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Halfway There

Can what you believe change your life?

By Kirsty Lee HuttonPublished 3 years ago 10 min read
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Halfway There
Photo by Andreea Popa on Unsplash

Ali

Believe you can and you’re halfway there ~ Theodore Roosevelt

Ali studied the words on the page for a moment, then looked up at the woman walking away. The older lady hurried through the gazebo and turned slightly to her left, quickly moving out of view and into the darkness.

“It’s your turn now,” she had said.

So this is where we’re at, thought Ali. I look so desperate sitting alone in the park that a homeless woman has given me one of her few possessions.

Ali turned the small notebook over in her hands. The dark cover was battered and creased, and the edges of the pages had become soft. Despite the soft edges, the individual pages were still flat and clean. Each page held just one entry of neatly written text.

Ali used her right thumb to flick the pages without actually opening to any of them. The soft edges of the paper made the book fan unevenly. It was clear the pages had been touched many times.

Instinctively squeezing some hand sanitiser into her palm, Ali rubbed her hands together as the book sat in her lap. She hadn’t finished looking at it, but the urge to sanitise her hands after touching it got the better of her.

When her hands had dried, the smell of alcohol lingered in her nostrils. Ali opened the book to the inside cover, careful not to read any other pages.

There was a scrap of paper taped to the inside cover of the book. Ali’s nose wrinkled ever so slightly as she noticed the two pieces of tape that held the message in place were different sizes, and the one at the bottom was crooked.

The instructions were brief and to the point. It was handwritten, but the writing was different from that of the Roosevelt quote.

You’ve received the gift of magic. Each day, open this book to one page (and one page only). Let your heart lead you to the page of the day. Read that page. Believe it. Embody it. Live it. Apply it to your life. The universe will send you everything you create in your mind. Take care, for you are more powerful than you think. You will know when it’s time to hand this book on.

Alice

Josh smiled at Alice as she offered him the bag of Doritos. He wiped his hand on his jeans as if that would remove all germs, and helped himself to just two chips. Alice loved Doritos, the same way she knew Josh loved chocolate chip cookies.

They always shared what they had, but they also both secretly pretended not to be hungry when the other offered their favourite treat.

Alice wondered whether her own son would like Doritos or cookies more if he’d lived to try either of them. She’d had just three days with that perfect baby, and they were her most treasured days.

Josh was much younger than her son would be by now, but she considered him family.

“What’s our mantra for today?” Asked Josh once Alice had finished enjoying her breakfast of Doritos.

“Maybe today will be the one that’ll bring us riches,” said Alice as she carefully took the notebook from the inside pocket of her well-worn jacket. It was often too warm to need the jacket at this time of year, but the secret pocket had a button to keep it secure, and Alice liked having her precious book close.

Go for a walk and something will happen ~ Cheryl Strayed,” read Alice. She saw the blank look on Josh’s face. “That’s that Wild woman. She walked across half of America or something to find herself. But I think she really found herself when she sold the movie rights.”

“Meh,” Josh shrugged. “I can handle something happening today. Where shall we walk?” He began zipping up his backpack, well, zipping the one compartment that still had a zip. The rest was held together by an assortment of different sized safety pins.

“St Kilda?” suggested Alice. “I always feel like there are more possibilities by the ocean.”

The beach at St Kilda was nothing like the beaches Australia put on its tourism guides. The nice beaches were up north. St Kilda beach was usually cold, but it was frequented by an eclectic bunch of individuals - from wealthy boat owners to drifters like Alice and Josh, everyone found a way to belong.

They found their people on the grassy area beside an ice cream shop. Alice settled down to catch up with Bruce. She could tell he wasn’t doing well from the moment he spoke.

“Jesus is going to stop all of this,” he told her with urgency, his eyes darting from the waves to the sky. He looked directly at Alice and mumbled something she didn’t quite catch.

“I know Bruce,” she nodded kindly. “I know.” What Alice knew was not to try and argue with Bruce when he was in this state.

A couple of the younger guys who Alice didn’t recognise were lying on the grass nearby. They were far too skinny and had that sad, faraway look in their eyes. They weren’t even present enough to notice Alice. It was hard to believe Josh was like that when she first met him. He was doing well these days. She hoped Josh would contact his parents soon. As a mother, she knew she would always give her son another chance, but Josh wasn’t sure he was worthy of that yet.

Josh glanced uncomfortably at the drugged-out guys, and Alice thought she saw him shiver. She couldn’t be sure, and she couldn’t quite read the look on his face. Was it disgust, sadness, familiarity or something else?

“I’m going for a swim,” said Josh to Alice as he dropped his backpack at her side. “We’ve walked, now let’s see what’s going to happen. I’m hoping for some washed-up pirate treasure or something like that.”

