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How To Fix A Marriage After Trust Is Broken (Trust Issues Between Husband And Wife)

Couples often wonder how to fix a marriage after trust is broken especially if much damage has already been done to the marriage? Can you fix trust issues between husband and wife with just a simple "I'm sorry?" It may be a good start but it's certainly not enough.

By Mark JanePublished 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago 6 min read
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A no trust marriage is a marriage suffering from trust issues that disrupts the relationship between the husband and wife. Rebuilding trust in your marriage after lies is one of the most difficult things to do. However, despite the difficulty, rebuilding trust in your relationship is very important. Trust is a vital part of any relationship and your trust is necessary if you want to keep your relationship healthy and growing.

True trust grows gradually over time, and this is why long term relationships such as a marriage can fully rest in trust. Also, this gradual growth of trust is the reason why once the trust is broken, it's even harder to recover. With that being said, time can mend the trust issues you're facing in your marriage. However, there are some steps you can take during this time of recovery to fix a no trust marriage so you can re-establish a deep level of trust.

The first step is to open up about what caused the breach of trust. This is important because both you and your partner need to understand what happened to cause that person to break the trust. If you're willing to rebuild trust in your marriage you must listen to the thoughts and feelings that lead up to the breaking of trust. This is the fundamental step towards opening the line of forgiveness and initiating a new commitment to one another.

The next step is to learn how others have gone through the same trust issues you are going through now. Many marriages have survived dangerous trust issues that threatened to take their marriage apart. Read up on the specific type of trust issues you are dealing with and see how other couples have overcame similar challenges.

Lastly, to fix a no trust marriage you have to allow time to rebuild the trust. There is no fast route to rebuild the trust you had. So you must continue to make new commitments and keep them over and over again. TIme really can rebuild trust, and it is time that will rebuild that foundation of trust your relationship needs. You and your spouse should continue to keep the commitment you have to one another and eventually you will regain that trust you once had, and this time it will be stronger and better than before.

3 Steps To Trusting Your Spouse After An Affair

There is that old but very true cliché that every good relationship or marriage is founded on trust.

In the event of an affair, this trust becomes shattered and the marriage is effectively prone to falling apart. It is very difficult for both partners to survive infidelity in marriage - in particular, if you're the injured person, trusting your spouse after an affair can be a very painful and challenging process.

You probably do want to trust your spouse again, but sometimes you may want some sort of concrete proof that the cheating spouse is no longer lying to you. That he or she has not relapsed back into the old ways. You may not even trust yourself because, like most other people, you may be wondering how you missed all the signs or whether it was your fault to begin with.

None of this is your fault. You have to believe this first of all!

Also you have to want to make the marriage work, and you have to believe that it is possible to rebuild trust in marriage after infidelity.

Restoring a marriage which has been infiltrated and damaged by lies requires a new foundation of trust - one that needs to be built one step at a time. Analyzing the cheating spouse's every move is not the best way of spending your time, energy or money - sooner or later, if your spouse is making an effort and working to make himself or herself more trustworthy, you will just have to let go and start trusting your spouse again after an affair.

As the injured person, you probably just want to know, with conviction, that the cheating spouse is working very hard toward a complete character change - rather than just making a superficial apology.

There are some steps you can take which can help you and your spouse survive infidelity in marriage. You can adapt these to your specific situation, and start making huge strides towards trusting your spouse after an affair:

1. Identify and Outline Situations that trigger mistrust.

Take a look at the last week or month in your life - if you're the injured person, what were those things that happen that triggered feelings of mistrust? For example, does your imagination go crazy if your husband is 30 minutes late from work and hasn't thought to call and let you know? Or do you imagine the worst if you try calling your wife at work but there is no answer and her cell phone is switched off? If you're the cheating spouse, how have you behaved (or failed to behave) in the past which could make your partner paranoid? For example, can you help your partner in dealing with infidelity by eliminating these triggers? You could come home on time or call if you will be late, and making yourself contactable by phone.

2. Work to increase openness and transparency

Both partners should try and be more open with each other. As the injured spouse, you should be more open about your feelings, and the things that induce paranoia and mistrust in your mind. As the cheating spouse, you could consider ways in which you could be more contactable throughout the day, and generally more open about what you're up to. Maybe you could agree a time in the day to call and have a chat about what you've been up to.

3. Disable the triggers one by one

Every day, pick a personal mistrust trigger and work together on sucking the life and power out of that trigger. This could be based on Step 2, for example, and being more open about your work life (as the cheating spouse) if you don't normally reveal much about it. Then be sure to come back around to tackle this trigger again after a few days, until it truly has no power over the course of your marriage.

The cheating spouse should, rather than feel like he or she is "checking in", think of this new behavior like adding a new and exciting dimension of transparency to the marriage. Like a declaration of your willingness to regain trust after an affair, and your dedication to saving the marriage. Otherwise, it is likely that resentment can set in and adversely affect the process of rebuilding relationship trust.

Transparency will be of paramount importance during this growth and repair process as you try to survive infidelity in marriage. The process of rebuilding trust in marriage and trusting your spouse after an affair will take a lot of effort, and you both need to make a commitment to making things work and communicating with each other in different ways from what you may be used to.

Rebuilding relationship trust after an affair is usually the biggest hurdle that couples face when trying to repair a marriage.

Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.

Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage. To learn more visit: Steps to Save Your Marriage

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