Heart break to betrayal

I don't even know where to start.I could start from the beginning. like from child hood.

''Go ahead said, The Interviewer. said.''What ever makes you happy,or comfortable. It your show Marques.

''Me, and my brother was real close growing up. We mostly was raised by our Dad.

Due to our passing of our mother .Sadie Jenkins. She passed due to complications of cancer. I was like 9,and my little brother was 6.He didn't really understand what really going.I knew what was going on, besides our family need to be strong to get through this.

My father had a hard time processing this tragic event .That was going to change our lives. The last 5 months of her life. It was unbarable. My mother was loosing her looks every day.

It was killing my father. To see his queen going through this.Cause that what she was. He treated her like greatest thing on earth.

I never heard them argue. Not once.Even if they did. It probably got straighten out before they got around us. They was like one of them perfect T.V sitcoms. We was the perfect families.

My Father ,when he was like a black superman.6'4 240 Pound of muscle. When we use to play with him me, and my brother use to jump all over on him. He got one arm, I got the other. We would play for hours,Until I mother cuts us offs.

When she wasn't looking ,we start all over again. My father was a big kid at times.Like we be playing ,since he bigger than us. He plays a little rough. We break stuff. He immediately blames us.

The funny thing ,our mom would come in. She knew right off the bat. who was it. Man we had times together. We used too try to cook things for my mom as surprised. before she got sick. to be productive. As she called it .Her job would end late. We know she be too tired to cook for us.So we would surprise her at dinner. Or well tried to surprise.

My father was a fireman. He would almost burn the house down. Trying too cook.

She would come home, see us kicked us out.Start cooking dinner, Don't matter what time is it. I can tell in her face she was tired. But you would never know. She be smiling the whole time.

Nine hours at work The smell of her fragrance black honey smell freshy new .I remember when would be eating .Her cooking wasn't good. it was the greatest. All my years of living on this earth. I've never experience anything like momma cooking.

We would be at the table. devouring our food. She was just smirk ,and tell us to slow down. She always said''Food ain't going nowhere.

We love Sadie, so much.I use to see my father comes into the house , see my mother jump allover her. Like we would be doing. It kind of weird. seeing him doing that because. When he was around us he was superman.

Around Sadie. He was lil George. While he be laying up under.While she rubs his head. Cooing ,funny but weird.me ,and my brother laugh at him all the time. We love our life. We had everything, we had each other. My fav number was 4 ,cause it represented us four.

The used to dance for hours.when they was home. Playing their favorite song '''Stevie Wonder ''You knock me off my feet. They played that song for hours.

They met at a Stevie Wonder concert.

My mom started to complaining bout headache's. So one day she fell out. At work. Our grandmother picks us up after school.Like we normally do.This time we went to her house.

We was there longer than usual. It was getting late.I heard my father voice down stairs.

I went to go peek to see, what was going on. As I'm approaching I Heard a loud cry. As I get closer .I seen my grandmother consoling my father.

I quickly ran to my father. I'll ask him ''what wrong daddy?. He looked up looking lost.I was shocked. Cause I never heard him cry. Ray came down the stairs. To see what the commotion was all about.

''My grandmother telling us to go back, get ready for bed. We was clearly spending the night. We ask where mama was. My grandma voice breaking.

I grab Ray, and helped him get ready. for bed. As we layed down .We can still hear the cries

The Next couple of days, we stayed at my grandmother house. We will ask questions about momma .When can we see her. They just brush us off. We barely see our father. He started to lose hope. Eyes had bags on it. He was crying all the time.

Months passed. I say about three months. We still at out grandmother house. We hated it there. Grandma had too many rules.

One day we picked up. We driving ,back home. We under the impression that we have to get more things to go stay at grandma house.

We open the door. It our momma at the door. Greeting us. We just was so happy we ain't really notice her.

She lost a lot of weight. her hair was gone. My mom had long silky hair. Ray blurted out mama why you looked like that. I can remember the ackward silence. My father very emotional. They didn't say it. I knew she was sick. Very bad.

Beside her greeting us. She had no energy. She just cough, and spit .Our father told us to go to our room. We went .I went to crack the door a lil. Tp see what they was talking bout.

''I can hear my mom telling my dad. ''You have to be ready for this. My father replied, he don't care. He don't want to hear that. He couldn't be prepared.

