I was an Introvert until I did this...

Yes, it’s true, I was very introverted growing up in Kentucky in an upper-middle-class family in the 50s and 60s, saddled with low self-esteem. Add to that multiple doses of wearing glasses, being overweight, very tall, and a home life that was a struggle. I was introverted and when given the choice I preferred to be alone with a book or music or walking the farm fields with my Beagle hound. I made good grades and did not get into much trouble so I kind of blended into the background in most social situations. I really didn’t excel at anything and did not have any special skills to pave the way for positive social interactions. I was not an athlete, did not play the guitar, have a cool car, date any girls, had no real best friends, so for all intents and purposes my life was just plodding along with no real direction. I was just invisible.

There was no one in my life who encouraged me to do better until my senior year in high school, in 1969, when Mrs. Moore, my English teacher, took an interest in me and encouraged me to write. I have had a good career that involved a lot of writing along the way so Mrs. Moore’s faith in me paid off.

But it was not until I graduated from high school, and completed one year of college that I started to believe in my self-worth and realize that I needed to get away from my hometown and change my life in a very radical way.

In 1970, against my father’s wishes, I attended a local Black College that had very few white students and thrust me into a world that caused me to become more isolated and introverted, as I had no idea how to relate to my fellow black students, and took the easy way by only seeking out other white students, who were more than happy to talk to me as they were having their own problems fitting in. Add to that mix a growing Black Power Movement, and the Civil Rights Movement in general and you had a powder keg that eventually blew when riots broke out on campus and I learned the true meaning of “duck and cover.”

Then I met Jerome. He was a handsome black man from Philadelphia, drove a cool red VW bug, was athletic, smart, and not impressed by all the violence that was percolating just below the surface on campus. We became friends because we shared a lot of the same values and world views. He did not want to change the world or make a big splash. He just wanted to complete school, go back home, get married and live a happy life. I am sure that he did all those things and more, so when we parted ways it was sad but he was a senior, soon to graduate and I was a freshman, trying to decide what to do next. He gave me a wonderful gift because he convinced me that I could transform myself into a completely new person if I just got away from this Southern town and started over in a more liberal part of the world, like California. After some research, I discovered that you could go to college tuition-free after living in the state for one year. I mean, after all, it was California, home of the Beach Boys!

It was Jerome who taught me to take action and not let life just carry me along. Actually, it was mostly Jerome and partly Beach Boy album covers that influenced me to take radical action to change the course of my life. I wanted to be a better version of myself and I knew that I could not do that in my small town with small-minded people who always fought against change and just wanted everything to remain the same.

As we know now, “times they were a-changing”, so I took action. After completing my freshman year I sold all my worldly possessions, packed a few bags, bought a plane ticket for San Diego, and flew away in June of 1970. When I announced my plans, my parents were upset but secretly believed that I would not really go through with such a radical plan. After I left they just told everyone that I would never last a month, would run out of money, get homesick, and hightail it back to Kentucky. In fact, they figured I would be so broke and scared that they would have to wire me money for the plane ticket home.

Frankly, I was terrified! I was so introverted and suffered from low self-esteem that this very act of actually getting on that plane was way outside my comfort zone, but I attribute this huge decision to saving me from a life of mediocrity and sadness. I believed that the Beach Boys were on to something and I needed to find out more.

My California stories will start soon and they will prove that true courage comes from doing the hard things in life. Leaving home with no guarantees and no safety net was very hard, but somehow I knew that this was something I had to do. So I flew thousands of miles away, to the crazy land called California and never looked back. I stayed for ten years and never regretted it for a moment.

I had some great times in California and I had some bad times. But in the end, I lost a lot of my awkwardness (and a lot of weight), became less introverted, and dramatically changed the course of my life.

You can follow me on this journey and see for yourself what it was like living on the beach, going to college, concerts, drugs, girls, hippies, close calls, and many other stories. As I said before, I have never regretted a moment and would do it all over again.