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It Will Get Better

What may seem like the end of the world may be the greatest thing to ever happen to you.

By Josey BrownPublished 7 years ago 3 min read

I’m sure you’ve read plenty of stories about how a breakup is not the end of the world and many people have told you, “It’ll get better and you’ll move on.” And that all seems pretty irrelevant when you’re crying into your pillow late at night missing him. But I’m here to tell you that it does get better, but it’s going to get worse before it does.

I turned 20 eight days after (what I thought was) the guy of my dreams asked me to be his girlfriend. I was in heaven and I thought that the guy I had been waiting for had finally arrived. I fell head over heels for this guy and gave him more than just my time and attention. He took my innocence and he took my fire.

As weeks went by I began to become a shell of my former self and I wouldn’t realize this until after he broke up with me. He broke up with me four days after Valentine’s Day and the night before our seven-month anniversary. It may not seem like a big deal but he was my first love and I was crushed. He told me that he didn’t love me anymore and I spent a long time, perhaps too long, thinking it was my fault.

I continued to be friends with him after he ended our relationship and still ran whenever he called to “hangout.” Looking back, it was almost sad how much I let him control me, even months after we had broken up. People will tell you it gets better after a breakup, but what they won’t tell you is that it will get worse before it does...much worse.

I still battle with the repercussions of the breakup, even though it’s been almost a year. I don’t miss him anymore, but I miss the good memories, and that was what I had the most trouble letting go of. I don’t miss the feeling of worthlessness that he gave me or the countless hours of crying over him that I’ll never get back.

I spent many nights crying into my pillow asking myself what I did wrong and what I could’ve done to keep him. I still battle those demons but not near as much. It took me a long time and a lot of being at rock bottom to realize I wasn’t the problem. He was. He brought me down and had no intentions of building me back up.

I know what you’re thinking: "Yeah, but I love him and I’ll never get over him.”

I thought the same thing. But when I realized that I deserved better, it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. I have a new boyfriend now and he’s everything I could’ve ever imagined.

He’s not afraid to talk about our future and he constantly reminds me how important I am to him. He builds me up. He believes in me. He’s held me through a complete mental meltdown and he’s talked me down when he wasn’t able to be there in person. He knows I have flaws and baggage and anxiety but he’s here and he’s here 100%. I couldn’t ask for more.

So it may seem like it’s the end of the world, and trust me it’ll feel like it sometimes, but it’ll get better. You’ll feel like you’ve hit rock bottom first, but once you pick yourself up, dust off that jerk that did you wrong, and move on with your life, you’ll finally be living your best life, just like I am. Keep your head up, baby girl, you’re stronger than you think.

breakups

About the Creator

Josey Brown

Hey y’all! I’m a 21 year old college student with a passion for writing (even though I’m a math major, weird huh?). I love to write in my spare time, not that I have much, but you should check out my posts anyway! 😊⬇️

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    Josey BrownWritten by Josey Brown

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