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How to Respond to 30 Mean Ways Your Boyfriend Could Hurt Your Emotions

by berry li 10 days ago in love
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Many people find relationships to be difficult. Here are the deal-breakers and what to do if your boyfriend emotionally abuses you.

What should you do if your lover emotionally abuses you? Your tears? Do you ignore him while you wait for an apology for a few days? Each of us has a strategy.

However, there are a few things you can do to enhance the relationship and learn from the scenario if you want to move on from it.

However, if he consistently causes you emotional harm, consider other options. He won't change if he understands what he's doing and keeps doing it. Anyway, here's what to do if your lover emotionally harms you.

Deal-breakers when your lover emotionally abuses you

It's typical for partners in a relationship to inadvertently do each other harm on occasion. No person is flawless. However, it is a major issue if your lover consistently causes you emotional harm.

There are numerous other issues in relationships that need to be absolute turnoffs. Therefore, there is a good likelihood that your partner is engaging in at least one, if not all, of these behaviors when he emotionally abuses you.

Look at it now.

1. Low regard

Respect should be shown to every living person. It doesn't matter if you're the king, the CEO of a firm, a janitor, or even destitute. All persons should be treated with respect because they are all people.

So, if you discover that your boyfriend disrespects you frequently, it's time to reconsider your relationship.

2. Selfishness

The majority of people naturally exhibit at least a modicum of selfishness. It is actually a survival instinct that has existed since the beginning of human history.

However, self-centeredness has no place in love relationships. Not always can one person have their way. Extreme selfishness should not be tolerated because being in a partnership is a two-way street.

3. Neglect of the mind or emotions

There are many different types of abuse, and they are all harmful. Abuse of the mind and emotions is terrible because it undermines a person's sense of value and self-worth.

It should not be accepted when someone calls you worthless, ugly, overweight, no-good, and other derogatory terms. And always keep in mind that just because someone says something negative about you doesn't mean it's true!

4. Violent abuse

Abuse of any kind is unacceptable, as we previously stated. However, it is illegal for your lover to touch you in a way that causes you emotional harm.

Nobody has the right to harm another person physically. And no, regardless of what you done, you don't deserve it. Therefore, all physical abuse should stop right away.

5. withholding affection or sex

There is a lot of affection and sexual intimacy between the two persons in a healthy relationship. There should be some even though various persons have varied demands and drives in those areas.

Therefore, it is simply cruel if you discover that he is denying you intimacy or affection on purpose.

6. Receiving no response

Although we spoke about how terrible any form of abuse is, it is as terrible to treat someone in silence.

It is indeed abuse as well, it's just not as visible. He is essentially denying your existence if, for any reason, he is ignoring you by giving you the quiet treatment. Nobody should ever treat another person in that manner.

7.Not paying attention to you

Not everyone is an excellent listener. Some people, though, are just plain rude. Anything from failing to look up from the football game he's watching to the video games he's playing could be the cause. Or, it can simply be the case that he doesn't pay attention to your requirements when you voice them.

Lack of listening skills will not lead to a good relationship and is a blatant indication that your guy is disrespecting you on an emotional level as well as being a bad person in general.

8. Is unconcerned with your requirements

Perhaps you do let him know what you need, but he ignores you.

He should be considerate of your needs, whether they are for greater emotional or sexual intimacy or even for him to assist with household duties. Even if he agrees to adjust and pay more attention to your needs, he may only be a talker.

9. Making minimal effort

Deal-breaker: If you believe that your relationship is a one-way street. A partnership can only succeed if both parties put up an equal amount of effort.

So, you can't continue supporting both sides of this relationship if you feel like you're in a relationship with a brick wall *because brick walls just sit there and do nothing.

10. Refuses to accept "no" as an answer.

If he is excessively egotistical, he probably won't accept rejection. He might pressure you until you give in, for instance, if he wants to have sex but you're not feeling it.

Or, if you're too worn out to do his laundry but he insists, he might make you. If your guy doesn't respect you when you say "no," you have a serious problem on your hands and it's obvious he purposely harms your feelings.

11. Seclusion

Abusing boyfriends or husbands frequently cut them off from their friends, families, and even the rest of society.

He must be intentionally preventing you from communicating with or seeing the important people in your life. He doesn't want you to mention what a terrible partner he is to them. He can manage you better if he keeps you apart.

12. Money mismanagement

He may also be abusing your finances if he is dominating and isolating you. Perhaps he won't let you work and won't give you any money for food or petrol to get to work. Or, if you have a job, he expects that you give him more money than your fair share. He can also be enmeshed in vices like losing money at gambling.


When someone wants to make the other person doubt their sanity, they use gaslighting.