Alice knew Josh was sceptical of the magic of the book, but she appreciated him playing along each day. She knew their luck would change; they just had to believe it. She knew something big was coming their way.

Josh wasn’t in the water long before returning to the group. “Too cold?” asked Alice as Josh dried his chest with a ripped towel from his backpack. Alice noticed Josh’s hand paused over the All or Nothing tattoo on his chest. It didn’t really matter what the daily mantra was, she knew Josh lived by All or Nothing, which meant deep down, until he fixed it all or had it all, he felt he had nothing.

Alice was so proud of Josh for kicking his drug habit and seriously looking for employment. He’d even rented a room near the city for a while, but left it because the temptation to slip into old habits was too much.

If we could just have a few things go our way, thought Alice. A stable home, a few new clothes and a shower every day. Josh would get a job and create that All. Then his parents would see what she saw in him.

“Go for a walk and something will happen,” whispered Alice.

Eventually, the sun set, night fell, and the people by the beach started to disperse. Alice and Josh walked along the beach towards the city. Alice spotted something gold in the sand in front of her. She allowed herself a moment to believe it was a gold nugget or the treasure Josh had hoped for. It wasn’t. It was an everyday one dollar coin. She picked it up anyway. It was better than a discarded bottle top.

She slipped the coin into the pocket with the notebook, and they kept walking.

“That might have been a lucky coin,” said Alice hopefully.

“Maybe,” agreed Josh.

“We’ll use it when the book is bringing us all the magic,” said Alice with a nod of her head. Josh checked his watch. It was after midnight.

“It’s a new day,” he said to Alice. “Should we see what’s in store for us?”

The two stopped on the street as Alice flipped the book open.

Sometimes things become possible if we want them bad enough ~ T.S. Eliot,” read Alice. She looked at Josh and grinned. “Yes, this is it.”

By chance, they’d stopped across the road from an old RSL club. Along with serving affordable meals, the side room contained facilities for horserace betting and poker or slot machines.

“We want our riches bad enough, I know it,” said Alice as she fished into her pocket for the coin. “Finding this just before,” she held the coin in two fingers up to Josh. “And having the pokies just there… It’s time.”

“Happy to want to get rich with you, Alice,” said Josh as they crossed the road and entered the dark gaming room.

The carpet was sticky and wearing thin in patches of high traffic. Alice stopped at the second machine. We need this, she thought. She wasn’t greedy. She just wanted enough to set them up in a rented house and let Josh be workplace-presentable each day. She knew the rest would take care of itself.

The coin clinked into the machine and Alice pressed a button. She didn’t really know what button to press; she’d never been one for gambling.

When the machine displayed the $20,000 jackpot and started sounding bells and chimes, Josh looked like he’d seen a ghost. Alice’s hands shook as she took the money from the venue manager and handed half to Josh.

“Don’t spend it all at once,” she said. “On Monday we’ll set it up in the bank, but for now, make sure you keep it hidden and close to your body.”

Although winning the cash was cause for celebration, Josh and Alice didn’t look like the standard patrons for most local bars, and neither one wanted the humiliation of being denied entry.

Instead, they purchased a bottle of sparkling wine from the local supermarket and clinked 'cheers' to each other with plastic cups. When Alice decided it was time to turn in, Josh said he’d catch her in the morning. He was keen to keep celebrating.

As she watched Josh walk away, she smiled at the new life the money would bring him. Sometimes things become possible if we want them bad enough.

Ali

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there,” whispered Ali and snorted a little. If only lives could be saved when you’re only halfway there. She looked across the park to the hospital. It was an ugly building, she thought to herself. The dated cream brick exterior didn’t do justice to the modern equipment held within.

Her mind drifted back to the patient she’d just lost. He’d injected more drugs than someone like that could usually afford. Ali refused to judge. All too often, she’d seen the havoc addiction could play. But how the hell could he have paid for that much?

She didn’t even know his name, but she had believed she could save him. She probably did get halfway there. In fact, she knew she did. They’d restored a heartbeat twice before he flatlined for good. Halfway there.

The cheap tattoo across her patient’s chest was more accurate: All or Nothing.

Today it was nothing. Ali tossed the notebook into her handbag and reapplied her hand sanitiser. She stood, took a deep breath and walked back towards the hospital.

The bright lights were jarring against the dark Melbourne night. It was 12:05am when Ali put her bag in her locker and prepared to tackle the last stint of her shift. Technically it was a new day, so she picked up the little black notebook. Ali believed in science, but right now, she needed a little magic.

She read the words in front of her;

Sometimes things become possible if we want them bad enough ~ T.S. Eliot.

humanity
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About the Creator

Kirsty Lee Hutton

Founder of the marketing agency, Style Publishing

* Obsessed with marketing

* Children’s book author

* Journalist

* Personal Trainer

* Degrees in Law and Media

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