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Never Ending Love Story: What is love to you?

The Story of the Most Important Valentine’s Day of My Life

By M.J. RauschPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
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Never Ending Love Story: What is love to you?
Photo by Aung Soe Min on Unsplash

Although I never considered myself ugly or undesirable, I was never popular with the boys back in my high school years — which of course left its mark on sixteen-year-old me.

Because of that, Valentine’s Day was somehow both: utterly important and absolutely unnecessary. It didn’t matter I hadn’t had a date for the 14th as it was really just like any other day — and at the same time, the romantic in me dreamed of one perfect Valentine’s Day.

Luckily for me, a good friend of mine had the exact same problem so we both decided to spend the dreaded day together. At the time, the relationship with said friend, let's call him Jakob for now, was… weird. I had fallen for him way back when we first met but he was in love with another girl so I ignored my romantic feelings and focused on building something platonic with him. And it worked totally fine — until Jakob kissed me.

You see, although I may have been not popular with the boys back then, I was also not going to undervalue myself and be a replacement for the girl he couldn't have. I rejected his advances and things were awkward for a time. But because we made our Valentine’s plans before that whole mess and neither of us wanted to be alone I agreed to stick to our plans and hang out together.

Little did I know what was to come.

When the 14th came he visited me as we agreed to meet at my place. I can still see him, standing nervously in my doorframe loaded with a heavy bag that I had no idea what it was for. And then he smiled. I always loved his smile. Things fell into place, the awkwardness left and we just had a lot of fun this day. In the afternoon, just before his Dad would fetch him he revealed to me the content of the mysterious bag that I was not allowed to touch prior: His whole collection of Defense Devil, a Manga series I had discovered through him and was obsessed with. He said, he would lend me all volumes so I could binge through them (as he knew I had very little patience for such things) but warned me to read very carefully as he had planted some little notes for me throughout the whole series. Then he conjured a rose from the bag and asked me to be his girlfriend.

What an absolute gentleman that boy was at just fifteen.

I repeated what I had said before — that I am no one's stand-in — but he swore that he had developed feelings long before and just didn’t have the courage to ask as to not ruin our friendship. I was hesitant, very hesitant, but agreed. And so I did not only get a wonderful Valentine’s Day but also my first boyfriend.

How did things work out with Jakob, you wonder? Do I still have some kind of feelings for him? Well, next month we will be celebrating our 6th relationship anniversary! So yes; the love is only getting stronger with each passing Valentine’s Day.

What I learned from this: In the end, I don't believe in special days to remind people of general decency.

Whether it be Thanksgiving and family, All Saint's Day and the dead, or Valentine's Day and our loved ones. They should always be present, not just for special occasions once a year. Valentine's Day holds a special place in my life as it marks my relationship anniversary and my partner and I like to celebrate these kinds of milestones. Wouldn't it be that our anniversary falls on the 14th, I bet we wouldn't care much.

You are allowed to have dreams of romantic dates and magic evenings but make sure to spread them throughout your relationship and don't save them for only one day. You deserve more.

love
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About the Creator

M.J. Rausch

Geek, wannabe pedagogue and relationship Guru. Come and laugh at me - I mean with me

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