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INFJ/INFP Facing Opposition in Relationships

Finding Inner Peace in an Extroverted World

By Mattie M.Published 6 years ago 4 min read
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Make inner peace with the opposition in your life. Life is filled with opposition from the day we’re born. Through the years, as INFJ/INFP core personality, I was the master escape artist, avoiding conflict, avoiding opposition, avoiding facing my deepest emotions, deepest feelings, deepest thoughts. Life hits hard when you’re an introvert, for the simple reason we’re not about conflict, drama, and the complexity of life. Introverts love calmness, quietness, inner peace, and serenity.

When we’re forced into opposition and conflict, we buck like a wild horse, resist the changes, resist the inner transformation which must take place. INFJ’s/INFP’s can kick, wrestle with Extroverts, and are natural revolutionists, rebels, advocates, and activists. In many ways, Introverts don’t like their wild hearts being tamed by dominate Extroverts who are a whole different breed. Often, they’re misunderstood by Extroverts. Introverts and Extroverts speak two different languages.

INFJ’s/INFP’s are creative, innovative, artistic, geniuses, and often find it difficult to fit in this world. They never quite fit in any social group, and while they can participate, adapt, and adjust, they both never quite buy into the conditioning of society, culture, politics, religion, and education. All of us can be on our best behavior, inside we still question everything. We tend to be truth seekers, and we always ask why? Until we’ve beaten the dead horse in answering our million and one questions, the INFJ/INFP is rarely satisfied with just buying into what they’re told by a dominate Extrovert.

Often Extroverts will label Introverts as trouble makers, for the simple reason Introverts are not Authoritarian, nor like the, “Break the Will”, “Break them Down”, Mindset. Introverts know naturally individuals transform and change in the natural life cycles, they don’t need to emotionally and mentally abuse others for the sake of harming others for money, power, and greed.

INFJ’s/INFP’s are natural, born empathetic leaders and teachers. We respect the natural cycles of life, the natural order of the universe, the natural instincts, the natural intuition, the natural organics of life. The natural navigation system is very accurate, but in society the consensus asks the Introvert to deny their natural inner navigation system.

INFJ’s/INFP’s get gas-lighted by Sensors and Thinkers. Rarely is it intentionally, but from lack of knowledge, education, wisdom, and insight. Sensors and Thinkers must accept Introverts and believe there is more to life than just the logical and practical. “What you see is what you get.” This is the surface of life, the frosting on the cake, and the feminine and masculine are multi-dimensional. There are various sub-selves which need to be integrated in the psyche. One becomes whole and complete through time, education, experience, evolving, growing, and transforming through relationships.

Through long-term relating we grow, evolve, and reach our full potential. The hook-up generation is quite a disaster. This is short-term gains, short-term pleasure, short-term growth.

Disconnection, detachment, divorce, separation, all have one thing in common.

This is cutting off the love supply, cutting off life, cutting off emotions, the cutting off feelings, cutting off the finances, and disembodying the thoughts. This is like cutting off the circulation in our bodies. If there is no clear path of circulation for our emotions and feelings, the emotional blocks become like blood clots. The longer the emotions get blocked, the more the Introvert will get frozen in their emotions, frozen in fear, and become fixed focused on the injury.

Through every encounter we have with the masculine or feminine there is inner transformation.

Introverts will feel the emotional and mental pain in this situation, and they will naturally avoid relating with others, because they respect the natural order of things, they know every relationship ends in death, grief, and emotional and mental pain. Either through the separation or divorce, or physical death. Everything which begins also has an ending.

INFJ’s/INFP’s are empaths, this consists of deep emotion, deep feeling, deep intimacy, deep compassion, deep passion, and they usually can’t imagine connecting themselves short-term to many individuals, because this means unnecessary pain for the sake of experiencing pain. It’s easy to say if you place your hand over a fire on the stove, you will learn after a few times not to stick your hand back in the fire. The same thing with short-term relationships, short-term gains, and short-term pleasures.

There’s a cause and effect to every action, thought, feeling, and behavior. INFJ’s/INFP’s rather invest in long-term relationships, long-term gains, and invest in relationships that they receive and give 100%.

In dating and relating short-term gains, are not a good investment emotionally, mentally, spiritually, physically, financially, and sexually for INFJ’s/INFP’s. This will feel more like grief, depression, anxiety, and intensity, and when forced to participate in short-term relationships there is not strong foundation. They seek security, stability, safety, and while they accept the losses and gains in life, they rather not create more pain than they necessarily need to experience in life or cause other individuals pain for the sake of creating the experience of pain.

INFJ’s/INFP’s must learn to accept other individuals make their choices to participate in opposition, conflict, short-term relationships, and that everyone is not on the same soul path. In finding inner peace within themselves, they learn it’s natural and healthy for them not to participate if it is harmful to themselves, set personal boundaries with others who enjoy short-term relationships, and accept what’s healthy for others might not be healthy for them.

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About the Creator

Mattie M.

Mattie loves uplifting individuals in a more positive direction. She is a poet, short-story writer, and working on her first novel. Writing for a cause to pay for publishing and the editing of my novel on Depression and Anxiety.

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