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Get. To. Bed!.

by Elijah N. James 12 days ago in single

3am musings...

Get. To. Bed!.

“Get. To. Bed!.” Now! I hear the sensible decry.

You must get horizontal, or no woman’ll come near you. Because they like that. Women. Being horizontal. Most of the time, anyway. Anyway…

…Oh, I'm not going to go all the way with that, but let's just leave it at this. This n’ that. You'll get your girl as a matter of course. Ofc.

Let me know how this makes you feel. What do you think of the concept of horizontal relationships in general? Now I’m vertical. It’s incredible. I don’t believe you, either. Have you ever been single and had a woman as well? How does it make you feel, the way it makes me feel, the way I feel? Feelings. You can post it in the comments section. And so commences “faucet capitalism” aka revenue streams. Miniscule. Who the fuck are you? Charles Dickens? Writing for a penny a word? That’s faucet capitalism, baby! Whore yourself out for the word. The Living word!

Whore yourself out. Venus and Mars. Wars and whores.

For Iesus Christus is the Living Word. He was born on the Christmas Day. He’s coming to get yer, whether you like it, or not! It’s free for all, there’s no need to pay. So, you can have it if you want it say it. TEMBBLD. Best psychobilly, ever.

It's a nice topic, and a very important topic. We're talking about this topic right now, right? You are? Atah bein ha’Adam b’tokha! We're talking about this topic right now, right? What do you think about the concept of horizontal relationships in general? Because I’m vertical - x, y, & z - and she’s drenched, in bed. Cause it rhymes with Zed. Not zee. Or she’d be drenched in pee.

Anyway, we like that, don’t we? Being horizontal. And vertical. x, y, & z - between you and me. From time-to-time. Have you ever been single and had a woman as well? How does it make you feel, the way it makes me feel, the way I feel? Feelings. Those becomings. You can post it in the comments section. And so commenced “faucet capitalism.” It's a nice topic, and a very important topic. We're talking about this topic right now, right?

Aren’t we?

A blowjob joke: “you can look up to me, anytime you want. As long as I can look down on you.” I think it would be pretty cool if I can look down on you whenever I want. As long as you can look up to me, I don't have to look down on you.

I mean, it's not like I have a bunch of boyfriends that I like and it's not like that I even go out with men, right? We're not dating any men for the sole purpose of being attractive. We're just making fun of each other because of our similar personalities. I'm not interested in just being a girlfriend or girlfriend in name only.

Because of that, I think it would be awesome if I could just look down on you whenever I wanted. I mean, I'm going to look down on you the way you are. If you just look down on me, I'm going to feel just as worthless. I'm going to be embarrassed and feel guilty for staring down at you like I do. When I'm not looking down at you, I'm going to have to look in your eyes, or pretend to so I can look up at you. I don't want you to feel like a failure for not wanting to be looked at by me. If you want to just be interested in your own self, well, then that's great, but if you want me to get all flustered and look at you, then that's okay too. And if you want me to look at you in the eyes, then that's okay too, but only if you don't expect me to look at you in my eyes. As long as I can look down on you and pretend that I can look up at you the way you look at me, that's all that I want.

And if you were ever looking at me like you do now, that's okay too. Maybe I'll see you like that from time to time, but I'm not that type of girl. I don't want to be looked at like that.

But maybe I am, and I'm just scared of people actually thinking that I don't want to be looked at like that.

Objectify me. Down on one knee. Picking up the broken pieces. Of trust. Trust was the morning as it broke.

Fin.

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מָ״ג

single
Elijah N. James
Elijah N. James
Read next: 'Chocolate Kisses'
Elijah N. James

Wyrdsmyth, seasoned & weathered, semi-retired, Deleuzean schizze, considerable Mancunian, rural reunionist, confederate-voter.

See all posts by Elijah N. James