I Just Wanna Live

All my life, all I have ever wanted to do is make a difference and help people. I have so many passions that run through my blood, tiny little ships that speed through my veins constantly. Creating joy and instilling positivity in others ultimately is where my heart lives and thrives. I have so much love in my soul it overwhelms me sometimes: talking about social issues in class or reading a moving piece of writing from one of my students are simple things that make me tear up because I just care so (too) much. But I would not ever want to change that about myself, I don’t think passion is ever something to belittle.

Adventure was my first passion. I saved any coin, big or small, that I could to set myself off across the world. I travelled with friends, by myself, couch surfed based solely on the trust and goodness of others, stayed in run-down hostels, and took chances with strangers everywhere I went. I believed the world had my back because I had its. Sia Fernandez was my angel I met while solo-travelling California, lending me shelter, his vehicle, time, food, and wisdom. When I couldn’t understand why he was being so kind with no expectations, he said something I’ve continued to base the rest of my life on, “anything for good people.”

I went to university, after traveling and working for a few years after high school, to become a teacher - major in English, minor in Physical Education. While going through school, I continued to travel when I could and also taught snowboard lessons at a local hill where I got to share something I love with people every weekend. While teaching, I also got to better my own practice and found even more enjoyment while gliding through the crisp snow and crashing into miscellaneous objects trying new tricks. I went to many different mountains over the past few years: Jasper, Revelstoke, Lake Louise, Fernie, and am still amazed every time at what this earth has created for us. Spectacular views, a way to have fun with mother nature’s wicked white winters, and a place to live as free, hard, and wild as one wants.

This was also the time I found a passion for weightlifting: pushing my body to its limits, being better than I was the day before, and nourishing my body is every way I could. I was completely engulfed. I spent my extra time when I was not in school or at work to research and execute new training strategies, try new recipes, make a mess of my kitchen, and to post videos of all of it to share with others through Instagram.

Experimenting with food and learning about macronutrients quickly began to consume my life. I loved learning and I think more than that, I loved sharing my knowledge with others. I began to prepare for a bodybuilding competition that would soon lead to two more after. I decided to record my bikini prep for the show with YouTube, and once again, wouldn’t you know it--I fell in love with the process. Everything about what I was doing I was so proud of. Juggling school, working almost full time, challenging myself to become a bodybuilder, documenting it on social media, and being able to help others by sharing my experience… it was an amalgamation of so many difficult, promising, and motivating aspects all while trying to live a normal university life. I didn’t really realize how inspiring and chaotic my life was until now writing about it, and I’m so happy to say I’m proud of what I was able to accomplish.

YouTube quickly became something I loved. I was always a creative person; I enjoyed painting, poetry, dance, and more. So to be able to tackle yet another form of creating was completely up my alley. I was able to reach a wider audience, and document and share in a more honest and casual way. Although I don’t compete anymore, I still love health and fitness and worked and received with certification with Precision Nutrition two years ago.

I coach online now alongside my full-time job and love to help direct and teach and guide all these incredible people into a life of healthy living and balance. This, alongside teaching, raising a puppy, and creating a small business called Stones + A Poem (where I create homemade jewelry and send them out with a handwritten, personal poem), has me leading quite a busy life. I love being in the classroom and being the teacher the kids are excited to see, the one they want to share their excitement with, or alternatively, be the person they feel comfortable opening up to with their problems. Teaching English allows me to share my own personal experiences and stories in the classroom to hopefully inspire my students to go out and live their lives fully and truly the way they want. That is my biggest wish for all of them: to simply live a blissful and fulfilling life. Thinking about them being able to do that, knowing the struggles they have already gone through in their young lives, could make me cry. I just love the kids so much.

What it all comes down to is that my passion is living--being a good person and making everyone’s day brighter if I can. I just love people and I believe there is so much goodness in the world. And it is our job, if we can, to bring out that goodness in others. The world is much too full of love, adventure, and passion to let anyone live as though it is not.