Fulfillment is Knowing What Enough Means to You.

Fulfillment is knowing what enough means to you. To quote the ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu,

"Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking, the whole world belongs to you."

How much is enough?

As a rookie financial adviser twenty-five years ago, I recall a meeting with a couple who said, "There is never enough money." They stood out because I was new on the job, and I can still remember their financial situation.

Together they had a household income of almost $200,000 (an excellent income twenty-five years ago), a Cadillac with a lease payment of over $800 per month, and a four-bedroom home in a desirable neighborhood.

But they felt it was not enough.

Simple reminders

I was sharing with my partner how challenging it can be to gain traction in what I am doing now compared to how easy it was in my past career as a financial advisor.

She challenged that idea. Reminding me how much time I have now — spending half my year in the sun on beautiful beaches, etc.

We all want a life of abundance. A life where we have enough. So, how do we know what's enough? It is not when we have all that we want. But when we decide that nothing is lacking!

Here are five ways to live a life of enough.

Be grateful.

I shower twice a day no matter where I live. And I am so grateful for access to clean water. I am also thankful that a cafe serving a good Americano is never far off.

It is too easy to forget how much you do have. And how much there is to be grateful for. But I am making a point to get back to writing what Abraham Hicks terms positive aspects — the practice of listing all the things for which to be grateful. I have an exhaustive list, as I am sure you do too.

Science has shown that writing a list of things you can be grateful for actually re-wires your brain and increases your health and sense of well-being.

2. Leave the past behind.

Our memories of the past are never accurate. Studies have shown that. We either romanticize or demonize it- our experiences and the people in it.

Embrace the present. It's the only thing you have that's guaranteed. Nurture your present relationships and the person you're becoming.

3. Be mindful of your thoughts.

As Tony Robbins said, "Energy flows where focus goes." Creating a life of abundance starts with managing your mental and physical energy. It's what fuels the imagination, your creativity, and your purpose for living. Guard your thoughts.

When negative thoughts enter your mind, become aware of them. Question your beliefs behind those thoughts. Re-script them to more empowering ones that support the life you want.

4. Watch your words.

Words have power in them. Are the conversations you have with your friends predominantly positive or negative? It is not about being eternally optimistic but being aware of the dominant energy in those conversations. Are they mainly complaints about life? Remember that misery loves company.

Practice thinking before speaking. Sometimes we blurt out things that we later regret. Mastering your life includes controlling your tongue. You may feel it's never enough, but you don't have to speak about lack. It doesn't mean being inauthentic or lying. When a disempowering thought enters your mind, turn it around. E.g., Instead of "I can't afford this," say, "I can't afford this yet" or "I wonder what I need to do so I can afford this."

5. Choose your friends wisely.

If you notice that most of your friends are complainers or tend to play the victim, it may be time to look at creating new connections with people who can support the vision of the life you want.

Do most of your friends believe there is never enough? If yes, then it may be time to make some new friends.

Bringing it all together.

Achieving a fulfilling life starts with being grateful for your life. If you believe there is never enough, you’ll always feel dissatisfied even if you were to accomplish all your goals.

This does not mean being complacent without any drive or goals. It does mean that nurturing an attitude of gratitude can put you in a state of feeling fulfilled, which is the fuel to create and achieve more.

Two life-affirming books to help you achieve a more fulfilling life are Gretchen Rubin’s “The Happiness Project and Robin Sharma’s “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari.”