First time I ever heard my parents. argue. To this magnitude. As my mom yells she cough's. It was scary, and heartbroken at the same time.I didn't even want to hear no more of it.

Then after a couple of weeks.What we fear came into light. Our mom past.

When the news hit. Well at first, our grandmother informed this on us. Daddy was nowhere to be found. He took it really hard. He was stressed. he was a muscular. He got so depression, stop working out, didn't shaved.

He wasn't strong at all. We caught him a couple of times ,just sleeping holding her night gowns.

My father was never quite the same after that. As we got older. We just over threw our father. We sort of kind of bullied. Our way into things.I think losing our mom. Made him weaker. He hardly smile ,just grin. We would catch him dazing off in a daze. Multiple times.

My father after a while was starting to loose sense of reality. His job winding up firing him. He loved being a fireman. It was a shocked that he lost it. our house we had .He lost it due to lost payments.

To be honest I think he lost it on purpose. That house brought on too much memories. Heartbreak, bad heartbreak. I remember their favorite song. Every time it would come on he gets upsets. Turn it off. Then clearly be bothered by it.

Me, and Ray basically raise ourselves. From the day we lost our mom Ray just basically followed me. He dressed like the way I dressed. All the toys I wanted he wanted. He wore everything I taught him everything about life.

Especially females. I remember I was going to college. Ray was about to start high school. At my old school. He was so nervous. I was very popular in high school.I was the ladies man. Was considered one of the top boys in the school.

I told him to tell them he was my brother. He would 've no problems. It was kind of tough for me to leave.me ,and Ray are close.I was gonna miss him. dearly .My father not to much he didn't really care. I started to despise him.

Get over my mom death, you got kids to look after. You sad about it. That understandable .I don't want to sound harsh. But some things you just can't control. We was kids. I had to be the man of the house.I was mad at him for years cause he was weak.

I was going to another state by myself. I was leaving my bestfriend ,my heart brother alone.Up here, basically to fend for himself.

The first week ,man he called me nonstop. Everyday I didn't mind I miss him so much. He was informing me everything going on around the area. Letting me know daddy was still the same.After school started like the first week. It was great for him he informed me. He got a like two dates. I told him ,what to do.Where to take them.

While I'm attending school.I run into this girl at this popular hangout joint. The kids used to hang out at. Autumn man. Autumn Autumn Autumn. Like when I see her. I thought she was pretty, that why I approached her.

But when I started to talk to her. Her smile ,her the words she was saying. Was magical, I couldn't describe it. I can wrap a woman like that. But that night she wrap me. The more I talk the more I got nervous. I remember our first day of meeting. It not a day go by I don't think about it. We talk for hours.

Nothing but laugh's. I was going to school, for criminal I wanted to be lawyer. She was going for business. We went on a couple of dates after that

Each date we went on. It just got better, and better.Nights that you could remember for years to come. She may looked shy but she had a wild side to her.

Wasn't to long after that we started dating. We was dating very hard with each other. We seeing each other everyday, second ,minute,hour.Hell even days. We instantly fell in love with each other.

We was the perfect couple comparing to the other couples on campus. All I thought about was Autumn. To a point where it was crushing my goals.

It started to crushed both of our goals. My grades was slacking badly. I never really study when I had free time.I was just under Autumn all the time.I would just work.Then chill with Autumn

The love I once had for believing in going in out the courtroom, fighting cases. The thrill of debates, an arguments. .I was going to be the best defense attorney since Johnny Cohran.

All that change that when,I met Autumn. I barely was passing. My classes. I paid so many others students to do my work.I didn't learned nothing.i wasn't calling back home like I used.I hear from Ray, and my father was in a while.

My father was still the same. Ray was a teenager doing what teenagers do.Nothing really change they wasn't in danger. See Autumn was just like the season. Cool not hot nor cold, just right.

Like when you see the leaves fall, the scenery. How it be beautiful it be.That how would I describe it. I turn down so many girls for her. A lot of them was gorgeous. I can't even lie man.

But they just didn't have what Autumn had. What we had. Nothing was worth. Losing my relationship over any one of them girls.

Autumn got a lil job working at a party promoter. Around Atlanta, It was a party scene. So she started to work a lot. This was her dream to be in the music industry, entertainment business.I didn't mind at first, she was only working three days a week. So she was stil home some times.

See I 'am an homebody. I don't really like being around people.Only people I would be around is my family,work and my Autumn. Those was the people I loved. They I needed in my life.

