Love - Inside of Romance & Friendship

Falling in love is an experience worth living for. And the first time you fall in love, that’s a memory of a lifetime. Everyone has experienced love at one point in their lives, and its various strengths; it can lead to forming a small crush or possibly take over your body which causes one to fall in love. Love is hardly ever well-defined because everyone experiences it in different ways. One person can think it is love while another may think it’s an infatuation. Some people search for what seems their whole lifetimes for love, while others may seem to fall in and out of love on a regular basis. We can love many things, but the love between two people is only one of a kind; it’s extraordinary—it’s romantic. The connection between love and romance can tend to raise many questions. Still, there is still a lot about love that many of us have yet to understand. But that’s the power of love; we never know where it will lead us. However, in order to understand love, we need to first understand one of the main kinds of love—romantic love.

Romantic love can be often mistaken for lustful passion because it can be so consuming. Romantic lovers tend to almost always be on each other’s minds. A person can even make decisions based on his or her romantic companion. For example, that person can decide to move to a different location for a job, and decide to leave their husband or wife behind. Because many people can’t imagine life without their companion, they begin to make huge life decisions based on their love for companion. A person’s mind can be guided with romantic love, and it can sometimes cloud the mind as to what the right decision may be. According to the journal Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love, romantic love is said to last just over a year, perhaps because the brain cannot eternally maintain an accelerated state of romantic paradise. As romantic love fades, attachment love, a more stable love, sets in. To keep the passion alive, experts suggest doing satisfying and exciting activities as a couple.

Nevertheless, romantic love tends to be very self-sacrificing. Even William Shakespeare, one who was truly a supporter of romantic love, made indications to romantic love as being like drunkenness in his play, The Tempest. Romantic love can take over all senses in a person, and to some extent, change his or her point of view (kind of similar to what drugs can do to a person). It’s often difficult to make a person who is romantically in love unhappy. When you see the look in your companion’s eyes and you know that your romantic efforts have hit the mark, there's just nothing like it in a human relationship. So, it’s not a surprise that most people seek out romantic love, rather than be satisfied with the simple love shared between friends.

Now love between friends can often evolve into romantic love. As Beverley Fehr (1995) noted, the emotions and feelings that underlie “compassionate love” may be the foundation for all types of love. So, friendship gives birth to romantic love. People become more comfortable and trustworthy towards one another tending to spark up romance. The pop-singer Katy Perry refers to it as “fireworks”. There are even countless movies and stories where a lot of great friendships transformed into romantic love. One movie in particular, Jeremy (1973), where a fifth-teen year-old musician Jeremy falls in love with a girl at his high school, an aspiring dancer named Susan. Jeremy pursued Susan as a friend first then their relationship later escalated to something even more special, pure love. The bond they shared was very romantic. They were inseparable. From their very first kiss, to play dates, to even sharing a more intimate – yet innocent—affection, they saw it as being “wispy” (happy and speechless for words). How more romantic can one be towards one another? As a young couple, they both felt love—they fell in love. Even though Susan had to eventually leave Jeremy, they knew they would never forget each other and that their love was not like any other.

The love of friendship can be very strong, but it’s the emotional levels of romantic love that constantly changes the easiness of the love friends share. Nonetheless, people who are friends tend to have a special kind of love among each other. People begin to realize that meeting their companion was fate, becoming their friend was a choice, but falling in love with them was beyond their control. Because the way society is, male-female friends may experience a lot of pressure from other friends and family to change their friendship into romantic love. A friendship can grow from being a warm feeling between people to them always wanting to be around their friend— for friends like to do things together. If that person’s friend gets harmed, they would want to help their friend. Even if that person's friend was mad, that person would get mad as well. Friends who love each other want each other to be happy. This kind of love greatly explains how couples feel romantically as well. They would definitely do anything for each other, no matter what the circumstance may be.

With all this being said, love is truly inside of romance; it’s such a beautiful bliss! Romance can come in many different shapes and forms and that’s the beauty of it. It’s true that our hearts have a mind of their own. This is why it’s great to listen to our hearts. The romantic loves speaks to us and consumes all of us. It’s truly magical and an experience everyone will encounter in this lifetime. In the true beauty of love, romance definitely says it all. So why not embrace it.

References :

Fehr, B. (1995). "Love." In Encyclopedia of Marriage and the Family, ed. D. Levinson. New York: Macmillan.

Jeremy. Dir. Arthur Barron. Perfs. Robby Benson, Glynnis O'Connor and Len Bari. DVD. Production Company, 1973.

The Tempest by William Shakespeare. The Arden Shakespeare, 3rd Series. Vaughan, Virginia Mason; Vaughan, Alden T. (1999).

Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. New York, NY: Henry Hold and Company, LLC. 2004.