Introversion is a protection for introverts

Doctor David once shared an experience he had during his psychology studies at Peking University: he had always been an introverted nerd. In his sophomore year, he made up his mind to change his introverted nature and put in a lot of effort.

He gained many friends around him, receiving numerous phone calls from friends every day in the dormitory. At one point, he even earned the nickname "playboy" because he had many female friends.

However, this made him feel extremely exhausted.

He had always found joy and energy in solitude: reading, writing, watching movies... These quiet and pure activities gave him vitality and creativity.

But being extroverted was different. Although he had many friends, very few were genuine confidants. Social activities seemed lively from the outside, but being immersed in them made him feel drained and powerless.

He also noticed that he often became the one others relied on in relationships, and he didn't know how to say no.

As a result, the more people he knew, the more he was taken advantage of, as if he were gradually being emptied.

Looking back on this experience, David realized that introversion was actually a way to protect himself.

It prevented him from depleting himself excessively, giving him more time to have internal dialogues, to listen to others, and to nourish his own life.

After discovering this, David no longer viewed introversion as a negative trait. On the contrary, he cherished his introverted qualities even more.

Personality has no inherent goodness or badness; being true to oneself is what matters most.

In life, there are many "fake extroverts." Due to their roles or professional requirements, they have to forcefully blend into social circles. To outsiders, they appear to have many friends and engage in activities like karaoke, dining, drinking, and traveling...

But in reality, being in such situations consumes them mentally, and they enjoy being alone at home once the noise subsides.

Forcing oneself to be extroverted essentially overestimates the advantages of extroversion.

Being extroverted doesn't automatically mean being good at communication. Communication is a social skill that can be practiced and improved through targeted efforts.

Being extroverted doesn't guarantee popularity. In fact, some extroverted individuals struggle with their words, unintentionally offending others and pushing people away.

Similarly, introversion doesn't imply being unsociable or lacking eloquence. Many seemingly reserved individuals surprise everyone with their talents when the time is right.

Differentiating between introversion and extroversion is not about assessing their social skills but rather observing how they recharge themselves.

In simple terms, extroverts recharge through social interactions and feel bored once they are away from groups.

Extroverted personality traits include seeking breadth, focusing on external experiences, expressing emotions openly, enjoying socializing, and being quick to take action. However, they can also be impulsive and find it difficult to concentrate.

Introverts, on the other hand, gain energy through solitude. Forcing them into social situations makes them feel drained and exhausted.

Introverted personality traits include seeking depth, having a risk-averse mindset, being skilled in self-analysis, acting cautiously, and thinking deeply. However, they may appear less sociable and have difficulty adapting to new environments.

David said that extroversion rewards extroverts, while introversion protects introverts.

When you are willing, you can dive deep into the abyss of your soul. When you are willing, you can fully express yourself.

Both tendencies come with their own enjoyment.

Therefore, whether extroverted or introverted, each has its own treasures within the personality that need to be explored and its own lessons to face.

Better understanding our position on the introversion-extroversion spectrum helps us understand ourselves better, leverage our personality strengths, and adopt interpersonal communication styles that suit us best.