For instance, perhaps you saw him texting someone else. When you bring it up to him, he not only denies it but also makes you feel ridiculous for even considering it.

14. Maintaining score

Yes, there should be balance in a relationship. Equal effort should be made by both parties. But it's wrong if you are aware that he is either covertly or not so discreetly keeping track of everything you do. He most likely uses this against you as well.

15. Threats

Threats can take many different shapes. It might threaten to dump you, hit you, stop giving you money, or do anything else.

Despite his threats, it's obvious that your boyfriend is making you feel bad. Threats cannot be tolerated.

16. Out-performing you

It's possible that all you want to do when you get home from work is tell your lover about your horrible day. He should listen to you, provide you consolation, and assure you that everything will get better.

But instead, he outdoes you by relating how much terrible your day was. Or that your day wasn't all that bad because his life is harder than yours.

17. Refusal to fix issues

Both of you and he likely are aware of the issues in your relationship. However, you are the only one making an effort to resolve any of your problems.

He never alters his behavior to improve anything no matter what you bring up for debate.

18. invades your personal space

He is violating your privacy if you realized that he knows the passwords to your laptop or phone.

He should let your information be your own, whether he forced you to give it to him or discovered it on his own.

19. Not important

You need to put your spouse first in a relationship. Therefore, it makes sense that it would hurt you emotionally if it seemed like his friends, drinking, playing video games, sleeping, working, or anything else was more important to him than you. You must come in first on his list. If you're not, then the relationship isn't very strong.

What to do if your boyfriend emotionally abuses you

Let's look at what to do when your boyfriend causes you emotional harm now that you are aware of some of the deal-breakers.

It's common for partners in relationships to dispute. There is, of course, a limit. If you fight every hour, you might want to reevaluate your relationship. Aside from that, though, disagreements are an indication of a strong connection.

There's a danger that one of you will unintentionally say the wrong thing or harm your partner's feelings during those arguments. Does this imply that the romance is over? Most of the time, no. Although it could take a few days, relationships normally recover.

1. Express to him your hurt feelings.

He won't understand how you feel if you don't express them. He's not a mind reader, despite the fact that you presumably think he should be able to figure it out. It will take him days to realize it even if he does.

Talk to your lover face-to-face about how he has emotionally harmed you. Let him know you were hurt by it and why. If he is unaware of what he done, how can he get better?

2. Describe your emotions

Even if you tell him that you were hurt, he still could not get why. His viewpoint on specific circumstances can be different from yours.

So, after telling him your feelings were hurt, be sure to explain why in more detail. He must imagine himself in your position.

3. Avoid being a passive-aggressive.

Acting passive-aggressively won't make him pay for what he did, despite the fact that you presumably want him to.

Instead, the feelings stew within you until you lose control. You don't want to lose your cool and start yelling at him. It is unfair to everyone.

4. Let him make amends

Give him the chance to apologize once you've expressed your feelings and given reasons for them.

He'll comprehend what he did and apologize for hurting you if he truly feels awful about it. Then, forgive him and proceed to put the incident behind you.

5. Allow him to talk

You should give him the freedom to express himself. Maybe there was a huge misunderstanding, or maybe he just doesn't realize how much he wounded you.

You'll learn where you disagree and how you need to improve your communication by allowing him to speak.

6. Does this occur frequently?

Arguments between couples frequently occur; this is nothing new. But how frequently does this occur? Is the argument that keeps coming up the same one?

If the conversation has gotten out of hand, consider whether you need to alter your strategy. Or test his level of interest.

7. Don't shout

Increasing your level of rage won't help you solve a problem.

Maintain your composure. When you're emotionally charged, it can be difficult, but if you scream and shout, there's very little opportunity of talking about the real issue.

8 Permit him to inquire

He likely wants to ask you some questions. Perhaps he fears a brawl will break out as a result. But you must maintain your composure because of this. Listen carefully because those inquiries may hold the key to finding the solution.

9. Any solutions?

It's wonderful to discuss the issue, but you should also propose a solution. If not, the conversation was useless.

Think about how you can approach the issue as a group when you sit down. Participate in problem-solving together; a relationship requires two persons. You can't just get slammed with it.

10. Assess your partnership.

Look at your relationship if you've done everything on this list a thousand times. Is this someone you really want as a companion if they're not trying to improve or doing this on purpose? Your boyfriend abusing you emotionally is wrong, and no one should have to go through that.

11. Make room for yourself

Give yourself some space if you share a home or regularly interact with your partner. When you spend too much time with someone, it might get stressful.

Take some time alone to think about what happened if he injured you. There could have been anything you could have done to make a difference.

Come out of a disagreement stronger as a relationship. Utilize these suggestions if your boyfriend emotionally abuses you and find a way to turn the situation around.


About the author

berry li

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