Humans logo

My Coming Open Letter to My So-Called 'Parents': 2 Years Later

Updating everyone on how I'm doing today

By Mark Wesley PritchardPublished 2 years ago 3 min read
1

To kick off Pride Month, I want to give everyone an update about a story I wrote on Vocal back in 2020. Two years ago, I had the courage to write an open letter to my "parents", not only coming out to them for the first time, but also sharing how much they verbally and physically abused me as a kid. Plus, them not letting me be myself and also portraying themselves as victims. In case you're unfamiliar with my backstory, I grew up in Texas to Liberian parents. I'm the oldest of three children and have two younger siblings (brother and sister). While most memories of my childhood were great, there were other times when my parents would yell, berate, and belittle me (mostly about my slim figure at the time and calling me hurtful names), followed by physical violence, whether I did something right or not. Even the smallest things would irk them and the cycle repeated itself again and again. These beatings and verbal assaults occurred on a regular basis. That lasted from childhood until my early 20s. My so-called "father" was the most abusive towards me. African parents never take any responsibility for their actions, constantly play the victim card whenever confronted with their wrongdoings, and denies everything that they've done to you, refusing to apologize. Not only that, but they have told lies about me to their friends and my own relatives that weren't true. Those are the reasons why I've been estranged from them for over a decade. Parents are supposed to love their children unconditionally and accept them for who they are, not harming them. They are our first bullies and if someone shows you their true colors, believe them.

The one thing that always annoyed me and resented as a kid was being compared to others. African parents tend to do this to shame their own children, wanting them to be just like their friends or others. The problem with that is it lowers a child's self-esteem, discouraging them from achieving their dreams and goals. You have to be yourself and live the life you want, not the life your parents expect you to live.

So how am I doing after my open letter was published on Vocal and me sharing it on social media? Since I've made it public, my estranged mother and sister were furious. I refused to take the post down, because I wanted my friends and followers to see that my so-called "parents" weren't the loving people that were supposed to love and protect me. They had Jekyll and Hyde personalities, which described them perfectly. I've completely cut ties with my sister, because she was making excuses for our parent's behavior. As far as my youngest brother, I still talk to him, but the only time he reaches out to me is on my birthday. Soon after my last birthday in November 2021, I received a message from him, telling me that mom and dad still loved me. I've always doubted that claim, because if they truly loved me, they wouldn't have abused me, verbally and physically for all those years. Also, they would've accepted me for who I was and allowed me to be myself. They think that having a gay son would be embarrassing and wouldn't be acceptable to them.

Just because you're related to someone, it doesn't mean that they love you. That includes your immediate family. They can be toxic and manipulative. Distancing yourself from negative influences is nothing that you should be ashamed of. It means that you respect and value yourself more. Always surround yourself with positive people who are loving, supportive, and accepting of you. To this day, I still haven't received an apology from "those two people" and I don't think I will anytime soon. I'm okay with that. I don't refer to them as "mom" or "dad" anymore, because they don't deserve either one of those titles. They'll realize that the horrible things they have done to me has affected me forever. The memories of being abused will stick with me for life. They'll never go away. Other than that, I'm doing alright. I'm just living life the best I can and have people who love and support me.

My advice to those who are currently going through this with their families: live your best life and have a positive support system. You have my full support and stand behind you.

family
1

About the Creator

Mark Wesley Pritchard

Award-winning cosplayer, cosplay model, influencer, retro gaming fanatic, die-hard Texas Rangers fan, and nostalgic freak. Need I say more?

Threads: @thecosplayerfromtexas

Instagram: @thecosplayerfromtexas

TikTok: @thecosplayerfromtexas

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.