Love is NOT a Battlefield, Loss Is..

I am certain you’ve heard the song “Love is a Battlefield”, its more than probable that you’ve heard the term “love is war”, and you’ve more than likely told someone they are your “ride or die”, or at least something along those lines..

You’ve been taught by society, and conflicted romanticized ideologies.. that if you love someone you fight for them like your life depends on it; you know, in terms of “keeping a relationship”. We think that we are obligated to fight; that arguing with each other constantly is “healthy” because it means you’ve got something to keep working on, and to most it’s better to have that than nothing at all. Staying in a relationship where you’re walking on eggshells with someone, and constantly having to apologize for your feelings is NOT a Love that’s “end game”, no matter how much you care for them.

These asinine beliefs have cost us our sanity, and self worth; making us believe that we have a strong relationship for sticking by the side of someone who abuses, uses, or degrades us.. Because leaving, and choosing to value yourself has been made into a selfish act..

I get it! I’ve been there. I’ve said the things, done the things, and fully believed in them..

We’ve become so accustomed to heartbreak.. We’ve allowed ourselves to believe that love hurts us and tears us apart, when it’s the very opposite that makes us bitter, and scared to move forward..

Here’s the thing..

Love is a light in the darkness, it’s the very mold that holds us together, a breath of fresh air, the spark that ignites unexpectedly, and the flame that isn’t snuffed out by a winters wind.. Love is pure, whole, and true without question..

It’s doubt and fear- that keeps us stuck in a broken record, not taking that leap, and feeling like love isn’t on our side..

It’s disappointment- that leaves us questioning the what if’s, why’s, and what the f**ks..

It’s selfishness and greed- that keeps us stuck in s**ty ideological patterns of fighting with our ego. Hurting ourselves and others without regard to its impact..

It’s betrayal- that makes you “flip the switch” to your emotions, and wear a shell as self preservation from any more damage and heartache..

LOVE is NOT a Battlefield.. LOSS is!

Loss of Self- when you’ve poured every ounce of love from your veins into someone who only gives you back a few drops; and you’re left feeling empty, tattered, and worn. Looking into that shattered mirror not knowing anymore who’s looking back at you..

Loss of Faith- when you’ve spent all your time believing in someone, and something so bloody hard you mounted your feet to that mountain which turns you to stone when they crush your bones you had filled with hope..

Loss of Motivation, Hope, Dignity, Romance, Heart, and Desire..

THIS is the truth we’ve yet to grasp and accept- Love isn’t war, marriage isn’t overrated, and “the one” isn’t someone who makes you feel you’ve got to armor up over at every turn. The real thing will come without pretense, without warning, and without judgments..

It will feel like home- where you are secure within mutual respect to your boundaries, and held with honor to your integrity, where you’re comfortable and content in being yourself, are welcomed with respect, and support. Where you’re encouraged and empowered to always strive for the best! You will create compromise in compassion, and comprehension in communication..

Love doesn’t ask you to sacrifice the parts of you that make you whole and light up your soul.. It asks you to jump off that cliff of doubt, fear, negative attachments, low self esteem, false beliefs implanted by social norms, and that broken record you play that keeps you trapped from reaching your full potential..

No my friend, it’s not Love that is a Battlefield; LOSS is!