High frequency chat with the opposite sex

There is a hot search online: "Can high frequency of chatting produce good feelings?"

A significant portion of these netizens are pouring out their experiences, and it is undeniable that.

Most of the netizens, online with the opposite sex across the screen produce a good feeling.

In other words.

It's easy to get the illusion that "I love you" when you keep chatting with someone of the opposite sex with high frequency.

This reminds me of the case of a female reader.

She said she met a guy on a social media platform and started "online chatting" with him.

For half a month, they talked every day until late.

Unknowingly, she found herself falling in love with this guy, and fell deeper and deeper.

Once the boy did not respond in time or did not take the initiative to find her, her heart would feel lost, depressed and sad.

She is not sure if her feelings are love or "illusion".

In fact, "virtual online love" is not a good feeling, but may also be a new feeling.

-01

The halo effect: the magnified "good"

What is the halo effect?

It's when we ignore all of the flaws in the other person because of one of their strengths.

That is, we often say "love".

If you like a person, you will like all the qualities of that person.

The online chat will amplify the "attractiveness" of the opposite sex in your mind.

For example.

You're chatting with each other and you find that you two have similar outlooks and a lot of common topics.

The two of you have a lot in common. You don't feel tired of talking late every day, but you feel fresh.

You are sad if you don't get a response from the other person.

If the other party did not take the initiative to find you, you will be lost.

This chatting good feeling and similarity will let you ignore his looks, personality, character, and other characteristics.

After all, you can't see the other person's expressions and demeanor even through the phone screen.

Psychologists believe that the good feeling generated by online chatting will be carried over to the "offline" by two people.

At least at the beginning of the offline relationship, the good feeling for each other will not decrease.

Unless the other person brings you offline feelings then the online good feelings are much worse.

The "difference in feeling" is too big to reduce the good feeling you have for him.

For example, the word "naked".

If you meet offline, you find that the other person's looks and you see the photo compared to the gap is too big.

The online him, completely rely on beauty and retouching to bring you the illusion of a good feeling.

Such feelings are fake, with deceptive.

-02

Online chat, will lower each other's "defensive psychology"

In reality, we have to deal with all kinds of people every day.

We put on different masks and pretend to be different when we are in contact with different people.

It is difficult to reveal our true feelings to people around us, and we tend to hide our inner thoughts.

When chatting online, communicating with someone of the opposite sex you don't know will lower your defenses.

There is a term in psychology called "degree of self-exposure".

The more you expose yourself, the greater the likelihood of a good feeling.

At least, in your subconscious mind, you think that the other person can be trusted.

Chatting online through a screen gives us a sense of "security" and we are more open to it.

Have you ever felt this way?

When chatting with each other online, you are willing to reveal more of your heart and express more of your thoughts and emotions.

In reality, when you chat with your friends, you are reserved and you will weigh your thoughts several times in your mind before you speak.

Chatting with the opposite sex online is a process of mutual "curiosity".

The more curiosity you have, the more good feelings you will have.

-03

The high frequency of chatting amplifies our "desire to share"

One of the conditions for love is the desire to share.

The stronger the desire to share, the deeper the bond between two people.

In other words.

The deeper you two talk, the more frequently you chat, and the greater the likelihood of generating good feelings.

The two states of feeling are inevitably different when you talk for 1 hour in 10 days and 10 hours a day.

When two people have a higher desire to share, it also means that the higher the "overlap" in each other's lives.

This is the condition of love.

Similarity, desire to share, curiosity, trust, and dependence.

When these factors are magnified, two people will inevitably develop a good feeling for each other.

So, is online chatting reliable?

Can you trust the love that comes from chatting with the opposite sex with high frequency?

These are the questions that arise for everyone.

The basis of judgment is simple and can be based on two aspects.

First, with each other, whether to produce "exclusivity".

Love can make people jealous and possessive; and possessiveness is exclusivity.

That is to say: you want the other party can only chat with you so passionately, and you will only maintain such a degree of ambiguity with each other.

Second, see if you are willing to invest in each other for material satisfaction.

Frequent chatting is only emotional an emotional investment.

And the conditions for loving someone also include material satisfaction.

Are you willing to get to know each other better?

Will you give each other some gifts, create a surprise or romance for each other?

From another point of view.

The other party chatted with you at a high frequency before they liked you; can it be understood that the other party liked you first, so they were willing to keep chatting with you at a high frequency?