I no longer wanted to be a lawyer. I wanted to be a husband to a woman I loved. I got my degree, just went to working. Me, and Autumn got a little apartment. It was a one bedroom. It was big enough for the both of us.

Autumn started to get real good this party promoter thing. Everybody around town knew her. The better the party she threw. The more people graduated towards her. The guys, even the famous ones will constantly makes passes at her.

I started to hate that job. People calling all times of the night. She started to work damn near everyday. She started to love it. Embrace the love she was getting.

We would go to to the mall. She got the hook up with everybody. Giving her discounts on anything she wanted.

We didn't even had date nights no more, all she wanted to do was going to parties. We didn't have no time for each other.Just another time.

I was trying to build a life. She was a building a career. Me, and her started to argue constantly. She started to lie to me.About her whereabouts. It started to kill me.

She started to hangout with the bad crowd. Her friends was what you would call. Loose females. They was known for sleeping with guys. Drug dealers, celebrities. Any men with money. Autumn, was around these girls. They use to be over at our apartment all the time.

I told Autumn to not let them girls in the house.I cursed them out one day.I just came home,from a long day .They was in the apartment making a lot of noise. On the accountant that I don't like them anyway. I exploded on them. It got so bad that one of the girls call they boyfriend over here.

We had an altercation. Him, and his boys jumped on me.After that I forbid Autumn from talking to them. She didn't listen. That when our relationship took the turn for the worse.

She started to take more jobs. Now she would even travel out of state. Our relationship was getting bad. Me, and her family connections started to get more worser.

They didn't want me around at all. Autumn had a miscarriage, her family blames me. We never quite got over that hump.

I tried everything I could think of. She was just focusing on her work .not the relationship. She comes home she barely like me touching her. It was like she was disgusted to see me.Even be around me.

I called Ray back home, Ray was living life.down back home. He was telling me I need to leave, and come back home. Forget about Autumn. I started to think about life with out her. Everytime I did it. She wasn't that far away.

I knew what I had to do.I have 3,500 save up. Her birthday was coming up.I went to jewlery store.I brought an engagement ring.I been wanting to do this for a while.I wanted to wait until I get a better job. So I can support her with.

A job that I can be proud of. I had it all planed out. She was out of town. She was coming back for her birthday. I left work early that day. I went to the grocery store ,to get her lobster tail. It was her favorite food.

Even though we been going through some stuff. I was still excited about this day.April 18,that her birthday. The day I was gonna propose to her. The day she will be mine forever.

I get home by like 4pm.I'm getting the bags form the store. Out of the car. I'm just jolly.Because in the back in my mind.I know she going to married me.This is what she wanted. I was even singing. The four tops song "Ain't no woman like the one I got."

As I'm singing loud as I can. I open the door,There she was in the living room.I was startled at first. Seeing her, I said"" Damn babe you scared me. I chuckled al lil bit.

As I set the bags down.I started to look at her. She had her head down,I seen bags around her. It start clicking. She was leaving me.

I just stood there with a deep stared. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. She just grabbed her bags. Just head right on out the door. Didn't stop what so ever.I just stood by the door. For a whole hour.

It didn't hit me yet ,at all. I just collapsed on the floor holding the engagement ring.I tried to call. But I didn't want to hear the rejection.

I went into our bedroom where we once slept. Just stared at the wall. trying to transpire what the hell just happen. If it's a dream.O r is it real or not.

I didn't know what to do. The next a couple of days I went to work.Just was lost.I work with machinery, like a factory. I had to be careful. One bad move can kill me.I was all over the place. Almost walked in front of a forklift.

To be honest. I wanted that forklift to hit me. To get rid of the pain I was dealing with already.I didn't wan to live. Autumn was everywhere. Except with me .

I got home,I called Ray. told Ray what happen he demanded I come home. To stay with his fiance Claire.I was so wrapped up with Autumn .I didn't go,because she couldn't. She hated Ray , for some reason.

Ray paid for my flight back.I hated going home.I was coming back home with nothing.I got my bachelor degree. It took me 5 years to get. Gained bout 30 pounds since I been down there.No girl,no love, just debt in student loans, and debt in love.

When Ray picked me up, I couldn't even smile when I see them.I miss RAY no doubt, but Autumn nonsense. Was still on my mind. Ray, and his fiance welcome me with open arms.

