that-matter high school and pulled a pack of cigarettes out of her back pocket. Scanning the first row, she picked out the one labelled "Frustration" and the one labelled "Anger" simultaneously. Next she pulled a lighter out of her left pocket, stuck both Anger and Frustration into her mouth and lit them both at once, taking a long drag. After all, she felt both emotions at the same time.

Was this destructive behavior? Perhaps. But that didn't matter to her nor what anybody else had to say about it. "Smokers die young" they said. But she wasn't too interested in living. Then again, neither was she too interested in dying. At least cancer is a slow death, which means she can have both life and death one after the other. Though perhaps she was already dead inside so let's say both together.

Just as she released a cloud of thick smoke, Jason walked up to her. "H-hey Alex" he stammered. Alex took the cigarettes out of her mouth to be polite. Not that she cared. "Yo" she replied unenthusiastically .

"Uh, I have something to tell you" Jason looked nervous. She raised an eyebrow as cue for him to continue.

"Will you go out with me?" he fidgeted.

Alex sized him up for about a second or two. Jason was a relatively thin kid. Not scrawny but not the broadest either. He wore round glasses with blue frames, had wavy brown hair and a pretty cute face.

Alex took a deep breath "no." he's a good kid but she can't make him happy nor was she particularly interested in doing so either. "I think that for your own good it's best we stay friends".

"For my own good?" Jason asked, hurt written all over his face.

"Yes, your own good. I'm not the kind of person you want to go out with. I have zero interest in anything. Not your well being, not my well being and not the well being of anyone or anything else. I can't make you happy." Jason didn't seem to understand. The look on his face registered confusion. Then he says;

"Alex, who do you think you are? From the rumors going around, you've turned down every guy that has ever approached you. Do you think you're special? Some kind of goddess maybe? You're not. I like you Alex. And at this point I might be the only one who does and probably ever will so why don't you give me a chance" .

Alex laughed and laughed a lot. Very loudly for that matter. She laughed like he was a comedian and indeed he was the funniest little shrimp she had ever met. She leaned off the car behind her to look him dead in the eye. She was almost a head taller than he was. Her smile, not completely menacing but not particularly nice either, if anything, it was unnerving. Unnerving enough to make emperors squirm, Jason thought. "Shrimp, I admire your courage but this has nothing to do with me thinking I'm a goddess. Did you listen to a word I said? Lol do you think I am someone that can easily be manipulated by the nonsense you spewed?" Jason recoiled.

"I appreciate it. I do. Haha even though that was a terrible proposal but my answer is still no. So thank you for liking me and for 'being the only one who and probably ever will'" Alex said using her fingers as air quotes "Thanks but no thanks. It's not going to happen." With that Alex turned from him while simultaneously crushing both cigarettes beneath her feet, grabbed all her stuff and sauntered into the school building, red-dyed hair bouncing behind her. Jason stood there for all of 2 seconds before turning around and heading in the opposite direction.

During all this, neither of the two noticed their one-man audience.

"Interesting..."