My Crush Was Crushed

For the first time in as long as I can remember, I had a crush on someone I had just met. We had so much fun and laughing so hard our insides ached at evening’s end. We met when her sister joined the pool league and played doubles with sister and mom after our matches.

How did I know I had a crush? I went to bed the night we met, thinking about her. Woke every morning thinking about her. Throughout the day I thought about her. This went on for all seven days until I saw her again. For three days after we met, I practiced what I wanted to say to her and sounding desperate and pathetic I wrote a letter on the fourth day. But revised the letter three more times.

I asked for her number and if I could give her a call. She said yes but she had a boyfriend. Luckily for me I did not mention to her any of my thoughts and feelings. Unluckily for me, I had confided with her sister and mother what I shared earlier. Hoping without hope they will not share with the sister. But if they do, the worst that could happen has already happened. I would just be embarrassed for a third time instead of just twice.

I have discovered that although I meet people cordially and respectfully, that is as far I go in knowing anyone. I have been this way since the passing of my wife a few years ago. I guess I just didn’t want the pain of loss and heartache again. It seemed from my description of the past week that I was ready to open and share my life with someone. But the simple, ‘I have a boyfriend’ stopped me dead in my tracks and it felt like a hand grabbed my heart and squeezed to the point of almost unbearable pain. But I did take solace in the comfort of the sister I shared about my crush.

Luckily for me the sisters had a disagreement, and I experienced a different person from the week before. I told my intended crush that I would be there for her, and her response was, ‘I don’t need you to be there for me’. I almost left but pledged earlier I would be an unconditional friend. I stayed and played until she stopped playing pool. Not being asked to join her at the bar after, and not offering, I left.

I decided to share this experience because I am sure a lot of people have gone through something similar or thinking of going out on a limb. I was hurt and embarrassed, but I will live through it. It’s not the end of the world, I was just trying to move on and failed at getting a relationship. But gained some good pool friends to practice playing pool.

This is one of the stories that happens on a pool league. People come to have a fun time and events like this happens. It’s life and somehow, we all seem to experience a gamut of emotions in many different ways. But always the main focus is on the match in play. Everyone is trying to win. The secondary by product is all the different events that surround the tables. At the end of the day everyone hopefully had a fun time. Putting another league night into the books.

I hope you enjoyed this story because there are very few stories that describe any kind of league activities. I plan to author more stories that look at the aspect of being a member of the APA (American Poolplayers Association). No one has ever written about the inner workings of what being in an organized pool association can do for some people. A friend and former teammate told me that the APA is her family, and I am like a brother to her. In retrospect, I genuinely believe she is right. I will leave judgement up to you in the coming stories I write about league life. Aloha.