Claire sort of resembles, Autumn a lil bit. Tall darkskin. Even wear her hair the same. She wear like peace beads like Autumn. She was very friendly.to me. My first night back home. My father came over,I talked with him for a lil bit.Just in a daze.

There was a moment. We sitting in the living room. We the T.V off. While I'm looking at my father. we sitting next to each other. WE ARE THE SAME!!.The heartbreak like when our mother passed.is the same I feeling.I was scared as hell.

Every time the phone rings. Or the door bell rings I hope it 's It her. Asking me to come back to her. That she willing to give me another chance.

Ray wanted to throw a big BBQ for my return.I didn't want to be bother with anybody, or anything. I didn't want to see my old friends,or family.

The BBQ was here.it was so many people there. Mostly family,friends from high school.Some people around the neighborhood too. They really haven't seen me like 7 years.

I left a 18 year old kid. With a dreams of being a lawyer. To come back in seven years as a heartbroken down bum. That can't get over heartbreak.

Everybody coming to me. Saying Hi. oh hey good to see ya. All that phony shit. When they leave here.I know how they gonna talk about how I look.

I know they hear about Autumn. They can see it my eyes,That I lost her. They can see I gained about 30 - to 40 pounds. Since I been there.

As I look around the yard. See all those faces smiling, and dancing .I didn't belong here.I haven't felt home in a long time.What is home? When there nothing you love is there.

Times is changed. Ray was the talk of the town. Everybody love him. Like I was when I was coming up. He started to DJ for a couple of famous rappers. He was like a celebrity. He introduce me to all his friends that was there.

his crew was a wild bunch. They was very flashy. They was successful young men.Both legal ,and Illegal friends. Ray crossed over to both of the side of the world.I didn't fit in with them.

I started to get real tired. I snuck off to the room. To get some rest.I couldn't rest.I hated the sound of people being happy. So I couldn't rest.

As I'm going out of my room.I looked out my door. Ray, and Claire bedroom is next door to my room. The both of them standing in the doorway.

Ray was telling her to straighten up. Pointing his finger at her. While he had a liquor bottle in his hands.

As he left I walked to her room .I seen Claire on the edge of the bed crying her heart out. I was debating. Should I go say something.Or should I mind my business.

I went into the back porch. I look at Ray chugging liquor as his friends cheer him on.I realize Ray was changing for the worse. He was too deep in.

After everybody left. Ray was passed out on the couch. Claire was outside started to clean up.I went out there to help her.

The yard was a complete mess. So much liquor weed all around on the grass. It was despicable to leave someone house in that way.

I told her. I can't believe they will do that. She just laugh's .She used to Ray friends coming over here to create a mess. Then she be up all night into the morning cleaning.

I'll ask her why do she wait until the morning to clean. She responded ,by saying that Ray didn't like to see the yard messed up.

I was so tired that night. But It wouldn't be right if I 'll leave her by herself. So we just clean up. until we finished. We talked all night with Claire.Just bout life. Come to find out we have the same interests.

We loved the same books,movies,T.V. shows. We love the color sapphire. It becomes it brings peace. A lot of other things I got to know about my sister in Law. To be honest I smiled ,and laughed. It been a while I felt great after.

The next couple of weeks. It was up and down. Ray ,and Claire would argue all the time. For many reasons .I tried to stay out of it ,because It not really our business.

I got into the work field.I was a tow truck driver.I worked the evening shifts. So when I get home. Ray would be leaving out.

One night,I come home.I had a long day at work. So i was just gonna go to sleep. Get Ready for work tomorrow. Ray, Claire was arguing. I didn't want to hear it. So I just relaxed on the back porch. until they calm down.

They was arguing. Until I heard like a smack. I knew what it was. As I go in the back quietly. I see Ray storming out the front door.I see Claire come out the room. Holding her face. Lip is all bloody.

She stumbles I went to catch her .Put her on the couch to relax.I went to get some bags of ice. So she can put on her face. For the swelling, As I'm looking her. I felt so sad .

I ask her what happen. She informed me that Ray friend.Well she thought her ,and Ray was business partner. Come to find out they was having an affair.

This isn't the only time.i caught Ray cheating. He letting this music nonsense go to his head. He thinks because he buy's me things he could do whatever to me. I'm your faince. Going to be your wife. Love me, that all I ask. It to just love me ,

I was mad at Ray. this time I was gonna address this issue with him. He not suppose to be treating no woman like that. We raised better. Our daddy taught us, to love every woman like our mother. I wish I could love that person all over again.

