Inside Out

I’ve heard it said a thousand times before, ‘people want what they can’t have.’ But truth be told, Ive always been to the contrary. If it’s not mine, why would I want it. If someone doesn’t want me to have ‘it’ why would I insist? Nope. I want the cards I’m dealt.

I’ve pretty much been that easy like Sunday morning sweet potatoes pancake batter just waiting for the backyard berries on top, kind of Gal. To say I go with the flow is an understatement. Maybe it’s the Army brat in me. But my been there done that, bring it on-next best thing- way,has always appreciated life as it comes.

At the present, it’s been in more of a Clorox disinfected bow. But I had a hand sanitizer collection way before it was the ‘in thing to do’. Im the person who knew long ago that home sweet home was the safest place on earth and never left, by choice.... arguably force if you consider all the germy people who fail to wash their hands than palm and escalator. I’m still scarred from that Oprah special with the stats. Or how about the brilliant medical advice that suggests sneezing into your elbow AND greeting with elbows instead of handshakes. Anyone else see a conflict of interest? And Dear God don’t get me started on the pollution. Like I said, I’ve hop skipped and jumped continent to continent and if it’s not Asian smog it Texas pollen leaving carbon footprints all over nostrils and lungs.

It’s like one day it just clicked... I’d been inside for a few weeks and was the happiest I’d ever been! Why would I EVER leave? I’m part of a wine club that delivers to my door on autopay. I treat myself to maid service (using my own supplies of course, as to not inject others broom and vacuum pet dander- I’m animal free (pet and food wise) - love to stay that way.

Matter of fact, I was having groceries delivered when the only way to do so was via medical insurance per doctor’s write-up, not an app. My how things have changed...

In fact, the more they do the more they stay the same. It’s a fad now but

I’ve work remotely for quite a few years. Willingly and preferably. People wonder how I can survive in my shell? I tell them, ‘I thrive!’ It’s the most natural way to be. I mean I don’t recall sharing a womb with anyone...

Frankly, people get on my nerves and unless it’s like a movie or short sermon where there’s a purpose and a centerpiece, all other carrying on simply seems a distraction... I mean if I was going to the office to get my work done how is the smell of 5day old curry leftovers microwaved during a morning meeting, with the always late guy missing the bus that comes at the same time every day, and the desperate for advancement insecure chick asking too many questions; going to help me meet my deadline? I learned long ago if I could just remove the extras...aka people... I could focus on the goods. Things with substance. Accomplishing goals. Avoiding awkward chatter. Once I worked remotely, I never looked back. And as of late, I’ve been catching most movies on SnagFilms bootleg site my nephew told me about and repent via Transformation Nation or ROC online church in my pj’s, instead of in person.

There’s NEVER a reason to leave. And a thousand reasons to stay. It always baffled me when people “need” company. My first thought is, ‘if you don’t want to spend time with you- I’m sure neither would I.’ I’m not out to avoid myself. I’ve wrestled with my skeletons and the closet is clean- or at least how I like it. If there’s any elephants on the room, I’ll know it because I put them there and I can address it, dress it, move it, or leave the room. Sooo much beauty in being your own circle. The home fragrances are just how you like them, no dirty undies you didn’t leave out but have to step over, nor mix-ups with who’s is who’s toothbrush. Every meal is cleanliness verifiable and the exacting of a medium-rare cooked salmon isn’t up for debate. You make sure it’s right everytime. (Fish don’t count as real pets or meat...I digress).

From where I’m standing, it’s sunshine. Even when it’s raining. And sometimes those days are the best. Guaranteed no uninvited guests to reject their door-to/door sales or cult conversion attempts.

Just peace and quiet in it’s purest form.

Even if the records are playing, there’s nothing more soothing than your favorite jam- fast or slow. I’ve heard the mixed up statement before but need to start a petition to correct it. The saying should really go, ‘Welcome to the great INdoors.’

Then again, I’m agoraphobic.