Claire thank me. She said''This I wish Ray was more like you. I don't know what happen. It like everything vanished, and the only thing was left. Was, me ,and Claire.

We was both broken. Our hears lost.Out hearts was in the wrong location at the time.That night we found it. She didn't kiss me , or I kiss her. We kissed each other.

Sensation, relief, and comfort that what we was feeling.After we kissed I picked her up, and took her to the bed room. We made love that night.

I didn't think If I was wrong. To be honest I didn't care. This was a woman who needed love.I was the man that was gonna provided for her.

The next couple of weeks. we was sneaking around. Ray was getting more noticeable. Was traveling the whole world. Besides he was telling me he had a lot of other chicks.

So It would be me ,and her at the house just loving, and caring. I was loving it. I didn't event think about Autumn. I was falling in love with my brother wife.

One day Claire was throwing up all over the place. She wasn't sure of anything. of what was going on. She was afraid of the unthinkable.

To be honest I wasn't afraid. If she was pregnant, then I would man up .Handle my responsibilities as a father .I knew it would hurt Ray, but he didn't value Claire.like a man should value a woman like Claire.

This day she went to the doctor. I was at work. Ray just came back from the road. Every time he gets back f the road. He will sleep for the a couple of hours.then he would go on his way. Partying, drinking, and everything.

I was so excited. I could be a father. I was ready the last couple of weeks was special.Claire rejuvenated his life. Awaken his spirits, other than that she gave him hope. Believing that love can be restored in heartbreak.

I' remember ,I kept in touch with her the all day. She informed me she was coming home from the doctor. I immediately left work, and rushed home to hear what the doctor said. I didn't want her to tell me over the phone.

I bursted into the house.I seen Claire sitting on the couch in tears. I went to her to ask her what happen.

She confirmed she pregnant. I was happy.I got butterflies. Like when I was with Autumn .I Started to tear up.i thought I was gonna be a father. I hugged, her and rubbing telling her It was gonna be okay.

She just exploded. Got up angry, wiping hers tears.

Claire: ''You think It gonna be okay, I'm pregnant, because I'm sleeping with two brothers. I don't know who I'm pregnant by.

Marques: ''What you mean You don't know.I'm the only man u been sleeping with the last couple of weeks right?

Claire just was so silence. She would answer.

Marques:' 'Wait a minute, you been sleeping with Ray too.

Claire shakes her head. ''Listen he my husband, What you think.I still love him. I'm engage to him. This is the man I want to be with.

''Marques:" You still love him, you wasn't saying shit when I was sleeping with you. You telling me how he hurt. He don't know love you like you should. All this bullshit. How can you do this"?

Claire: "Listen It too late to go back, and forth with you. I'm pregnant. Ray can't find out.I'm sorry I love him more than you. We are getting married. Marques,can you see that.?

When she said those words to me.I just sunk down man.I got real low, All my emotions just went out. She was still talking. I started to go deaf. It was Heartbreak all over again Autumn all over gain.

Inside of me I can feel my hear just vanished. I was tired of all of this. Tired of heartbreak.I refuse to be deal with this kind of crime.

Breaking some heart.Or taking their love for granted is wrong. I didn't want to I was alone in this world.I didn't have nobody. Nobody had me.

I snapped. I charged at Claire, and squeeze her kneck. She was gasping for Air ,but I couldn't stop. She was like a damaged animal. If you let it run wild It would cause more mayhem. Every breathe I was taking from her. Was for the pain she did to my heart.

I just want to loved. That all. I just wanted to wake up next to the woman who loved me.I need someone to live for. Someone to provide for. Some who can be proud about me.

Now It late.I'm locked up for murdering, my brother soon to be wife. I gonna die in prison. I will accept that because If I was home I would be dying alone Anyway.

What even crazier I'm not even regretful.

The interviewer shook his head ,as he writes. He gets up to leave the room. Two officer's came in ,and put Marques in handcuff's. proceed to take him out .As he walking out the interrogations room.

Ray comes running.Their father behind him. 'Ray is just screaming while the other officers are trying to restrain him.

''why Marques ?Why ,just tell me why.? Marques just drop his head ,and continue with the officer s taking him to a cell ,Ray collapses on the floor. While their father holding him.